Tuesday, December 19, 2006

Merry Christmas

and a happy new year to all. I'm taking a blog break for a while. Gone on vacation for a few. Hope all my readers and fellow bloggers have a blessed and safe holiday season. And yes I'm saying Merry Christmas and not happy holidays if ya offended go somewhere else.

oh and eat nuff nuff nuff cause well if ya dont put on weight in the Christmas season how can you make the new years resolution to lose weight? :-)

peace! (to all men and women too)

Sunday, December 17, 2006

Retreat

So I'm walking through the cosmetic department of a department store today when all of a sudden I realize not only are they not playing Christmas music but they are playing dancehall music. And not only are they playing dancehall music, which isn't such a big deal these days since BET and urban radio discovered Sean Paul and Elephant Man, but they are playing old dancehall music like early 90s dancehall music. Whoa!

Of course as I walked through irony of ironies what should be playing in the cosmetic department but Cutty Ranks lyrics of 'Retreat ugly gal surrender retreat pretty gal come fe tek ova". I wonder if anyone besides me noticed? Oh well.

Saturday, December 16, 2006

Charity

So its Christmas time, the time of giving and all that. Bah humbug! Just had to get that out of my system.

No seriously Christmas is a time for giving and I always remember even back home Christmas was when the Salvation army guys came out and set up shop on various corners of the city soliciting funds for the more needy. Nothing wrong with that.

Anyway I still see Salvation army folk up here in the T dot asking for funds for the less well off but Christmas in terms of collecting funds has become to me about the calls and the letters.

It seems as if when you give any donation to any charity they share your name with a million other charities who then proceed to attempt to solicit your help. Now in all fairness aint anything wrong with giving but if I'm giving 10 dollars here and there don't expect me to hoist every single charity on my back and give them 10 dollars because that money duz add up quicker than you think and in no time at all I would be one of those less fortunate, more needy, folks who need help as well. Ya understand?

So if I give to some children's thing or to help the homeless don't expect me to give to the Wild life fund and all the hospitals and the diabetes association and the cancer association and the prostrate cancer association and the save the planet fund and the adopt a starving child somewhere else in the world cause pretty soon my pockets would be bare and my child would be starving too.

Yea I know that's not what you want to hear. Its the season of giving so give selflessly. Well in my opinion selflessly can only go so far and sorry if that's not a very seasonal or Christian thing to say but its the truth. Ya got to give within your means same as you should spend within your means. That don't mean you cant be extra generous all I'm saying is you cant support every fella with a charity.

I'll help who I can but at the same time I aint saving no blind bats in Peru or hard of hearing owls in China. I might give something to a child fund here and there and a research foundation might get a one time thing but all animals got to break for themselves. When it come down to it I supporting starving people over animals any day. And also when it comes down to it I supporting people I know over people I don't know. If you live in east Mongolia I aint saying you don't deserve money but there is probably a poor fella in the Caribbean or a single mother with three kids in Toronto that I would give my money to first. Say what ya want about my rational and I realize the logic in a bit wrong but sorry that's the truth.

And another thing. In these letters I receive soliciting assistance why is it that the authors feel it is necessary to give me labels and calendars and pins and all sorts of memorabilia? Trust me that don't bribe me into giving anything cause the way I look at it its like so y'all want my money to buy knick knacks to give away to get other people money instead of giving the money directly to the actual cause that needs it. Sorry buddy that doesn't work for me.

Wednesday, December 13, 2006

Touch the sky

I guess when Kanye made that song he didnt realize that Touch the Sky was short for "Put your hands in the air, Touch the sky and give me all your money lol."

Yep the legendary Evil Knievel is suing Kanye over the Touch the Sky video. Cant blame him really after all its a crappy video and Kanye is an annoying arrogant s.o.b and in the video it wasnt too hard to figure out who he was impersonating. What I find funny though is that in Knievel's suit you would think that he (Kneivel) walked around with a halo on his head.

Knievel says in the suit "the “vulgar and offensive” images depicted in the video damage his reputation."

Ummm what reputation? Last I checked Mr Evil your name wasnt Pastor Kneivel, you werent a moral signpost for anyone, no one was hanging onto your words like a televangelist, you aint even made a stay in school special son. You were a madman jumping over obstacles in death defying stunts. Parents were like "boy you is a idiot or what! dont do that foolishness dat you see he doing on tv and go and pop ya neck. he head could only be bad trying to jump over a grand canyon. chupse!"

