Saturday, March 25, 2006

Respect

I'd rather be broke and have a whole lot of respect

Time's up - O.C

There is a lot wrong with the world as it stands today or maybe I'm just well on my way to becoming a dinosaur who hasn't adjusted to the subtle nuances of today's world. Whatever it is, one thing is for sure; things dun changed.... and not necessarily for the better.

The debate goes on and on as to why things have changed. Some blame the faster pace we live at, others Hollywood's influence, others today's music and still others the decline of the family structure and organized religion. Whatever it is, one thing is for certain society is not what it used to be.

Somehow along the way things which were taught by parents were no longer taught or maybe they were and the children just ignored the teachings. Manners and simple courtesies seem to have become extinct and behavior in public places has gotten to a stage where anything goes and anyone who disagrees is labeled not liberal enough or a prude.

Worst of all it seems like respect for your fellow man has vanished.

Back in the day there were just certain types of behavior that one didn't engage in when in certain venues or around certain persons. Not because said behavior was illegal or anything and I'm not saying that these behaviors were not indulged in at all just that there was a certain place and a certain time for them and there was a place and a time when they were not displayed. It was a matter of respect ...combined with the prospect of a degree of shame, I suppose, at being called out if one crossed those invisible lines and did what wasn't considered proper when and where one wasn't supposed to. Those barriers no longer exist.

These thoughts occurred to me today when I was on my way home and heard this guy swearing up a storm in what seemed to just be a regular conversation with a friend. I'm not big on the whole swearing thing myself but I figure to each his own and if that's the way you communicate well so be it. My problem with the public display was that it took place in the presence of other person's children who through no fault of their own were in close proximity. Here's your taste of the real world today little lads and lasses I guess.

No its not the first time I've witnessed such and probably wont be the last but it just struck me that even the most foul mouthed characters I knew as a youth would restrain or attempt to restrain themselves when in the presence of children and women. We all still knew that they were foul mouthed but at the same time they tried to give us a reprieve, shield us so to speak from that language and other negatives in society because of a certain respect for women and children.

Maybe I should be saying they were being hypocritical and what is done in the dark should be done in the light as well but I still think there was/is some merit in shielding young ones from certain behavior.

Anyway I didn't come here with the intent to preach and I fear I have so I'll leave it there.

17 comments:

Campfyah said...

Times done change Jdid and changed for the worse. The cussing, dressing or lack thereof and overall normal behavior is what was considered absolutely abnormal in our times.

Honest said...

Preach on... Times have changed and unfortunately in certain instences for the worse.

Radmila said...

I have on more than one occasion asked someone to tone down language in front of my stepchildren..sometimes I get a "oh, sorry" and compliance, other times I get a snort and continuance of the conversation as though I hadn't said anything.
I have been known to have a potty mouth when I get angry, and sometimes a well placed word drives home a point, but for some people it's filler for a bad or underdeveloped vocabulary.

Quel said...

Great post. On point.

Brotha Buck said...

I think many kids are just speaking like theyve been taught to speak at home. Their parents speak that way, they don't respect their own kids enough to hold their tongues, so kids don't know whats respectul and disrespectful.

De Immigrant said...

I feel you Jdid. I see it as a diminishing respect for family and therefore children and elders. People no longer see children as our future. Everyone is just out for themselves, today, now...and to hell with anybody else.

Slow Metamorphosis said...

I don't think it's hypocritical to curb your mouth in front of your elders, women and children at all! I think your post is right on point and folk just dont care anymore all types of manners so to say are gone out the window.

Luke Cage said...

Hey Jdid, Brotha Buck and Slow Metamorphosis touched on something rather poignant in their comments. It's a perpetuated and jacked up upbringing from parents who swore freely around the children, and they in turn carry that same mentality. With no home training or schooling, said children are meant to curb themselves without the apparatus' to do so. It's not just the language either. I recall almost taking a dude's head off several years back when he decided to take a whiz on a very public street and my neice was with me. I was vexed when he casually felt like the sidewalk we were walking on became his private urinal. Preach you say? I say let the word be heard my friend.

Dr. D. said...

JDid, lots of adults and youngsters have no brougtupsy or as we say in Ja....'nuh come off a good table'......it is just sickening. (And I am by no means a prude, and do use 4 letter words myeslf...certainly not in public forums however. In today's society...the more crass and lacking in manners that a person is, the more they are respected by many. I doh know.....a particular case was the recent story here about the 14 y.o. teen girl who decided that the National Stadium at a public sporting event was the proper place to blow her bf...and the suckee uses his camera phone to takes photos of the action and then he e-mails it to his bredrins??? I doh know...I mussi well old!

Just make sure that you and Mrs. Did let the young Didlet know what is right and proper when the time comes...I'm sure you will do a fine job.

Amadeo said...

People suck...there are things I'll do with conviction that I wouldn't do in front of children.

Quirky Creativity said...

I hear you!!
By the way.. did you know you were quoted in an article on Afrotoronto.com?
Superstar!! :)

Abeni said...

Unfortunately times have changed and these things are now common place.So when you question it peopel look at you as if you committed a crime

Kaschief said...

I agree with you Jdid. We've come to the point where the term "good" means bad and "bad" means good. It's not too unusual to hear two schoolchildren on the public bus talking about the previous night's sexcapade, and giving a full review to the chagrin of all the passengers. And dare not tell them to shut up, or tomorrow would be your funeral. Yup, society has changed. Alot! But, do we have to change to adapt with it? Because, if not, we'll seemingly be left behind. Is it a take it or leave it situation? Hmmm...

Rose said...

Almost everything that's happening to respect and how our kids are acting can be traced back to their homes. Sadly these kids were raised by mothers who are 15 and the grandmother is 30. The young is raising the young and no one knows how to do it. They don't understand role modeling because the great grandmother is 45. They received no remodeling. I see it every single day. Mothers are drugging, cussing kids out, leaving them alone and the kids are raising themselves. Times are different, in the past that 15 year old was young in age but an adult in the mind. They married and it lasted. But today, these kids are running wild.

princessdominique said...

I agree with love for your fellow man vanishing. People just aren't holding each other to those standards anymore. It may sound selfish but you can't imagine how many people who I consider friends won't pass on the Big Mac combo and support me by buying my book, even though they know I do this full time. They'd rather gain the extra 5 pounds over time than show genuine love and support. Imagine that?

LivingSingle said...

Let the church say AAAAAMMEEEEENNNN. There's a lack of respect in this society today. And it's only getting worse.

jelli_us said...

I agree with Campfyah... folks today don't have much respect for themselves or others.