Communing with Animals

Lawd ave mercy looka wha dis world coming to!

St. Peter’s Anglican Church has long been known as an open and inclusive place.

So open, it seems, they won’t turn anyone away. Not even a dog.

That’s how a blessed canine ended up receiving communion from interim priest Rev. Marguerite Rea during a morning service the last Sunday in June.

According to those in attendance at the historical church at 188 Carlton St. in downtown Toronto, it was a spontaneous gesture, one intended to make both the dog and its owner – a first timer at the church — feel welcomed. But at least one parishioner saw the act as an affront to the rules and regulations of the Anglican Church. He filed a complaint with the reverend and with the Anglican Diocese of Toronto about the incident – and has since left the church.

Wunnah cud believe dat doah? De priest-ess gi de dog communion in de people church! Imagine that!

And fa all the non-church people dat gine say wha dis a trivial issue compared to priests sexual assaulting an de pope an rah rah rah. Is a different issue an wunnah cud put um in whatever perspective wunna want but um is an issue anyways an um is the one I decide to tackle. So like um or lump um. Dun. And yes I in an antagonistic mood so doan mess wid me this blessed day.

Man wunnah animal people gone too far now. Too too far this time, a line has been crossed. But imagine that though. The holy sacrament given to a dog by a priest? Wha dem wafers is doggie treats now? chupse!

To me this makes a incredible mockery of the whole communion act. How you going to give a animal communion? Wha this flies against anything that ya read in the bible or that Jesus ever teach. Absolute ridiculousness. And wid de sorta animal people we got these days ya know ya duz only gotta gi dem a inch an dem duz tek a mile. Wha next ting dem wud be telling ya that little Ruff Ruff wanta be ordained an he halfway to priesthood cause he already used to wearing a round collar.

Looka muh crosses though.

But step back though, just step back a minute. Y'all dat know anything bout church (de resta wunnah heathens keep quiet) notice anything else wrong here? Maybe its just me but I figure if a fella just step into you church for the first time as was suggested by the article then he shouldn't be in line to tek no communion.

Yes I know the priest dont ask for no id or baptismal papers when he handing out communion (and maybe he should hmmm) and is between you and ya maker to know if you eligible or not but still. The whole point of communion is that its a commemoration of a covenant between you and the lord so you gotta be straight or ya should be straight wid ya life and ya commitment to the savior. I lie?

And priests and Christians gotta realize a lot lotta a people nowadays doan know nuttin bout church and communion an duz juss be following fashion. Dem see everybody else get up and get a sip a wine an a pieca wafer an figure dem gine join de buffet line too cause duh mout dry.

Naa man I feel that priests and priestesses need to state plainly look if ya not right wid ya maker doan be coming up here to get nuh free wine. This aint dat sorta gathering atall atall. See it an doan see it an doan let um tempt ya eidda. Leff it off one time! Well not in dem words exactly but something elegant and more friendly and wid some tact an dem sorta skills dat I apparently lack but wid de said same exact point.

Cause the thing is they devaluing the act of communion and the people that know better ie the christians and the christian leaders letting um slide an saying a fella aint kno nuh better. Well who fault um is that he aint kno nuh better is wunnah wun cause wunnah need to explain to the fella wha he doing before he do um.

Let he know membership has its privileges, free wine, free wafer, free afterlife etc etc but doan let he get up an guh having the communion an aint paying he dues so to speak.

Lebronalypse Now

Well its been about two weeks now since the "self proclaimed" King Lebron James made his move to Cleveland. I had wanted to write something about it earlier and truth be told I've got another post about Chris Bosh and kids and heroes that I wrote just before the Lebron announcement but I couldn't bring myself to or find the time to write about Lebron's big decision before now.

What can I say that hasn't already been said. Not much really.

Lebron may win championship(s) in Miami but dude has done some serious damage to his image and his brand. Not that he had no right leaving for Miami but dude could have shown some class and done it a bit better. The Decision TV show was just silly and really showed up his immaturity but then again he's a pro athlete who's been pampered all his life how's he supposed to know the right way to act in public lol.

However I did think his people would or should have spoken to him beforehand and said hey guy consider your image. By going to Wade's Miami the team isn't even yours anymore. You're not even clearly the alpha dog. Kobe fought to rid himself of Shaq who shared the spotlight but Lebron willingly steps into a situation where he's sharing the spotlight. Go figure! Maybe its just symbolic of the new generation and the way we raise our kids. The phrase used to be "without struggle there is no progress" but these guys are now likely to give up the struggle or try to find help in shouldering the burden instead of trying themselves first.

Not sure I'm down with that. Yea sharing the burden is cool but sometimes you gotta be the man and try to overcome the hump yourself. Jordan did, Barkley, Ewing, Malone etc tried but failed but at the same time we respect them for rising to the challenge and taking teams on their back and trying to win. You can always jump teams later on and try to win as a second fiddle and ride a younger cats coattails but in your peak naa man you want the glory all for yourself.

But who knows! I am sure this move does take Lebron out of the G.O.A.T equation though. Jordan, Kobe, Dr J stay ahead cause they were/are the man and willingly accepted it.

but maybe Lebron is onto something. A new kinder more top dog. No longer alpha dog, a beta dog perhaps? Maybe this teaches kids valuable lessons about sharing and combining forces to reach a goal instead of being obstinate and hardheaded and not making it over the hump. Perhaps.