So how does this very tame video I might add ruin your reputation?

I mean if you dont like Pamela Anderson, Tracee Ellis Ross or Nia Long just come out and say so but dont make it seem like the video is something its not.

Its a cheesy video about a guy jumping over the grand canyon getting mad press while a couple of girls are on his jock (wait hold up does anyone use the phrase on your jock anymore or am I showing how un-hip I really am).

As an aside Kanye is one of the few guys who makes videos that actually turn me off from songs. The All Falls down video with Stacey Dash completely ruined that song for me. Ruined I say ruined!

But back to Knievel. If anything I'd be mad cause at the end of the video the Kanye Evil Knievel character crashes and burns in his stunt attempt but come on guy.

And the whole "and he uses my image to catapult himself on the public,” umm Dr umm Mr Evil Kanye was getting mad press before he used your image in his video. He aint no johnny come lately trying to use you to get some shine. Ever heard a little ditty called Jesus walks that was all over the radio 24-7 a few years ago. Yep that was him and umm your likeness aint nowhere in there.

Still like I said cant blame Mr Evil for the suit. He probably needs the cash and Kanye did use his likeness but lets not go overboard with the hyperbole about vulgar images now.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Public Service Announcement

Sigh! Just for the record its called a dress shirt not a button up.

Don't let Jay Z and a bunch of other stupid rappers steer you wrong! Think about it. If you're over the age of ten you grew up with your father, or your uncle wearing a dress shirt to work or church even if they only went for a funeral. None of this button up nonsense. That dude in the bank who used to cash your mom's cheques used to wear a dress shirt, the big office executive used to wear a dress shirt, nuh button up, probably one that was monogramed and he might have some nice cufflinks and that sort of business to look nice. Your grandfather used to wear one heavy with cassava starch to keep it looking sharp and wrinkle free. Nobody didn't want to look ruff dry, and check the link if ya not sure what I talking about when I say ruff dry. Look even you as a child had to put on one maybe with a little clip-on tie to wear to church so you know what I'm talking about. Dress shirt not button up.

Look button up is what you do to a dress shirt. Its an action or description for what is done to the shirt not the name for the shirt. I mean while its true we might call sweaters pullovers and I just alluded to the clip-on let those be the exceptions lets not change up the vocabulary with this button up nonsense.

I mean you don't hear anyone saying I put on a "throw over me head" or a "throw-over" when they are talking about t-shirts or vests do you? Or this morning when I was putting on my "one foot at a time" or "one foot" to describe putting on pants do you?

And what happen if you button your shirt from top to bottom? Doesn't that legitimately make a button up a button down?

Alright I've said my piece. Be forewarned. Dress shirt not button up.

Thank you!

and yes I do know that Button up is supposed to be only one type of dress shirt.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

5 things

I've been tagged. Not really a meme fan but I'm not really blogging much these days so here goes.

Five things you didn't know about me.
p.s: don't expect anything too deep.

1) I'm not one of those try everything once people. I'll try very specific things and if its something I actually find I like I really go all out to be better than mediocre in it. I despise mediocre.

2) I used to do spoken word poetry but I dislike, with very few exceptions, most spoken word poets. I find them too self righteous and most of their work is just way too performance driven anyways.

3) "I like to rock 100 miles but you know I'm far from running" - Showbiz on Maestro's Fine Tune the Mic. Just found out the clothing line isn't dead yet either so that made my day.

4) In another life I would/should have been a DJ. A good one too.

5) I'm seriously considering giving up blogging at the moment.

Not tagging anyone but if you feel the urge to do this. Go with it.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Weird

Ok besides talking to myself (and I mean full blown conversations like Eminem and Stan) there is also this weird bit I do to relax myself occasionally.

I start whistling or singing that silly 'These are a few of my favourite things' tune. Its not like I'm a Sound of Music fan or anything, actually despise the movie, but I think it started a few years ago and then I realized hey this tune is infectous and just by whistling it I can piss people off cause it gets into their head and then they too start to sing it. Oh alternatively I'll email some of my friends and be like I'm singing that Favourite things song again and start quoting the words and it gets into their heads too. I love that.

Oh and occasionally I remix it (hey they dont call me diddy for nothing lol). I've got a dancehall remix, an opera remix, a beatbox remix and my all time favorite a bajan remix sung in a totally off-key definitive bajan voice with words like 'when de dog bite ya, when de bee sting ya, when you feeling real real bad, i duz simply remember my favourite things an den i doan feel sooooooo sad'

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

mojo!

