Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Happy New Years

Just got back from Christmas in Barbados with lots to blog about but just wanted to wish all my fellow bloggers and all my readers Happy New Year. Wont get into any of the depresssing details of my 2008 and I am not making any resolutions but I hope personally I have a better year in 2009 and I wish you the same.

More Times!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Shoe Bush Duck

Ok besides the fact that Bush has some pretty good reflexes do you know what I noticed about this whole throw the shoes at Bush incident?

Where were the secret service dudes? Was that one who stood up about 20 seconds after the second shoe missed? Talk about reflexes! Dude was like oh there goes one shoe , oh there goes another ok i'll count to 10 and then stand up in case there is like a third shoe coming at him. What happened to protecting the president at all costs? Forget taking bullets ya mean a fellow wont even take a shoe for the president. Cuhdear

Friday, December 12, 2008

Secret Recipe

Four months after a Burger King employee lost his job for taking a bubble bath in a restaurant sink, three scantily clad teens were fired when they turned a basin at their northern California KFC into their personal hot tub.

They landed in hot water with the chicken chain's management when one of the bikini-clad dimwits made the same mistake as the Ohio Burger King employee - she posted photos of the dippy escapade on MySpace.

Every time I see an article like this one I duz have to laugh and say boy technology mekkin we stupider and stupider. I mean ok its dumb enough that they get in the people basin for one and its dumber that they took photos thereby creating evidence to their crime but posting the photos on the web? Now that has got to take the cake.

I wont argue that me or my generation didn't used to do stupidness cause that would be a lie but when we did do it most times we would keep it hush hush or if not at least we were wise enough to make sure there was no photo evidence so that if it got around it was someone else's word against yours.

Of course we didn't have access to all these technological advances, the cameras and the phone videos and iblackberrys and the myface and spacebooks and such but still I'm willing to bet we probably would have been a bit wiser about who knew what we were doing.

I frighten that we future going look like the one in that movie Idiocracy. Lord come fa ya world!

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Slow Down

After it happened for the umpteenth time this morning I figured I'd write about it.

Recently I wrote about parents who smoke while pushing infant strollers and those who push their strollers out into traffic assuming that everyone around them will stop. Well I've got another type of parent to complain about today: the parents driving their kids to daycare.

There is a daycare in my neighbourhood and every morning when I walk out to the bus I have to be doubly careful while crossing any streets (even or especially at traffic signals) because of the folk coming into the neighbourhood to drop off their kids who blatantly disobey the traffic rules.

Now you would assume parents driving their precious cargo to daycare would be careful conscientious drivers right? Nope! Many of them are full on road hogs or Nascar racers only concerned with making their pit stop as short as possible. I feel like if it was possible for them to drive by and somehow shoot the chile out the back window into a hammock at the daycare some of them would.

They will make their right turns at the crosswalk just as you are about to step into the street disobeying the stop signs and the fact that they don't have the right of way there. And don't ask how I know is parents doing the daycare thing that are the culprits cause I know the two or three times I almost get lik down at the traffic lights this year the culprits had a car seat in the back and turned into the the daycare cul-de-sac afterwards. Its terrible! And then another issue is them parking all willy nilly again ignoring rules in an effort to hustle their offspring into the daycare again with no disregard for other road and sidewalk users. Like during winter when the snow is piled up all along the roadway and they park at the only stop in the mountain of snow where a pedestrian can actually safely cross the street without walking through snow up to his kneecaps and they block your path with their vehicle as they hustle about their business. What you think the rest of us have time to wait on you because your task is that much more important than ours? Obey the rules man! Chupse!

But is the ones who drive through stop signs that annoy me the most cause that's illegal. Just cause you see another car ain't coming don't mean you can ignore stop or replace it with slow down because you haven't seen us on the sidewalk about to step out.

I think of giving them a few choice words too but I trying to respect the poor infants in the back seat so all I can do is silently mutter but one a dese days boy , one of these days.......

Monday, December 08, 2008


All since last week I start to believe there was a conspiracy underway. A plot to escape, make a Prison Break like Mike Scofield, on a show that realistically should have only lasted one season but I digress. I keep seeing clues, tips that the plot had passed the planning stage and was now well into the execution stage.