Oh well, all I know is that for now Lebron gutted Cleveland which from what I've read was already a sports town with somewhat lowered self esteem and I cant back him for that. Yea owners do players dirty sometimes so you can say he owed the team nothing but what about the fans. The guys who loved you as their hometown saviour? Got to be hard on them. And its not like the team didn't try to accommodate you. You think they didn't made that Shaq deal to please you or that deal for Antoine Jameson? They built around you, it just didn't work and hence this oh so messy messy divorce necessitates counseling on the part of some of the Clevelanders.

C'est la vie though. As they all say its a business. Do your thing. Just hope you win some championships in South Beach and don't tire of being the Beta dog. Oh and can you even go home again after what you did to the guys there? I don't know man I just don't know.

Punked!

Seriously the whole of Toronto got punked during the G20 conference. It'd be funny if it wasnt also sad lol.

Prior to the event it was made known that the Premier and the Ontario government had passed in secret a law allowing police to search and arrest anyone within 5 metres of the G20 fence over the weekend.

Well now it has come to light that there was no such law. They all lied to us! The Premier, the police chief, they all lied.

While we were busy saying shame on the Ontario government for secretly passing such a law in secret and the police were actually enforcing this supposed law and stopping folks at random within 5 metres of the fence and just in general on the streets of downtown Toronto over the weekend for searches, this law never existed.

Whoa! How ya like dem apples?

So now everyone is upset cause we got lied to and in essence punked (without Ashton Kushner). What can ya say?

All I know is I can understand why folks are upset. Public officials of the stature of your police chief and premier aren't supposed to willfully lie to you like that. I mean politicians lie like crazy so we sort of expect that but the Police chief too. Damn! I'm sure they have their reasons but if they were telling lies about that then you get the sneaking suspicion that they are telling lies about other stuff too. Can we ever trust them again? That supposed trust between public and public officials is evaporating so what next? Does this mean the anarchists are winning? God forbid!

Well boy these days is funny nights.

G20 - The Aftermath

Despite the lock-down of the Canada’s largest city, the wanton destruction by vandals and the hundreds of arrests, Mr. Harper said he believes that “99.9 per cent of Torontonians were very pleased and honoured to have these leaders here and were very hospitable.”
Globe and Mail newspaper

I was nowhere near the G20 protests this weekend but after watching the events unfold on tv all weekend I actually feel like I have some sort of post-traumatic stress. And if that's me, a simple tv viewer, imagine all the folks who were involved in the war that occurred on the usually peaceful streets of Toronto. It got so bad for me that at one point I switched from watching the live coverage to watching an extremely gruesome episode of Band of Brothers just to relax lol.

Now much will be written about what went down this weekend but I just wanted to say my two little cents based on a few more things I noticed Sunday.

First off, Prime Minister Harper judging by the above comment is sadly mistaken about Torontonians' views on this conference. We didnt want it here, we were unhappy that it was here and we were getting even more unhappy as the events on our streets were unfolding. The city was turned into an armed camp, draconian if temporary laws were passed, violence was inflicted on both our citizens and our businesses. Not exactly anything for us to cheer about Mr PM so why would we be happy? My mother always says you dont poke out your eye to please people and that is exactly what we in Toronto did here today or was done to us. To please foreign dignitaries Toronto had its eye poked out.

The Police whose response had been relatively measured on Saturday seemingly resorted to heavy handed tactics Saturday over night and into Sunday. It seemed to be a case of what was it George Bush called it some years ago preemptive strikes or basically if you looked suspicious or were someplace we didnt think you had no right being we were going to arrest you. Seems like they vacillated from one extreme of passivity on Saturday allowing the burning of police cars and vandalism of businesses along two of our major thoroughfares to an extreme of excessive force against citizens on Sunday. Shouldn't there have been some balance point in between doing nothing to what happened with numerous citizens claiming to have been arrested for no reason or hit by police batons? sigh!

Also where were our elected representatives and opposition politicians condemning what was happening as Toronto was getting a black eye. I only heard Adam Vaughn and Oliva Chow give their feedback. Oh and Mayor Miller who was soooo surprised by what was happening. Whatever dude! But I at least expected Michael Ignatieff, the Liberal opposition leader, who has been floundering in the polls to take this opportunity to say something positive and try to show that he actually is up on whats happening in this country. Dude you suck!

And while I'm calling out politicians and police leave no doubt that citizens too take much of the blame for this debacle. If ya see people doing foolishness stay your ass home. Dont leave to go down and add more conflict to the mayhem already ensuing.

I was shocked by the number of just curious onlookers and gawkers, taking photos as policemen tried to keep the peace. People who didnt really look like they knew what was being protested or didnt care one way or the other but just came out to be part of it as one youth said in a television interview just to say that they were there. Maybe its this generation weened on reality tv but for me I would think that violence on the streets is not a photo op. Seriously people you have a responsibility as citizens to be better than that.

Thoughts from G20 - Saturday

Please note these are just my thoughts from watching this crap on TV as I was no where near downtown.

- Lawless so called protesters are breaking windows at people's stores. Doesn't even seem like most of the stores are big businesses just small man little mom n pop type operations. How is this helping anything? I wish someone would catch all the culprits and make them pay for the damages.

- The Mayor and Police chief keep saying that they didn't expect this level of violence. Really? Hello! Did you not see the same videos of fires and water cannons from protests at previous summits. G20 meetings breed violence, this is well known. What is this we didn't expect this crap. How can you say that and still have taken all these precautions?

- They just showed a picture of a couple down at the protests with a camera and their baby in a stroller. Seriously? You bring you baby down to a protest where 5 police cars were burnt. Where is children's services when you need them.

