Friday, September 26, 2008

PETA

In case you werent completetly convinced that PETA is run by a bunch of jackasses. Read here


If the well-meaning crusaders at PETA – People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals – were to pull off their latest publicity stunt, Ben & Jerry's ice cream parlours could end up being called Hooters.
That's because, this week, in a letter to company co-founders Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, PETA "urged" them to use human breast milk instead of cow's milk in their products.


Do I really need to point out why this makes no sense whatsoever?

Yea if I'm an animal I really really want these guys to be my advocates. But then again I guess PETA does do its job and make us feel sorry for the plight of animals. Poor animals cant even afford proper representation cause being represented by PETA is like some poor sap in court being represented by the pro bono lawyer who thinks legal briefs come in three packs from Fruit of the Looms. Cuhdear! Lets raise some funds so the animals can have proper representation and ditch these PETA bozos.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Caveat emptor

Agent: I know why we have reservations.

Jerry: I don't think you do. If you did, I'd have a car. See, you know how to
take the reservation, you just don't know how to *hold* the reservation and
that's really the most important part of the reservation, the holding. Anybody
can just take them.


The buyer is always right, well that is if he is a new customer.

Was reading Amadeo's blog about his dealings with Sprint and it got me thinking about the whole customer/ services seller relationship these days. (Pardon me if I've written about this before but its on my mind again.)

Everything these days in terms of service from companies is geared towards bringing in new customers. I see Banks giving away iPods to switch your accounts to them, phone companies throwing free phones at customers, credit card companies offering you low low low interest rates to join them, every single company these days its all about the new money.

Forget those cats who've been with your service for years, yea leave them there they are not the focus. Its like the accounting departments declared that company image and success is based on how many new customers they can get in a quarter. That not right man.

But what about those loyal customers? Its enough to give you that whole brother of the prodigal son feeling. "Wha I been here wid you fa donkey years and ya never even offer me two sweeties further less a free phone but ya can offer he cross deyso that was wid anudda carrier, rebates and bling and cheap cheap service. What am I chopped liver?"

I guess the theory is once they got you they got you and you're too much of a moron to think about switching services since its such a hassle and blah blah blah but shouldn't some thought be given into retaining clients?

Instead you duz gotta call and cuss, threaten to leave them or actually leave them. Then they duz be ringing down your house asking why you treat dem so and saying "sorry man, looka we got a special offer for you if you come back now we aint gine treat ya so bad nuhmore, looka hold this free installation, hookup, money back, coupons, bling, two shirley biscuits and a pack a tambrind balls."

No wonder the whole world economy getting mash up. Is cause of all this focus on the new clients I tell ya. They know how to get a new client they just don't know how to keep the one's they have happy. Or maybe they just don't give a .............

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Play ya position

Now I'll start with the disclaimer that I'm not the most adventurous cat out there. Wouldn't exactly say I'm conservative but I do know what fits me and what doesn't fit me. That doesn't mean I play into the stereotype where folks dictate what I can and cannot do, it just means I know what I'm comfortable with and what I'm not comfortable with.

I live by the edict that whats good for the goose sometimes just isn't good for the gander and the old bajan saying "follow pattern kill cadogan" read you don't have to do what everybody else is doing. This goes for if not all well certainly many aspects of life ...... including fashion.

Now I have, and I'm certain so have you, seen many larger women and wished that they would follow my edicts instead of trying to slip into clothing that clearly was made for women who don't have their girth. The innocent bystander drawn to these sometimes horrible spectacles usually watches or cringes while wondering why the person in question decided to leave their home in the outfit in question.

The answer is never simple. Some folks just don't know how to dress properly and some are looking for attention seem to be the common camps into which the answers fall.

That has become common place but what is also becoming more common place is older folks who try to dress up like in bajan parlance "young yams". Lawd ave mercy!

Now I'm not hating. I'm not saying dress like an old fogey. I'm just saying when you reach a certain age every new style is not for you. That don't mean start dressing like your grandmother or grandfather, that just means use common sense while picking an outfit.

I mean, I'm in my 30s and I'm graying, I cant go out there in an oversized t-shirt longer than some women's skirts looking like Solja Boy or one of these new age rappers. I also probably couldn't get away with wearing my hair in corn row, even if I found that style even mildly attractive, so I stick to the styles that I'm comfortable with, that fit me, (although truth be told I haven't grown that far out of my college mode of dress much to my wife's chagrin) that look decent on me without looking like I'm trying too hard to be cool. That doesn't mean I wont incorporate something new every now and then but it just has to fit with the overall me. It cant overwhelm the image.