What I'm talking about is the great escape of the gloves. Give us us free!

Seriously since last week everywhere I go I keep seeing lone gloves in the snow or on a subway seat or on the stairs or just lying about somewhere and since I dont see Michael jackson anywhere in the glove vicinity I can only come to the conclusion that the gloves are escaping from human clutches. Its like the gloves have decided they fed up with protecting hands and they making a break for it this winter. Except only one fella like he can escape at a time and the other poor fella duz be left behind as the scapegoat to try to do the work of two men.

It reminds me of the great sock escape that occurs everytime I do laundry. I think that crew just get tired of my stinky feet and somewhere between the washer and dryer they make a break for it probably via some secret tunnel built into dryers that I am unaware of but whatever the case one leaves and I'm left with one sock which really isnt better than no sock at all unless unmatching socks suddenly becomes a new style. In which case I will a fashionista!

So I believe that some unsuspecting soul one day put the gloves in the sock drawer and that the gloves learn a new trick and drew inspiration from these wicked socks' quest and decided to use the same tactics to arrange their freedom. Some sort of operation 5 fingers in effect or something so.

Soon all we going have to be like little children and clip the gloves onto our jackets cause you never can tell when a courageous glove trooper will yell geronimo and make a break for it.

I personally blame this increase on glove escapees on the propaganda about glove martyrs receiving 20 new fingers to play with in glove heaven but whatever!

So I keeping a special eye out on my gloves to make sure they dont think to try nothing stupid this winter cause I watching them like a hawk. They aint getting away at all cause both my hands cold.

Friday, December 05, 2008


What do you mean prorogue is not what happens when perogies go bad? :-) Ok bad joke but whatever!

This week a coalition of heroes approached the Haitian seeing assistance in getting rid of their enemy, the one with the greatest power. Apparently the Haitian couldnt help.

Sounds like a scene from the show Heroes right? Alas it was a scene from Canadian politics as it played out this week with Dion, Duceppe and Layton playing the coalition, Governor General Michaƫlle Jean playing the Haitian (she is Haitian born after all right) and PM Harper playing the villain. Right now all we need is a solar eclipse and my analogy is complete.

In theory a coalition could work. If aliens from outer space landed and were running roughshod over the country perhaps a Liberal, a socialist and a separatist could put their differences aside and work together to defeat the alien overlords. A global economic crisis, however, is probably not enough for these three wildly divergent visions of Canada to gel.
That quote is from Rick Mercer. You can find his take on the situation here. Quite a good read.

Anyway in response to our current political crisis which I mentioned in my previous post yesterday the Governor General acting on the wishes of the current PM has prorogued parliament until the end of January. What that proroguing term mean, and I used to think it meant to be in favor of scoundrels although come to think of it you could still interpret it as such, is that parliament has been suspended. He who fights and runs away lives to fight another day I guess.

Doors lock, business aborted, wheel and come again if you please!

Now I'll be honest. At first when I heard that the Governor General was following the PM's suggestion I was vex. What kind of foolishness this woman doing I thought. But a few hours later I changed my mind. I think Madame Jean acted correctly and in the best interests of the Canadian people on this one.

Mind you it could and probably will still end badly but for now she basically saying cool your heels and lets see if we can settle this thing amicably or at least like sensible people with the welfare of the Canadian citizens at heart. So for that I commend her.

The problem is for all her good intentions she has probably just prolonged the inevitable; that being Canadians heading back to the polls early next year.

Lets examine the situation. As Mercer suggested there was no way a political coalition of those three parties survives long term, even short term its sketchy cause I'm sure its all smiles now but wait until Duceppe and Layton start flexing their muscles.

The other issue with the Liberal-NDP Bloc supported coalition is leadership and this is one of the reasons I think Jean did the right thing but we are headed back to elections. Stephane Dion by default is the leader of that coalition but Canadians have overwhelmingly rejected him as a leader. To even have him spend two days in the PM's chair is just ridiculous and a slap in the face to voters cause clearly thats not what they wanted. So a Dion led coalition is really not favorable.

And really he's not a strong leader. A coalition needs a strong leader to keep the divergent worldviews and minsets in check. You really think the PQ and NDP respect Dion? Nuh I doubt that.