- Its interesting how people try to justify this assault on Toronto by saying its nothing compared to what people in other countries are experiencing. Really, that's your excuse for mashing up peoples livelihoods?

- And the argument that they are disenfranchised youth. So this gives them the right to throw feces into people's stores and smash windows at random. What a load of crap! Quite literally.

- Interesting all the so called protest crap and the G20 leaders are all but oblivious to the goings on on the street. While police risk their lives on the street to stop protesters Harper, Obama et al are all sitting down to dinner, relaxing. Got to love that!

- All things in perspective, the Toronto police have been relatively subdued. 150 arrested, didn't use any major tear gas or water cannons or sound cannons ....yet.

- 1500 police officers so far in downtown Toronto. whoa!

- No public transit service downtown, hospitals on lockdown, Eaton centre on lockdown. Imagine you live downtown and were sick or had to go to hospital. Crazy!

-Torontoist reporting police beating up protesters.

- Why does the Mayor keep insisting the violent protesters are all not from Toronto? I mean I think that a majority of them aren't from here, just professional rabble rousers but you have to be open to the possibility that there are some lawless Torontonians see this as a chance to start some ish.

- Amazing how many people are just down there to see what is happening and taking photos. I mean I love taking photos but no way was I leaving my home with a camera to go down to a violent protest.

And this is just Saturday. Imagine what's going to happen tomorrow?

Tabloidism

I escape for a quick trip to Barbados the other day. Pure niceness.

Just as I was settling in @home guess who also arrived in Barbados but the International superstar Rihanna. Coincidence? I rather think not! I feel she stalking me but for what purposes I aint sure yet.

Anyway I went to watch game 6 of the NBA finals at Bubbas last Tuesday and Bubbas get a fail from me. I was all set to say service in Barbados improving and actually in general the NISE initiative like um wukkin a bit but the Bubbas people unfair me. True I show up near to starting time for the game and the place was near ram pack but de hostess say dem had space showed us to a table wid chairs (the chairs part is important) and then as soon as we get dey they move the table widout the chairs and left we deyso standing up fa 10 minutes by a table wid no chairs looking fa chairs and dey coming back talking bout chairs real scarce. wha de rass! Wunnah tek the chairs associated wid de table wunnah tek we to, move the table minus chairs an den leff we lookin like poppits. Dat is not right. Wunnah aint gettin my money I went sumplace else meaning Lucky Horseshoe cause dem had both tables and chairs alright. I doan like to call nuhbody out but y'all was wrong Bubbas. Dun.

So yes I went to Bubbas game 6 and who should show up at Game 7 (probably looking fa me) at the said same Bubbas. Yes Rihanna (bet she aint had nuh chair issue though). Coincidence? I think not. I tell ya the woman after me. I gotta go back and read all dem articles I write bout she over the past couple a years and find out if I write something offensive cause she got some big able body guards and I aint want them to come an Chris Brown me. Oh wait was that reference too soon? My bad! Should have held that one back right? Whoops sorry Rhi Rhi. Look I might have to disappear fa true.

Dem was also debating in the Parliament bout some nice land that the government wanta gi to Rihanna fa free. Is how come nuhbody never offer me nor nun a de other bloggers land fa free. We duz promote Bim too ya kno. How come we cann get nuh land. An wha wunnah mean by the only land wunnah bloggers so looking to get is a 8x10 at Dodds? Hmmm

Anyways since I getting myself in trouble wid everybody in Bim (oh and sorry BR was hiding out so didnt give ya a ding. Ya can cuss me but ya gotta get in line) I wanted to say that I was a little surprised by all the publicity that Rihanna going to Bubbas to watch a finals basketball game got. I mean seriously people and I mean you The Nation, wunnah write a bigger article bout Rihanna watching the game, two big long pages in the print version wid numerous photos, dan wunnah write bout the actual outcome of the game (1/2 page one photo). Wha kinda tabloid-ism foolisness that is though? Wunnah really gine to the dogs fa true. I wud expect that sorta thing from the Stars and Inquirers of the world but wunnah supposed to a serious newspaper man. shame on wunnah!

G20

So the G20 meetings coming to Toronto in a couple a weeks and all the big boys gine be in town: Obama, Sarkozy etc etc. And yes I using etc etc cause I doan really know nuhbody else name besides Harper the Canadian PM ok. Doan confuse me like allya know wha the man in Russia and the man in China name.Oh yea I almost faget Germany got a woman an she name Mertle or Merkle something so.

Anyways well looka I dont know why they bringing this G20 thing to Toronto for. We aint ask fa um cause from looking at these previous meetings um look like utter chaos and confusion duz follow this gathering wid all sorta anarchists mashing up people city and burning fires and pelting big rocks at Police. Juss go pun youtube an look up video from previous G20 summits and tell me if it doan look like armegeddon decend pun the people streets, cuhdear. Why dem had to bring dat hayso to offset we city fa?

And when ya hear the shout this thing gine done an all dem heads a government gine be long gone home an we de poor citizens hayso gine gotta clean up all the mess that dem cause. That to me is bare lawlessness.

The other thing is that all a sudden ya hear G20 summit and the Canadian governments got money to spend. Almost $2 Billion dem spending so far they say. That is nuff noughts ya kno!

Yet before this ya shud hear how dem big boys in Parliament crying poor and telling people doan ask dem fa nuh money cause is a recession and money tight and scarce. Now all a sudden G20 an bram! coffers open wide and money cann dun spending on all sorts a stupidness fa this conference.