Well I really wish other folks would do the same. One of the current styles with the women these days is those lacy tops. Now to be honest when this style first came out a few years ago I thought that a large number of women had lost their mind and were forgetting to put on the rest of their clothes cause I remember these lacy tops from when I was growing up and my mother used to call them half slips or something so and wear them under dresses and blouses and the like. They also resemble lingerie so I almost went up to a woman one time and say "girl you like you run out the man house suh quick ya faget ya blouse".

Alas that was not the case. It was/is a genuine style. I still think its better suited for the bedroom mind you but I accept that its the in thing with the young girls and its considered cute and hey if they want to tantalize me and give me a glance at their assets in their lingerie tops who am I to complain. Not me!

Actually lol, my only real complaint and it really isn't a complaint more a suggestion so the women wont embarrass themselves is if you going to wear these flimsy things on the road wear the right undergarments. Hey the fellas ain't going complain but at the same time some of you ain't looking exactly decent with some of the things ya wearing but then again if ya comfortable so be it.

But like I said when you reach a certain age that style isn't for you. Today in the mall I saw a lady in her 50s in one of these lingerie tops. Now the young girls can get away with it and look cute in some cases but when ya reach a certain age and certain things don't sit like they used to when you was in ya teens and 20s you duz juss look lawless or half senile when you walking bout wearing one of those flimsy things with bra straps flying all over the place like ya rush out the house half dress and forget to put on a blouse over that top.

That is all I got to say.

Monday, September 15, 2008

The Digits

Dont feel like writing at all but whatever.

Times change.

Growing up I was never one of those really cool guys. Hell I aint that cool now come to think of it. So when it came to the females it was always difficult for me to get in there and blow them away with my wit, cha-risma, personality and charm and the like since well I have/had none to speak of.

Plus the one thing about girls is that they always travelled in packs, still do come to think of it. Safety mechanism maybe but for a shy guy downright scary cause its hard enough for a self-conscious teenager to work up the courage to chat to a girl, he's interested in, one on one but to talk to her while her formidable entourage (which may or may not include one of two girls who positively hate you guts) listens as you stammer and stutter and try to come up with something cool to say that to the guy could be like police interrogation.

Cause you know regardless of how well you planned out the conversation in your head before hand someone would throw a wrench in the plan and it would take a turn you hadnt foreseen. drats!

So we guys initially operated on the predator - prey model. Separate and attack. It was like in those cop shows and being on a stakeout and then sighting the suspect entering the building. You spot the girl moving away from the crowd and "All squads move in now now now! "

But alas those opportunities were usually short lived as the pack or herd or entourage seemed to always sense your plan and would move in swiftly leaving a slightly tall, gangly yout at a loss for words with his brain screaming "disengage I repeat disengage and retreat. wha you waiting for boy run way nuh!" (ps i'm writing this in first and third person for a reason.)

So anyway after a while, surveillance and stake-outs leading to frustration (damn I/this person sounds like a stalker) the whole point of the stake-outs was drawn sharply in focus. What was the purpose? Duhh to get the girls of course, stay focused son but no I mean we did the stake-outs, the short chats but then what? How do we get those chats to lead to longer chats, leading to walks and dates etc etc especially in the face of the quarterback protection defense run by the entourage?

It was then that every boy came up with the idea of getting the digits. The phone numbers. Why? Cause getting a phone number was the easiest way to make progress with a girl in a one on one situation without major embrassment. Separated by distance in familiar surroundings, she couldnt see you sweating and sad but true you could prepare talking points on cue cards just in case your brain froze. (hey I didnt say I did specifically, I'm just saying you could ok now back off)

The Digits! Getting them wasnt easy either but a conniving yout could always fabricate some story as to why he needed them for legitimate homework purposes or the like. And if he was smart he could always parlay one girls digits into other girls digits. It was like hacking into the mainframe. Once you're in you theoretically could go anywhere on the system.

So he could do the friend thing with one girl who he wasn't interested in and hence was less liable to sweat and have brain freeze around and so coul easily get the digits and use her to slip into that network and get digits for the girls he actually was interested in. Its called subterfuge! Whoo hoo! I mean or so I've been told.

Anyway this post wasnt supposed to go like this at all. It was supposed to be about how back in the day you had to walk with pen and paper to write down the digits (see the movie The Wood) as opposed to today whre you just pull out the cell phone and instantly save those digits but the post got hijacked from word one what can I say.

Still, my personal favourite story (see now this is about me as opposed to the rest that was just sort of a general overview, yea thats it a general overview, nothing personal at all, zero percent) about the digits is this girl who once gave me the digits in her digits but gave them to me scrambled. Ya think I telling lies? Nope. The girl gave me the individual numbers and tell me to figure out the phone number. Hey it was better than giving me a false phone number. I think so anyways.

So see me going through all sorts of permutations and combinations and trying to solve this number. Jdiddy loves himself a challenge!