And what was with that cheesy video they did in response to Harper's statement. As one news anchor quipped it looks like they shot it on a cellphone. Seriously if you want to bring your point of view to the people and cant find a proper camera to make a short speech telling us why you should be our next government then that really isnt a vote of confidence in your skills as leaders, managers or doers. It just says you're not ready yet. Silly silly silly on their part!

Then we come to the encumbant PM Harper. He started it all. Just couldnt play nice with his pals on the Hill. He is still PM but lets take a look at who was propping up his minority government in the face of opposition from the LIberals and NDP. Oh wait it was the Parti Quebecois who he just completely insulted over and over in his attempts to stop this coalition from happening. Does he think they'll support him now whe he's got crucial bills to pass? Nope so that means we'll have an ineffective minority goverment and nothing will get done. Just wonderful.

I could go on about the outcomes of any possible elections but all in all the verdict is that we here in Canada are faced with a political connundrum which we cannot really afford to have at this time and Canada could be poorly led for the forseeable future.

So much for first world status but then again I never drank the koolaid on that one.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008


You got to know when to hold em,
know when to fold em
know when to walk away
know when to run

the Gambler - Kenny Rogers

While allya was getting caught up in whether Obama was going to nominate Billary for Secretary of State and who and who and who was going to be in his cabinet (he name a Bajan Attorney General so respect due seen), this past week been pure bacchanal in Canadian Federal politics.

I know wunnah aint know bout that cause nuhbody don't really pay attention to Canadian politics even we living here in Canada but let me tell ya is pure drama we been having lately up here in Ottawa.

I had spoken about the election we had back in mid-October predicting, correctly I might add although even Stevie Wonder coulda see what was going to happen, that the Conservatives would win another minority government and then that was that. Back to the old status quo of quibbling in parliament and such until last week.

Now last week in Parliament, Prime Minister Harper and his finance people introduce a bill or something so and amongst the items on this thing was no bailout package for the auto industry (rightly so at this juncture in time until we see what the Americans do), a moratorium on striking for Federal employees and most explosively a proposal to get rid of all public funding for political parties given the economy right now.

Now alright that last one sound like a good plan given how brown things is these days but really what it was is Harper trying to downpress the opposition again cause the ruling party got nuff private sponsors and their coffers full but all the opposition parties scrunting especially since the last election caught them all napping. So passing this proposal would ruin the opposition and bolster the ruling party.

Well boy, Harper had played this one thinking it was a win win situation. Either the opposition agree to the proposal in which case they shooting off their own foot or they kick up fuss in which case he could either squeeze them into another election while making them seem like they selfish and self centered or he would remove that part of the proposal about the public funding at the last minute still leaving them with egg on their face looking self absorbed and selfish if they voted with him. Could not lose that play at all. Squeezed like when you play domino and any play you can make the other team win off. He had them between a rock and a hard place. Or so he though.

Well the opposition people get vex and I guess this was the last straw cause lets face it Harper been bullying the other parties since forever, playing a strategic game of chess to keep them in check every few moves. So they did what no one would ever think them capable of doing given their ideological differences. They came together and formed a coalition. NDP, and Liberals with the tacit support of the Bloc basically saying enough is enough , we taking back the government cause now we have a majority.

Wuhloss! So now we in a position where everybody scrambling now. Harper sweating bricks cause instead of having the opposition in check, the tables turn and they already tell the Governor General we ready to take over.

What gine happen next? Well they vote on this bill in parliament next week and all sorta outcomes could happen. New election, waste taxpayers money again, the GG could say tek the reins and Harper guhlong bout ya business or a number of other scenarios could play out.

All I know is that if the coalition get back in power Stephane Dion going to be Prime minister and this is a man that lost the elections worse than any Liberal leader since the 1800s and a man who was about to vacate the party leadership and walk into the sunset. Talk about upset and comeback! This would the political equivalent of Reggie Miller's 8 points in 6 seconds to win the game. From zero to hero (not that Reggie was ever a zero)!

But still a week or so left to see what going to happen. Lots of time so anything can happen. Meanwhile anti-perspirant and fans musse this years hot must have items for politicians in Ottawa cause the place hot like fyah!

What a la la!