Speaking a stupidness, dem even building a fake lake down by the CNE for picture taking by the delegates. If ya doan know why this is a big pappy show ie bare fooolishness well all ya have to consider is that the CNE and the place where the conference holding is literally a stones throw from a natural lake, Lake Ontario, yet dese people spending money to mek a fake lake. Imagine that! Wha to me dat is worse dan how some people duz spend good money to buy up bottle water fa dem house when de taps could gi ya all the water ya cud eva want. chupse.

And money spending like water howyamean. This G20 aint easy at all. The people building big big fence in downtown Toronto to keep people in or out of certain areas and gine got all sorta soldiers and policemen manning this thing. Plus downtown dem tekkin up everything that aint bolted down cause dem frighten that the protesters come in an mash up the place. Even businesses telling dem staff amm looka wunnah might gotta tek a day off or wuk from home. Dat is how dread this thing is. Is like hurricane widout de rain and that aint nuh joke cause I sure before that G20 week dun out I gine look pun tv an see pieca galvanise flying through the air downtown.

Anyways like I said money money money spending on this thing which is really a shame cause when now after this ya hear something as simple as the school board need a few thousand dollars to keep a swimming pool open or the TTC scrunting fa ll cash as usual ya gine hear these self same politicians crying poor again and teling we to be self sufficient or raise taxes.

Oh well all I can do is hope an pray that muh workplace doan get burn down by these mad head people cause doan get me started on these protesters. Wha dem duz be protesting doah? Cause to me it duz juss look like an excuse fa lawless mob mentality behavior to tek place when these summits bout cause dem protests doan do nuttin but mash up the place, brek bare glass bottle, throw bare big rocks an cause de small man heartache.

Anyways I hope nuhbody doan lose duh life and I hope that the people that gotta wuk down in dat zone where all the confusion happening doan get caught up in this lawlessness and cause innocent people injury. That is that. The PM and he peole saying it gine put Toronto pun the world map, that is all well said but is worh being on the world map if ya city in ruins? Chupse, these people duz tire me ya!

Jesus walks

"We got a raghead in Washington [referring to Obama]," Knotts said. "We don't need another raghead in the governor's mansion." Original Story: Knotts Calls Haley, Obama Ragheads

Raghead is a slur which refers to Arabs or Indian Sikhs who wear traditional headdresses.

Knotts was directly referring to Haley, whose parents are immigrants from India. Haley, a state representative also is from Lexington County, has said numerous times that she is a practicing Methodist.

Knotts believes Haley is not Christian, and that she is saying she is for political reasons.

I always find two things funny bout these socalled white "christian" people in North America eh. The first is related specifically to the wuns in the US. Why is it that they feel that everybody that run for some sorta political office got to be christian? Like if ya is from anudda religion ya cant be as good at running a country or a city or whatever organization cause supposedly ya have different values etc and will destroy the American way of life. Like being muslim or some other religion automatically makes you a worse person than they are. To me that is laughable.

And the second one and this applies to all all the white so called Christians in North America is that they duz assume that once ya got lil color in ya skin or lil accent or a name that they have trouble pronouncing ya cant be Christian or ya cant have grown up Christian ya wudd had to convert at some point later in life. Who fool these people or dem just fall victim to the fraud wid all them Europeanized pictures a Jesus and feel that them is the only ones that can call demselves Christian. I feel dat is why ya duz find churches so segregated up hayso in North America. chupse, dese people duz mek ya sick.

Once bitten

I received an email last night informing me about the testing of the new FM station CARN 98.7 FM here in Toronto. Strange name I thought, is that short for carnies or Carnival, I'm assuming the latter. The email went on to state "CARN is aimed at servicing Toronto’s vibrant Black and Caribbean population in the Greater Toronto Area and surrounding environs."

Now not to heap scorn on CARN and its developers, props to you all cause it sounds like it wasn't an easy road to get on the air but I will readily admit that I am a bit skeptical about any new station purporting to be aimed at the Black and Caribbean population of the GTA. Why you ask? Well once bitten twice shy is what I would say.

Way way back in the day about 10-15 years ago when mi hair was still black, full n lucious and mi knee bones din used to mek noise when I walk and I was still in University all we had in Toronto to listen to black and Caribbean music was a few specific shows usually early, early in the morning or late late at night on the local college community radio stations. Big up CIUT, CKLN and CHRY, the one at York that nuhbody east of the DVP can pick up clearly at all. We also had WBLK out of Buffalo which was our defacto rnb, mainstream hip hop station.

Along came an enterprising businessman who fought with the CRTC (Canadian Radio Television Commission) and with great support from the entire black and Caribbean community of the day won the rights to have our first ever Urban station in Toronto. Horns blew, trumpets sounded, high fives were exchanged etc. Finally we thought, 24-7 music from all over piped into the diaspora. Calypso, reggae, african riddims, zouk in abundance! Yipee, hurrah, huzzah etc etc etc.

The station FLOW 93 point something started off in fine fashion. In the early days it was living up to what we thought it was going to be. We was getting calypso, dancehall, reggae, zouk, all sorts of African tunes, real hip hop, nice r n b and all was well with the world. Almost had me believing that "If you believe it you could achieve it." Cue the R.Kelly why dontcha.

And then like so many dreams and schemes from entrepreneurs and businessmen who are quite like politicians in their own right, the dream turn sour. I remember one trip from downtown to Scarborough spent listening to Flow where I heard the same three or four rnb top forty songs about three times in the space of a 40 minute journey. And FLOW has since been like that continuously. Calypso and dancehall once again relegated, not a peep of african music and nothing but girbage (that is gibbrish mixed with garbage, I juss mek dat up add it to de lexicon) pumped steadily. Pure payola top 40 radio type crap.