Ya know the funny thing. I actually got the number! Perseverance and a whole heap a wrong numbers!

Yea I'm a nerd. What son what!

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

This n That

I really dont have any coherent thoughts. Sleep deficiency and allergy season will do that to ya. So anyways

1) Tv's back. yipee! Think I'm going to like the new series Fringe!

2) The Conservatives are going to kick series ass this election in Canada. I'm calling it as they finally get their majority. The Liberals are dithering.

3) It was like something from out of a movie in my opinion. Woman shoots man and throws body from moving car on a crowded highway. Oh and of course there was the obligatory police chase afterwards. Damn T-Dot is getting real.

4) Doesn't it make you wonder about our leaders when election campaigns become contests between childish individuals with feigned reactions to comments taken out of context. Like Obama called folks bitter a few months back and we're still on that and he made this pig comment yesterday and thats going to be news forever. Just grow up and deal with the issues. Damn!

5) Kardi's new album is pretty nice. However I find he rhymes like a toned down version of dancehall's Dr. Evil (as opposed to Austin Powers Dr Evil) on that Dangerous track with Akon.

6) Speaking of Austin Power's Dr Evil. Why'd that dude have to wear a nehru jacket? I've got conspiracy theories about that. I will be starting a campaign to bring back the Shirt Jac! Folks are going whats a shirt jac? If you're from north america you probably wouldnt get it. and i'm too tired to explain.

7) I've got a 10 reason's Obama will not win the election idea rattling around in my head. #10 because non-Americans love him to death. #9 because this election isnt about the issues, #8 because he's muslim (or at least some american still think he is), #7 because he will be mauled to death by a pack of rabid hockey moms, #6 because Michelle is a black revolutionary (power to the people), #5 because he's elitist, ... well i'll leave the rest for now but you get the drift.

Sunday, September 07, 2008

Barack 2 de Future

That title catch allya right?

Well sorry to disappoint but this sentence isn't about neither him nor miss Palin fence or whatever she name cause like many people I well tired of the U.S elections.

So just to mock me the Canadian PM decide to call elections up here for October 14th. Chupse!

Look man I tired a all this politics. The problem with the U.S is that their election campaign duz last almost the length of the whole presidential term. I mean Caucuses and Primaries, secondaries, conventions, nomination speeches, delegates and super-delegates (which at first I thought was when somebody like Spider-man endorse ya) no wonder at the end they duz talk about electoral colleges cause this thing duz last so long that you could have a degree in politics by the time it finish.

Up here in Canada is different, is about a month of campaigning, and bram election. We election starting and ending quick quick all the while US people on CNN giving longwinded speeches still and the electorate getting bored, apethetic and tuning out.

The problem with elections up here though is even though they short in terms of the time scale, compared to the U.S, they happening way too often. Three elections in the last four years. Wha that dont even give the PM time to order new furnitures from IKEA to redecorate the office properly or unpack he files and shred the damning evidence he might have hidden in them.

And another thing I dont like is how come this current PM like to call elections right after holidays? Last election was just after Christmas 2006 and new years 2007, this one the day after thanksgiving. I think that is some sorta ploy he got to trick people. I feel like he think all we going be hungover or half drunk after the holiday and going look more favorably on him but I hope people realize that he trying to offset the holiday spirit with all this election talk. Oh well he'll probably win again anyways. We aphathetic cause too much elections just as bad as one long drawn out election plus none of them Canadian politicians as charismatic as Barack. Wha we would even be happy if they was as charismatic as McCain to tell the truth. Chupse!

Anyway Guyana Girl, one a me favourite blogs, nominate me for this thing hayso

Photobucket

I really not sure what it is but she write a few nice words bout me so I thankful and I say I going pass it on to somebody else.

The rules is as follows:

a.) Pick five (5) blogs that you consider deserve this award for their creativity, design, interesting material, and also for contributing to the blogging community, no matter what language.

(b.) Each award has to have the name of the author and also a link to his or her blog to be visited by everyone.

(c.) Each award winner has to show the award and put the name and link to the blog that has given her or him the award itself.

(d.) Award-winner and the one who has given the prize have to show the link of Arte y Pico blog, so everyone will know the origin of this award.

Okay, here I go:

1) Amadeo is one of my favorite bloggers. There is just something about the way he breaks down things that make me think of certain situations from a different perspective. Ya know like he will write something and you'll read it and think but wait that makes a lot of sense how come I never think of things like that before. Eye opening.

2)Pam Mordecai@Jahworld is another nice blogger. Deep, deep thoughts mostly from a literary perspective. Like I cant read her blog and be half into it. I have to give it my full attention. Plus she's from the T-dot so you know she has to get props.

