Friday, August 26, 2005

Aliens and Monsters

Image hosted by Photobucket.com Ok so one of my homies was kind enough to hook me up with a pass to check out an advanced screening of The Cave featuring everyone's favorite heartthrob Boy in the Hood Morris 'Girls think he's so finnneee' Chestnut on Wednesday night.

(As an aside did anyone see BET's top 25 hottest men of the last 25 years last night. Chestnut came in at 25 and the rapper Nelly a dude who walks around with band aids on his face came in at 19. I'll let the ladies discuss that but I'm just upset that I wasn't on the list cause if Nelly was at 19 I think I should have at least come in at number 12.)

Anyway the Cave is an ok movie, one of those 'it may do well cause its stars pretty people' types. Why is it in Hollywood when you're in one of those going to war or going to get down to serious business situations you are usually surrounded by model types and in real life well real life you never see those types of people lol.

Oh well like I was saying the movie is nothing really groundbreaking or special but then Hollywood hasn't really brought it this summer. Actually that's an understatement. Hollywood has been rather pathetic this summer when you think of it.

Anyway I also caught a view of War of the Worlds last weekend, wanted to check it out cause Mr Cage gave it a good review and I had heard bad things about it. What can I say I actually liked it but Dakota Fanning needed to have black parents who would drop two lashes in her always screaming ass. 'Wha you crying fa, dem aliens truble you? I will give ya sumting ta cry bout'. Still between the Cave and War of the Worlds I've come to this conclusion.

Hollywood has run out of original ideas for Aliens and Monsters and is recycling monsters.

Yea we already know they recycle plot ideas and remake TV shows and old films but dammit if they aint going too far now. They're recycling monsters.

Trust me on this one. The aliens in War of the Worlds are pretty much the same as the aliens in Independence day and the Monsters in The Cave, while not exactly the same as any other movie monsters that I've seen borrow heavily from films like Aliens (actually they probably borrowed part of that plot too) and other monster films.

Its like they create monsters from a recipe now.

Alrightee boys and girls today on the Monster Network we'll teach you how to make your own monster. Yeaaahhhh! First he's got to have big eyes and scales. Check! He's got to be a greeny, browny, greyish, darkish type skin tone. Ok Check! Ok next give him some long claws. Check. And don't forget the really really sharp teeth. Gotcha! Next make him slimy and drooling more than your average dude oogling hot chicks in tight pum pum shorts during the summer. Dammmm! Ok check. Add tail or horns as needed, stir and viola Instant Monster.

Caucasian please! (I stole that from Kami, its sweet!) Cant we have something other than the proto-typical monster? Try a ting nuh! Give me a bright yellow feathered monster like a deranged, feral Big Bird or something. Give me an ashy monster, give me a monster with tiny eyes and no teeth. You know just think outside the box. Is that too much to ask.

Oh yea and a non-predictable script would help too.

18 comments:

Dr. D. said...

You have said nuff...so I will jus add..have a irie weekend JDid!

dorna! said...

*chuckles* I've been bitching about those tired movies for the past 5 years solid. :)

Nikki said...

Jdid, you're right. This is probably the first summer that I can recall which has not had a box offices smash. Yeah, some of the movies have raked in a pretty penny this summer, but nothing that just stands out or has taken the country by storm. Not one single flick. Maybe the mad rush to get movies out for Christmas will fare better.

Amadeo said...

I think Aliens was the last of the good...everyone looks at me funny when I say I'd hatee to have to deal with Gremlins...They multiply son!

Amadeo said...

The nerd in me agrees but I loved Revenge of the Sith and Batman Begins...other than that.

brooklyn babe said...

Most original monster/alien was Predator... but I got one question, why did he have to have dreadlocks...huh wassup with that.

Abeni said...

Nelly above Morris Chestnut?That is soooo wrong!I not a fan of them alien things anyway..bring on the animateds:)

JayBee said...

dont' sleep on nelly. bandaids are hott. chestnut gets a "meh" in my book. i bet shemar moore was on the list, too eh? ick. hollywood needs some new ink. the same ol' same ol' black faces. jdid hurry up and get famous and we'll ooh and ahh over you for a minute.

button_nose said...

I know what you mean with the movies this summer....they are really weak!

I am going to see Four Brothers this weekend, and I hope it's good cause the last movie I enjoyed was "The Longest Yard", I thought that movie was funny as shite!! I laughed practically from beginning to end! After that everything else is just a blur, and a waste of my money!!

Smooches :)

Hey what's up with the word verification thing?!?!?

Inside Man said...

Only good flick I have caught this summer is Hustle & Flow. All these remakes have been a huge disapointment, and the originality in the new flicks are flat.

Mad Bull said...

Hey, the Longest Yard was a remake too! The original starred Burt Reynolds.
How do you mean, "Whos Burt Reynolds?". Does your mom know you're online? Google him for yourself! >:-[

Brotha Buck said...

Wow, I am way behind and never heard of this movie, and think I may want to hide it from the wife.

Jdid said...

@Dr D - same to you
@Dorna - yep they are pretty pathetic
@Nikki - yea this summer has been lukewarm
@Amadeo - no one remembers gremlins. ok batman and star wars were decent but thats too good movies in the last 4 months
@Brooklyn Babe - well it was either that or an afro and how silly would an afro have been
@abeni - i thought you loved nelly and his get your eagle on :-)
@jaybee - working on it, working on it, and suprise suprise no shemar on the list, no taye diggs either
@bajan beauty - put in the word verification to get rid of the spam
@kg - you said it bro
@Mad Bull - ha ha ha
@Brother Buck - yep it didnt get much publicity until the last few days i think

smallislandgirl said...

yeah jdid have an irie weekend oh btw I looove morris chestnut.

Abeni said...

Yup..I like get your eagle on.but those gold caps and bandaids vs Morris Chestnut...No way!

Shotta M said...

I liked the Fantastic Four this summer

That was recycled stuff too but perhaps it felt fresh because they haven't been recyling as much in that genre as the others.

obifromsouthlondon said...

heh I love the idea of two lashes. make em scream fe sum real reason.

yeah ideas ran out love-you-long time ago. now all we've got are recycled assassins and villians.

solitaire said...

The reviewer for the Toronto Star made me laugh... 'im seh dis Cave movie has a bunch of model-looking white guys (re: can't act) and Morris Chestnut, the token Black guy thrown in for visual effect. LOL. BTW, it wasn't a racist quip, he was making fun of Hollyweird for trying to be so PC. Brothas don't show up in caves.

Did he die, though? I bet he was the first one.

Troot you should have been on that list... Nelly...UGH.