I haven't written much lately cause to be honest I've lost my writing mojo and its not groovy man. Word to Austin Powers! Just not feeling the vibe, what can I say.

Anyway much love to those who wished my happy birthday.

Also much love to the T-dot bloggers that I linked with on Friday night. It was nice to put faces to some of the bloggers whose sites I frequent. What can I say they are really nice folk (except fa dem Scarborough people. Boy I frighten fa them, just kidding), lots of fun too ....BUT the Toronto bloggers are so wrong!!! Oh gosh man I could tell you about the nice dinner and conversation and how everybody cool and that sort of business but no let me tell wunnah about Eduardo and Scott. Now Cranky already did a blog about those two and I aint trying to mash her corns or anything cause she did a good job but I felt I had to write about Eduardo and Scott from where I was sitting (which was the worse seat in the house for the show).

Look at this thing. We (the bloggers) meet up around 7-730 ish. Had dinner, passed on dessert and were handed the bill at 901 pm. The waiter was like "well look if wunnah aint having no dessert don't play wunnah sitting around liming up in my restaurant, pay the bill and leff. Wunnah cant be liming bout here like is Yonge Street Caribana Friday".

Ya think we got the hint? Nuh uh!

1030 is the time these people (myself included) leave the people restaurant. Ya know why? Wasn't cause we was conversating and chatting and exchanging wittisisms and blog trivia ya kno. It was solely because people was maliciousing on Eduardo and Scott. Ok that word maliciousing is a bajan word so I will have to explain for some of you guys. It mean that they/we were being nosy in other people business.

Imagine this, I sitting down and all a sudden I notice Cranky and a few others gone silent and staring intently in my direction past me with this troubled look on their face. I figure the police behind there ready to Rodney King me so I starting to get worried but no they staring at the folks at the next table. I cant even look around and stare to see who they looking at so all I can do is go by the looks on their faces as to what going on.

You would think it was a soap opera. It was two guys speaking intently having a very intimate intense type conversation from the sounds of it. Next thing how I realize that these bloggers was seriously maliciousing in the people business was when out of the blue they name the two men Eduardo and Scott and start concocting background stories about how Scott left he wife for Eduardo and Eduardo want to go back home to he two pickney and whole flashback scene they figure out while watching the couple. Imagine that!

Hanging onto every emotion emerging from the table. I hear all sort of talk about how Eduardo being firm now he angry now he coy and running the whole spectrum. Dinner the spectator sport what can I say.

Miss Straight from Scarborough was next to me and my girl pull out she compact pretending she fixing she face and staring back at Scott and Eduardo. Somebody been watching too much police shows on tv lol. Then she just move seats to get a clearer view. Well well well! Meanwhile me and Mocha cant see anything cause we aren't facing the Eduardo/Scott table and we cant just turn around our chairs and face them but every few minutes the fella with no "handle" telling me that my big head blogging their view of the couple. chupse! :-)

See how these Toronto bloggers does operate? Don't let them people know ya business boy. Ya would be in trouble!

Then to show ya how feisty these people is you wouldn't imagine what they do next. Yes people take pictures of Eduardo and Scott! These people brazen nuh! I know somebody out there saying "Noooo ya lie!". Nuh uh! Under the pretense of taking some photos of the flower arrangements certain people turn paparazzi on the couple. Seriously ya would swear it was Bradgelina or even Tie and who she name sitting across from us.

Ya aint know that if Eduardo and Scott didn't leave the restaurant we would still be there right now. People talking about no we aint leaving we want to see a resolution between the couple. We want closure. Well well well.

Next time I think Scott and Eduardo going to have to start selling tickets to dinner. I mean at the very least if they providing entertainment for all a we they might as well get a free dinner out of it.

All in all a fun time had by everyone (Eduardo and Scott excluding) though. What can I say the bloggers are good folks ....but it was a struggle to even write this blog. I'm talking some more time off. Peace!

Sunday, December 03, 2006

Dec 3

Tomorrow may never come
For you or me
Life is not promised
Tomorrow may never show up
For you and me
This life is not promised
I ain't no perfect man
I'm trying to do, the best that I can,
With what it is I have
I ain't no perfect man
I'm trying to do, the best that I can,
With what it is I have


Umi Says - Mos Def

Another year another birthday. So what exactly does it say about you when you share the same birthdate as Ozzy Osbourne?