3)This Vincy fella Will. I just discovered him a few months ago but I like his way with language. I duz read him and think sometimes boy I wish I could sway my words to do my bidding like that.

4) Mighty Afroditee is an interesting one. She has a way with the storytelling. Always making me smile. Hey storytelling aint easy ya kno? It tek a certain person to pull a proper story from a situation. Read the one about how she hasn't mastered the art of shoe throwing. I tell ya this young generation tisk tisk :-)

5)The Empress Ruthibelle. Well I only discover this one a month or two back too but I like it. Actually I think is only a few months old but I think this blog has loads of potential.

Dey say 5 so I going to just leave it there although ya kno that dont mean you cant stop by and visit perennial Jdid favourites like Melody and Kami and de Blogfadda Mad Bull.

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Palin punch

Before I start I'd just like to distance myself from the Obama campaign before he's forced to repudiate me and my comments.

Just watched Sarah Palin's speech at the Republican convention. Wasn't particularly impressed. Felt like she pandered a bit in the beginning with her whole this is my life segment. Here's my eldest son he's going off to Iraq to be shot at. Here's my baby with a disability which now makes me more in touch with all you folk with kids with diasabilities.

Seems like Obama was right and the Republicans are trying to make this more about personalities than about issues. She tried to attack Obama on some trivial stuff that he's been attacked on before, she didnt break new ground and with her Tina Fey look and those weak punchlines was it just me or was anyone else expecting her to break into "Live fom New York its Saturday night"?

Got to say though that this Palin pick is pretty crazy. I mean on the surface I thought they just wanted a female pick to offset Obama but Palin really? That was your best choice? Iwas thinking maybe they pulled the name out of a hat but then I thought if they did that her name should never even have been in the hat in the first place. I mean I'm never seen more dirt dished about a candidate in such a short space of time than with her. One can only wonder whats going to shake out of her closet when the researchers have more time to dig into her background.

The big issue has been her pregnant daughter. Now to me its really not that big a deal but then it is since she's the VP family values candidate of the Republicans and it really is hypocitical when you think of what the Republicans would have you think of the fact that Palin's 17 year old daughter is pregnant. Can you imagine what would be said if one of Obama's daughters was pregnant at 17 and how much flack he and Michelle would have gotten about that? Yea exactly! So why shouldnt Palin and her husband get flack now?

Still much props to the dude who knocked her up because he's soon going to be the most famous baby father in America. He needs some "Best baby fadda ina America" t-shirts made up cause K-Fed just got straight knocked out the box! Bloaaw!

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Fresh for 08

I was a terror since the public school era. - Biggie

Today is the end of summer or the first day of school depending on which way you see it. I was reminded of this from the time I got on the bus this morning and saw the high school neophytes with their faces filled with that mixture of eagerness and anxiety.

Apparently learning to keep your eyeballs to yourself and not stare at big people is a skill they teach in high school now cause one fresh yout was eyeballing me hard until I gave him my best old school Ice Cube look. That'll teach him. jdid doing his part for edumacation.

Anyway its so nice to see them before they get corrupted and become the loud, obnoxious terrors posing like they hard that they will be in two weeks time, slouched over the bus seats or with their bags riding next to them like they think their bags paid bus fare and I should stand up. You best to move that ish son!

I barely remember my first day of primary school or high school just odd stories from my mom about how I just took off and never looked back in both cases. I do remember my first day at University though and all the drama and trauma that it entailed: going to the Brunny(first and last time ever), really dumb ass initiation rituals, getting attacked by students from another faculty, etc etc but I wont recount it in detail because I just dont want to and to be honest after high school I really expected University students to act more like adults as opposed to alcoholic morons. University students adults ha! Shows how much I had to learn back then.

And I was 19 at the time so you can imagine what its like these days with Ontario churning out force ripe high school grads at the ripe old age of 17. Downright scary!

And you can see it on the faces of the frosh (freshmen) who I saw on the subway this morning. "Aint even lose their mother features" would be the phrase to best apply here. Clueless, wide-eyed, but maybe not so innocent. Think they know but really haven't the foggiest. Its a right of passage I guess but still you see these kids and really wonder was I ever that young? Well I know I wasn't that young in first year university but maybe I was that naive, that fresh faced, that whats the opposite of Jdid again?

Eventually it disappears. The weight of having to make adult decisions, living on your own, balancing a budget, the endless drudge of the commute, balancing school and work, the endless lectures about professionalism, pulling all-nighters to hand in, in the grand scheme of things, meaningless assignments that masquerade as important feats to be performed, etc slowly sucks away if not that youthful energy that young, fresh and green appearance.

They name it gaining experience and it is good to have to survive life but like every other situation where someone says its progress something had to be given up in order to make that progress. A so it a go!