So when I hear about CARN 98.7 like I said sorry I don't mean to be harsh but I think back to the days when Flow was supposed to be doing what CARN say they going do and to how my youthful idealism soon got crushed by the reality that this radio station thing ain't about no love of community is about getting that cash. How long before CARN becomes Flow Too. hmmmm

Faux Pas?

Disclaimer: I aint claiming to have nuh fashion sense ya hear and disclaimer two I aint got nuh problem wid people an hair cause I got hair too but if ya did see wha I see at lunchtime today ya wud be saying de same ting I sayin now.

Walking down the road at lunch I see this young girl pushing a bicycle on the sidewalk. From the time I look pun she I say something wrong but is only on second glance that I realize wha the issue was. See the woman was wearing a t-shirt and a pair a dem three quarter pants dat de women duz wear I think wunnah duz call dem capris or something so.

Anyways see my girl, her arms and legs expose and her arms smooth smooth and hairless and the woman legs hairy hairy looking like she in need of an afro comb or like she is part hobbit.

Now like I say the issue din that she hairy, if she hairy she hairy I aint got nuh problem wid dat more power to she fa not conforming to the norms an ting so. No the issue was that she legs hairy and she wearing elf boots mekkin um worse and then in complete contrast to that she arms bare bare bare like the neck on a bare neck chicken, not a hair at all at all. Um was like somebody glue one body torso pun a different body else legs. Now I aint no fashionista but dat look like a fashion faux pas to me.

He aint dead

....yet!

Wuhloss! The Barbados Prime Minister, the right honorable David Thompson is sick. So much so that he is currently in North America seeking treatment for his ailment and has left the country in the capable hands of his deputies and parliamentarians. I wish him much better and gine say a prayer fa he.

Saturday evening, I chilling at the return of a somewhat watered down Barbados on the Water (yes um wasnt as good as previous years I says so) when all a sudden my cell phone beep.
"Whichpart you is?"
I still down hayso at Barbados on the Water.
"You hear anything?"
Anything bout wha?
"Somebody from Barbados juss ring me an tell me that David Thompson dead."
Whoa! My heart skipped a beat for a minute. Imagine the man dead the same day all we Toronto bajans down hay at the Harbourfront celebrating Barbados doah. Cuhdear!
"Naa I aint hear nuttin so"

And it proved just to be another false rumor thankfully but one that apparently was making its rounds bout de place as I noted from a few internet searches later that evening.

All I have to say is cuhdear why wunnah trying to kill poor David fa? He do wunnah someting dat wunnah wanta see he dead off? Cuhdear nuh! That is typical of a lot of we Bajan and by extension West Indian people once dem hear somebody sick doah ya know. We duz revel in killing people before dem time and speculating bout what u is dem got.

I mean de man say he sick, we see dat he loss some weight and he say he gine New York fa tests and evabody got a say and opinion now. Bout the place ya hearing that he got evating from Leptospirosis to strictsha to goadies. (I gine gi wunnah $5 if wunnah kno wha strictsha is, if ya living in Barbados now ya disqualified from entering doah)

And is not only bajan people speculating and rumor mongering too ya kno cause last week my wife come home and tell she dat one Trini woman say she hear he suffering wid such n such to which I had to ask my wife but wait how this woman know suh good unless somebody from TnT gi um ta he. And den I wud gotta start wondering why de Trickidadians like dem trying to get ridda we head a state.

But I aint kno wha wrong wid des wufless people. The man sick yes but why wunnah got to be killing he off. All a we aint gine dead in due course nuh. Chupse. Looka leff Mr Thompson whapart he is ya.

And when people sick try an pray fa duh instead a trying to play Dr House and speculate pun wha um is dem got an wha um is dem doan got.

ps: as ya can see from the sidebar ya can follow Doan Mind Me on facebook. I aint suh sure how um duz work and wha all this following ting is yet but keep that in mind cause um like um would tell ya when I post an such.

Postpone??

Not sure who's following the crazy situation in Jamaica at the moment and I hope all my Jamaican bloggers and commentators stay safe.

Now I dont have any other info on whats happening there at the moment but reading through the articles on the Jamaica Gleaner website this one sort of caught my eye.

While Education Minister Andrew Holness and his technocrats were busy yesterday with the technicalities of easing disruptions to the sitting of external examinations because of the violence in Kingston, there were hundreds of students living the reality.

For these students, struggling to get to an examination centre - possibly at institutions they had never before visited in their lives - was the easy part.

Sitting an external exam while gunfire echoed was much more difficult.

"We heard a lot of guns barking, and every time I hear them, I jumped," said one student of the Convent of Mercy (Alpha) Academy yesterday.

She was among a group of sixth-form students who sat a Caribbean Advanced Proficiency Examination (CAPE) yesterday morning.

While the exam was in progress, gunmen and police engaged in a more-than-hour-long gun battle metres away.

Hmmmmm

Ya mean to say nuhbody couldn't cancel these exams? I would give GCE and A level a blige but CAPE is a Caribbean exam thing. Ya mean they couldn't say ease the children instead of having them run through dangerous situations to go sit an exam? Cuhdear! And who can concentrate on an exam when gunshots lashing all round the place an ya not even sure ya can mek it home or ya gine have a home to mek it back to when all said n done?

Looka exams duz be hard enough as it is under normal situations but then to be doing exams in what for all intents and purposes is a war zone. You expect dem children remember anything them learn or read in a book when two gunshots let off and dem jump? How is this a fair test anyways unless ya preparing them to go to University in Afghanistan or Iraq.

