I should really get ready for work but whatever! Yesterday as I walk through the torrential rainfall to the bus stop to go to work two thoughts popped into my head.
First thing was boy I really cant believe that you walking through all this lightning and thunder to go to work. Ya like ya really get Canadianized cause ya done know if ya was in Barbados ya would be calling in late or work would have shut down cause the river bus stand get flood out or River Road impassable or somebody had to row two lil children from school up in St James. Meanwhile everybody looking to run up Big B's to get a flashlight, double D batteries and three cans of corned beef.
I mean yesterday seriously lightning licking off all around me like holiday fireworks and thunder bussing shots like Hollywood summer action flicks. And is not like ya can duck the rain, once ya step out raincoat, umbrella and all that don't make no difference ya getting hit! Is madness for me to going to work in that sort of weather ya kno! Is like man walking through gun fight to go to work. Why?
Plus what is the point of me getting soaked to have to go to work, then I ketch the cold and I out for two weeks? Oh wait I forget when ya sick here you don't stay home, ya duz go work and get everybody else sick. Chupse! Why be the only miserable person share and share alike. Next thing everybody sneezing and weezing and sniffling and some even reach the stage of some big big thunder like rattling chest coughs that duz shake the windows three offices down. You minding ya business and all a sudden you feeling the floor shake and walls buckle and you scream earthquake and jump under your desk only for somebody to pass by your cubicle and say no man dat aint no earthquake is just George down in payroll coughing. He had that cold for two weeks now and it like it getting worse. Worse? Worse? The man near turn big bad wolf huff and puff and cough and cough and blow down the building and all you can say is cold get worse? Chupse!
Meanwhile George aint stan home one day yet but he passing on the cold like relay baton (STICK!) or a game of tag. HA ha you're it but ya still aint stanning home you coming work to pass the cold on to the next unsuspecting victim.
Anyway that was what I think about as I walked to the bus stop. Well that and wondering if one of these lightning bolts strike me if I would develop any superpowers? I did always want to be able to walk through walls like Vision ya know.
Looka I done with this talk I going and call in sick.
p.s Toronto people if ya din know Colin Channer reading from Iron Ballons at Indigo at Bay and Bloor tomorrow Thursday evening at 7pm. Channer has a story called "How to beat a child the good and proper way" Is a good read trust me! Go check it out.