Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Name that War

Back to this quest to oust Ghadafi and get our hands on his oil. I was wondering who duz name these wars and military operations for the US and NATO and them big fellas so? Cause I realize this little anti-Ghadafi thing that happening now name one Operation Odyssey Dawn which sounds all noble an ting like they pull it off a C.S Lewis book (Dawn Treader anyone) and I remember they had one in Afghanistan name Everlasting freedom or Enduring freedom or something so (which sound like a fella should stan up an salute) and we all remember the big one ...... Operation Desert Storm back in 1991. 

So I want to know who is the man dat duz name these wars? And is it possible that I can slip whoever hire him a resume cause I feeling ready for a career change and I think I could do a lil war naming meself.

Hear mi nuh. I would of course have to be true to my bajan an West Indian self cause we doan mince matters. All this subtlety and ting so in de war naming business dun way wid. We ain't coming wid nuh fancy names like we having a tea party or fete. Uh uh, this is serious business, so we calling it like it is.

So no more Odyssey Dawn an ting so to relax the bad boys. No it would be Operation "Liks like Cocoa bix" or Operation "We gine buss ya tail" or operation "Stan dey if you feel you is a badjohn" or operation "Bomb ya back to the 1800s" cause we aint trying to mek all dem despots and terrorists feel dem have a chance when this ting start at all. We letting them know from jump wha happening and we want them to be peeing their pants in dread of what coming next.  Looka is all part a de psychological warfare thing and could possibly save lives on both sides.

All dem terrorist and tyrant bad boy wud quake in fear. It would be like is wha de operation name again? Wha is dat? Dem change the name from Operation Essential Peace to wha? "Operation Liks like Peas" ?? Oh gosh boy! All dem foreign soldiers wud be laying down their arms like no man. I in the army an I was gine fight but I neva sign up fa nuh liks like peas nor nuttin so ya hear? Ah mean, ya cann really expect a man to fight on the wrong side in Operation "Liks gine share" No boy!  Looka we surrendering an gine back home.

Or well ah boy ya kno me an my men was planning a lil resistance ting fa true. Ya kno some bombs and rocks and anti-aircraft guns, a lil guerrilla tactic here an there an maybe throw in a few suicide bombers if I cud find a few foolishy foolishy people but ya kno when I hear dat de men name dis ting Operation "Wait you's a idiot or wha?" well star I immediately lost all hope for survival and decided to see if I could get my people to broker some sorta peace treaty quick quick.

So looka if any a ya know who I can get in touch wid to get a War naming job, lemma know cause I feel with my skillz and imagination I got this war naming thing down pat an I cud save nuff lives.


Guyana-Gyal said...

Pain. Sorrow. That is what all wars should be named.

chrome said...

Gaddafi the man and the leader is odious to say the least. more suspect is the attempt to oust him.

call it Operation Double Standards