Come on now, no matter external or not these exams could have been postponed cause this goes way beyond unusual circumstance and it really not fair to these young people. Even if ya tekkin it into consideration when ya marking the exam this still not right. The exams shoulda postpone till the shooting stop and things better. This is really a dumb move on behalf of the people that running this show.

Exposed

I just love this story.

I'll give you the basic details. Woman is cheating on husband and is found out when her private cell phone listed in her maiden name was added to the household "bundle" so that all their services from Rogers cable came on one bill. The husband was able to see her cell phone calls on the bill and figured out that she was cheating on him which her cheating partner readily admitted to the husband. Husband leaves marriage. The end.

Except its not. Woman is upset cause she thinks the Cell provider did her wrong by bundling her cell phone with the home stuff and is now suing them for about 1/2 million dollars. Actually to be honest I think she has a point and may win but still..........

Well well well aint she brazen though? I mean imagine she horning the poor man an get ketch and she vex now and want to sue the phone company. She aint have no shame though? Looka what the world come to when these sort a people can cheat an get on so and dont have no shame at all. Imagine that.

But I'm also looking at this from another perspective. If I'm working in marketing for one of the other rival cell providers like Telus or Bell this is gold, jerry gold. I mean lets face it those Rogers ads with the dude who cant get cell reception cause his carrier isnt Rogers and the other ones with the guy who cant get HD tv cause his cable isnt with Rogers are pretty good digs at the competition so here is their chance to get back at Rogers.

If I'm in marketing at Telus or Bell I'm signing ol cheating girl to a contract and building a series of ads around her and this situation. Something like "Bell at least we wont bundle your ish without your permission" or "Telus so you can always keep your downlow on the downlow." or "Bell cause ya husband dont need to know about ya outside man"

Trust me like I said the situation is gold, I got a whole campaign mapped out but I not giving it to them fa free on my blog. Is mad ya think I mad? No star if they want it call me an we cud work a ting but I doan want the wife find out. Oh shoot mi phone bundle I gine an switch to Bell or Telus. :-)

Mother of the year

So Saturday at the supermarket, I'm pushing our shopping cart merrily down the aisles when I see this lady with two kids. One around 3-4 and the other around possibly 5 or 6. The 3 year old is perched on the front of the trolley, not exactly safe, and falls off leading to a cacophony of noise which is par for the course for a three year old mind you.

Still it is as I watch the mother go to pick up the three year old that I catch a glimpse of something that almost makes me jump. No it cant be! Yep, the 6 year old has a knife in his hand. What da??

Ok now granted on closer inspection it wasn't a real knife but it was still a toy knife about 12 inches long and it looked pretty real from a distance and even from close up cause I wasn't the only one that reacted the way I did as I saw a couple of other cats jump when they first noticed the knife. It looked like it might still be able to do some damage even if it was just plastic painted to look real to be honest.

Now from the looks of the fancy handle it looks like it belongs to some sort of role playing game or something. I have no idea what kids games have realistic knives as part of their ensemble but yea it was a toy.

Anyways I pointed it out to my wife who while agreeing with me that it was wrong said its the same thing as kids playing with toy guns. I'm not sure I agree here. While I'm anti-gun for kids toys, I think playing with a plastic colorful clearly not real, water spewing gun in the backyard is a bit different from walking around with a realistic looking 12 inch blade in a crowded supermarket. Does it have the same effect on the kids? Hmm possibly but my feeling isn't that strong so I can be swayed if you think both are equally wrong.

Still I really had to bite my tongue from not saying anything as this chile palance up and down the people supermarket with this fake weapon and I was just thinking what type of mother allows their child to play with such a thing for one and t make it even worse play with it in such a public place. Wow!

Subway mugging

Ok I dont usually write this late at night or with music (Guru (RIP) tribute mix from Dj MK in the background) but I've wanted to speak on this issue for about the last 5 days.

Last weekend a 79 year old man was robbed on the Subway here in Toronto. It wasnt like he was in an empty subway car when it happened though as he cried for help from some 20 or so fellow passengers who did nothing to assist this senior citizen. True the assailants timed their crime with precision so that they were able to run away just as the train pulled into the station but still the fact that no one as much as helped is kind of disturbing on many level.

Its a sad story and one that has prompted much conversation and well warranted criticism of Torontonians.

Still from my perspective I'm like who are all these people who are complaining about the actions of Torontonians and have they ever sat on a TTC subway car? I mean seriously why is the fact that no one tried to help this victim surprising? I take the TTC every day to work and I'm not surprised at all. Disturbed by it yes but definetly not surprised.

Ok, I'll give you that its the wrong type of behavior and in a society such as ours we should demand better and it is shameful but still that it actually happened is not surprising to me. This is Toronto, these are your typical TTC riders.

Look the fact is most people on the TTC dont really want to be there. This is indisputable. Yes you have your greenie, environmental types who think that taking the subway is saving the earth from the excess greenhouse gases of the gas guzzling personal vehicles but they are a minority.

The majority of persons are on the subway because its their most affordable way to travel. They either have no other option for getting to work meaning no car or cant afford to pay the exorbitant costs of downtown parking. They are (and I include myself here) praying for the trip to be over as quickly as possible and trying as much as possible to create a fantasy world around themselves to drown out the low whine of the overly loud teenagers mp3 player or the stench of the folks who threw on perfume but forgot to shower that morning, or to pretend that the lack of personal space as they are squeezed in next to strangers isnt really happening .

