Aliens and Monsters

Ok so one of my homies was kind enough to hook me up with a pass to check out an advanced screening of The Cave featuring everyone's favorite heartthrob Boy in the Hood Morris 'Girls think he's so finnneee' Chestnut on Wednesday night.

(As an aside did anyone see BET's top 25 hottest men of the last 25 years last night. Chestnut came in at 25 and the rapper Nelly a dude who walks around with band aids on his face came in at 19. I'll let the ladies discuss that but I'm just upset that I wasn't on the list cause if Nelly was at 19 I think I should have at least come in at number 12.)

Anyway the Cave is an ok movie, one of those 'it may do well cause its stars pretty people' types. Why is it in Hollywood when you're in one of those going to war or going to get down to serious business situations you are usually surrounded by model types and in real life well real life you never see those types of people lol.

Oh well like I was saying the movie is nothing really groundbreaking or special but then Hollywood hasn't really brought it this summer. Actually that's an understatement. Hollywood has been rather pathetic this summer when you think of it.

Anyway I also caught a view of War of the Worlds last weekend, wanted to check it out cause Mr Cage gave it a good review and I had heard bad things about it. What can I say I actually liked it but Dakota Fanning needed to have black parents who would drop two lashes in her always screaming ass. 'Wha you crying fa, dem aliens truble you? I will give ya sumting ta cry bout'. Still between the Cave and War of the Worlds I've come to this conclusion.

Hollywood has run out of original ideas for Aliens and Monsters and is recycling monsters.

Yea we already know they recycle plot ideas and remake TV shows and old films but dammit if they aint going too far now. They're recycling monsters.

Trust me on this one. The aliens in War of the Worlds are pretty much the same as the aliens in Independence day and the Monsters in The Cave, while not exactly the same as any other movie monsters that I've seen borrow heavily from films like Aliens (actually they probably borrowed part of that plot too) and other monster films.

Its like they create monsters from a recipe now.

Alrightee boys and girls today on the Monster Network we'll teach you how to make your own monster. Yeaaahhhh! First he's got to have big eyes and scales. Check! He's got to be a greeny, browny, greyish, darkish type skin tone. Ok Check! Ok next give him some long claws. Check. And don't forget the really really sharp teeth. Gotcha! Next make him slimy and drooling more than your average dude oogling hot chicks in tight pum pum shorts during the summer. Dammmm! Ok check. Add tail or horns as needed, stir and viola Instant Monster.

Caucasian please! (I stole that from Kami, its sweet!) Cant we have something other than the proto-typical monster? Try a ting nuh! Give me a bright yellow feathered monster like a deranged, feral Big Bird or something. Give me an ashy monster, give me a monster with tiny eyes and no teeth. You know just think outside the box. Is that too much to ask.

Oh yea and a non-predictable script would help too.