They are aware but still not really aware of whats going on around them to the extent that they're going to jump up in a flash and play hero for a stranger cause their whole mindstate is one of avoidance. Avoid staring at the strangers, avoid listening to random conversations, avoid touching anyone by accident, avoid offending anyone or bumping into anyone or eye contact for more than a second or stepping on someone's foot and just avoid any and all interaction that could possibly occur.

Its like if they had the power to generate personal force fields they would but they cant so they instead read the newspaper or sleep or stare off into space or down out their surroundings with music or do other personal task that they can do to forget where they are and let the trip time fly by.

That's the simple truth and thats why no one helped old dude. Folks were probably blissfully unaware of what was happening, caught up in their own worlds until the last minute or were in their avoidance mode and just couldn't get going in time to help him.

So lets not act surprised. Judge all you want, its bad, it should be so but dont be surprised. Its horrible and says something about mankind yes but it is what happens in this society so dont make me laugh with your shock. All your shock tells me is that you're not a regular rider cause if you were you'd see it as pretty much par for the course.

Sad, disturbing, shameful yes, surprising naa not even a little bit.

Own country

A few years back I remember blogging about how the airport is a country unto itself cause once you step onto the airport premises they duz feel that dey could charge you the most outrageous prices for any and everything under the sun. Well the same thing pertains to the movie cinema.

Friday night, straight from work, I decide I going to see The Losers. Its like the A-team with more black people, and all in all wasnt a bad movie (I'm predicting it will be better than the actual A-team movie later this summer) except the ending was a bit disappointing, lame and presumptuous too cause they clearly assuming that they mekkin a sequel and from the paltry number of people in the movie cinema I'd say the likelihood of that is about zero.

Now I know the prices at the cinema duz be mad so usually I duz eat before I step foot in dem people place but this time I was a bit pressed for time so I went in there kinda hungry but figured I could last out til after the movie.

Waiting in line though, I really start feeling a lil peckish so I say let me go buy a lil pieca candy from the concession stand (M&Ms if wunnah really wanta know) before I go in the cinema. So I step to the concession stand, a bag of M&Ms is like 4 dollars or about 2.5 times what they usually cost outside but whatever I gine get these to hold me over cause the popcorn starting near 5 dollars and I cud really do widout all dat salt anyways.

So the staff member pull out the M&Ms and look at me and say would you like a combo wid dat. So I think to mysef well maybe a combo wid a drink might not be so bad cause I thinking like how the fast food people duz gi ya a combo and then basically if ya buy the drink, burger and the fries it duz be cheaper than just buying the drink and the burger alone so ya getting a deal basically. Aint that the whole premise of combo?

So I ask the fella so hummuch is the combo. Hear he now, well you can add a drink and a popcorn and it will be only $15 dollars.

Only Fifteen who?? Wha the whole movie was only $10.25!! Which part of 4 dollars he feel I gine upgrade to a whole other 11 dollars extra to gi he 15 dollars for a drink and popcorn. Wha dat is sheer madness den. Chupse. Wha dat cant be nuh sorta deal, how a popcorn, drink and candy could cost you 15 dollars unless we stop dealing in Canadian dollars and dealing in some sort of devalued currency now.

Wha I cann understand dese people. Wha nuh wonder people duz gotta sneak food in the movie cause these fellas trying to juk out ya eye wid dem prices. As it was I thought the 4 dollars fa the candy was outrageous and swear neva again but 15 dollars wuhloss man, you know hummuch orville redenbocker popcorn I cud get fa 15 dollars? Nuff man nuff!

No star, I tell he no to the combo offer cause I aint buying nuttin more in movie land. These people and dem combos too cruel fa me. Wuhloss!

Money talks Bjerkhamn walks

I've been following this story in Barbados for the past week or so.

The synopsis is as follows:
Father, Jonas Bjerkham, accidentally shoots himself and his 11 year old son while cleaning gun. Son dies, father is in hospital for injury to his hand and is said to be distraught. Police wish to speak to father, father lawyers up and his lawyer and doctors say he's in no shape to speak to police. Police have him under close watch, escort him to and from the funeral last week and then yesterday somehow amazingly father manages to get out of the island via his private plane. Hmmm.

Well all I can say is that this is another example of one law for the poor and another for the rich which is not just something that happens in Barbados or other small countries cause I could cite the Jaffer case here in Toronto as a recent example as well (google Rahim Jaffer if you're interested).

Now regarding this incident in Barbados, I cant speak to the actual validity of the story of the incident but its still seems a bit sketchy since the father was apparently a gun dealer and well a dude who knew a lot about firearms so you would think he'd know better than to clean his gun when its still loaded with live ammo. However stranger things have happened.

Then there is the kids gloves with which the Royal Barbados Police Force (RBPF) has treated Mr Bjerkhamn. Granted allegedly accidentally shooting ones own child has got to be a rather jarring and tragic experience so some leeway is expected in dealing with the father/shooter so the RBPF can't be totally blamed for showing some compassion and giving Mr Bjerkham time to deal with his grief but at the same time in hindsight clearly he was stalling.

Now one wonders what the police response would have been if Mr Bjerkham was not the scion of a wealthy family. Were it someone like me, god forbid, would I be given the time to grieve, would I have been able to get my doctors to say I'm in no shape to speak to police or to have the RBPF actually obey those doctors orders? Ummm. Would I have been in police custody or have guards at my hospital rooms doors until I was fit to give an account of the incident to police? Would they not have taken my passport and hey I don't even own a private jet yet. (a brother has to have goals right?) You tell me.

And what does Mr Bjerkham fleeing the country under the claim of seeking medical treatment in the US say about his innocence or guilt? I mean there was much sympathy for his dilemma, before he willingly left the country without notifying the police of his intent to leave. This sympathy has now all but evaporated as the citizens clamor for justice and wonder why the rules only seem to apply to those who aren't connected or who aren't rich. Cant blame them can you?

It just sort of hits the average man as a double standard when they realize that innocent or guilty they could not treat the local constabulary with the sort of disdain that Bjerkham and his handlers have and get away seemingly scotch free.

And after events like this we still wonder why the youth in the country don't respect authority.

But who knows maybe I read too much into things. Maybe Bjerkhamn will come back. I'm not holding my breath on it but maybe he will. Still even if that does occur he has clearly shown yet again that someone of his class doesn't need to follow the rules. Money and status talks dudes like Bjerkhamn walk.

But hey we all knew that already right.

gun play?

So some of you may know that I have a 4 year old at home. Dont worry I wont get all cute and cuddly (not that I know how to) regaling you with kid do the funniest things stories just yet. Not really in my character actually.

But sometime after Jdid Jr was born I signed up for this email update from this site which gives you info on certain milestones, expected behaviors at what ages etc. They send weekly updates and bad parent that I am, I maybe read like one in four since I not really sure what I can do or whether I'd really be pushing him to make all the milestones if he's not there already cause in my opinion children all develop at different rates. Still the emails are interesting sometimes especially when they do correspond to some new quirk that Jr has developed in his personality.

Anyways this week they sent me an email which I scanned about four year old behavior. The last paragraph read

"And now that your child is becoming ever more social, it's important to check in with the parents of his playdates to make sure that any guns they have at their home are locked up at all times. You may choose not to let him play at houses where weapons are stored, even if they are in a safe. And, of course, if your family has guns, you'll want to be equally sure that they're always locked away."

Boy all I could do was laugh. I know one of you will say is a sign of the times but I'm here waiting to see if next week's update says something like and its important to make sure that the parents of his playdates dont smoke crack. If they do freebase you might choose not to let him go over to their crack house.

lawd a mercy!

So what

ok I trying to not just blog about celebrity things but I couldnt resist this one here.

The big news lately is about Sandra Bullock who just won a big Oscar and how her husband was cheating on her with some tattooed floozy.

Now I understand why its fairly big news but at the same time why are we acting all shocked here? Is it because she's famous and accomplished and we don't think guys cheat on famous and accomplished women? Cause I'm sure Halle Berry and Hillary Clinton would say umm wait a minute now.

And look at the dude. I mean the revelation that Tiger Woods cheated was shocking given his prior clean cut image but Sandra bullock's husband doesn't have that image. I mean the dude's name is Jesse James, you know like the famous outlaw who he claims to be family to. Dude looks like a thug not that thugs all cheat or anything but he looks like the type of cat that a woman's mother would tell her to stay away from cause he aint no good.

Then dude has been married twice and one of his former wives was a porn star. How many decent dudes you know that will marry a porn star? They may mess around with one if given the chance but marry umm no. Now I don't know bout you but this image of Jesse James doan say choir boy to me. So why the shock?

Is it cause Sandra is America's sweetheart? And I never really got that whole title cause not to kick her when she's down but seriously she aint all that.

Twit!

I'm sorry but am I the only one a bit disturbed that an elected member of the Canadian Parliament was tweeting during question and answer session in the House of Commons yesterday?

Lisa Raitt seems to have found a cure for ministerial boredom in the House of Commons.

The labour minister announced on Twitter Wednesday that she would live tweet during question period, and proceeded to provide colour commentary - literally.

What the hell?

I mean seriously is this the sort of behavior that our elected officials should be engaging in during House sessions? Is our government one big joke? (Wait don't answer that one.)

Isn't this the political equivalent of doodling in class or hiding comics in your text book? Shouldn't you, our leaders be paying attention? Is running this country sooooo boring that you have to tweet?

And she's not even a backbencher. I could maybe just possibly forgive this act if she was a backbencher (actually I'd probably be pretty pissed then too) but she's a minister. The Minister of Labour for Pete's sake! Isnt that an important portfolio? Shouldn't she be paying attention during the question session? Good grief! When else does she tweet one wonders? During policy meetings?

Pay attention!

I mean given what sometimes passes for political discourse at some of these sessions I'm not surprised but damn at least pretend that you're sort of interested in what's going on and representing your constituents who I'm pretty sure didn't vote you in for your tweeting skills.

At least when I was messing around in class doodling I at least pretended that I was interested. This is just openly mocking us.

No disrespect to twitter, it serves its purpose (whatever that may be), and its cool to see politicians using the new media/social interaction stuff to reach the tech savvy crowd but there is a time and place for everything and in my opinion the House of Commons is definitely not the place to be tweeting about trivial stuff like what others are wearing unless you're working for fashion TV.

Stay focused man!

Seriously, its bad enough that Parliament was prorogued on a whim for like two months for no real reason but then you guys just come back and you are already tweeting? Way to take governing seriously! And to think that you politicos make the decisions that affect our lives? Wonder why our economy and societies are so messed up? Why its because our leaders are too busy twittering their lives away. Duhh! (OK that's probably not the main reason but still)

Damn damn damn!

Seriously I mean tweeting! Really! Really? Tweeting? Are you serious? Come on now.

Whats that phrase? Nero fiddles while Rome burns. Guess we need to update that to something about Raitt tweeting while Canada fumbles along.