Katrina

Not much one can say here. The Gulf Coast, New Orleans and Mississippi have been devastated by Hurricane Katrina. Last year we had Ivan hitting the Caribbean and beating up on Grenada, Caymans, Jamaica and Haiti and this year its Katrina's turn to cause devastation and death in the Western Hemisphere. Deaths, many left homeless, rising waters still posing problems in New Orleans, 80% of Mississippi without power, a genuine catastrophe.



Thing is I'm guessing these sights will become more and more familiar to us as the Atlantic Hurricanes get stronger and stronger. Looking like storms on steroids these super hurricanes are poised to strike with much fury in coming years it seems. Global warming some say while others refute that claim. Whatever it is, you cant deny that the storms are starting earlier and are bigger, stronger and more menacing than ever before.

And its not like you can fight a storm. How you going to fight a storm? Only thing you can do is run, retreat from its rage. Mother Nature will whoop your ass if you think you can fight her.



My prayers go out to those hit by this disaster. Rough times ahead at least for the next few days, as people struggle to get the basic necessities for life, and maybe even longer for those who have lost loved ones and their homes. Stay strong people!.

While Jackson, Mississippi doesn't seem to have felt the brunt of Katrina's force like some other gulf coast areas I'm still sending a prayer out to fellow blogger Nikki over at Ink Blotter and hoping that she and her fam are safe over there.

Word.....Life

Sticks and Stones may break my bones
But words can never harm me

Does everyone remember those words from that nursery rhyme that we were taught as kids? Its basically a little ditty to make kids not worry about verbal harassment and the like from their peers. No need to get all aggravated over what little Johnny said about your moms cause its just words and words they can't do young Jack or Mary any physical harm so ignore them.

Have all of you discovered the great fallacy of those words yet?

Words can in fact leave far deeper wounds than sticks and stones. Even deeper wounds than bullets and machetes. Wounds that take way longer to heal than those left by physical implements. Not physical wounds for the most part, although dudes have been known to keel over with a heart attack or a stroke from receiving distressing news, but mostly emotional wounds. Serious emotional scarring and intense emotional issues caused just from the use of simple words. Discarded words, words which we might not even remember uttering but which hit someone else like daggers, leaving wounds which might heal but will never be forgotten

What that means in case you haven't figured it out is that words are powerful and dangerous. Very powerful, very dangerous. Forget licensing guns what we need is a word registry to stop unlawful use of words to harm the innocent and not so innocent. If you don't know how to use the words properly you shouldn't be allowed to use them. Especially since some folks cant control the spray of their words (your nine spray, my mind spray) and though they may aim at one person they end up having a machine gun or grenade effect and blasting everyone in the immediate vicinity and even causing further damage down the road as those words get passed on. No precision strike just word Collateral Damage I guess. Everyone gets blown to smithereens.

And have you ever thought about how a few words can so change your entire disposition and outlook? Say one of you young ladies wakes up in a bad mood, gets ready for work, still feeling vex and moody and suddenly on your way down the street some nice looking guy (cause if is an ugly fella ya will ignore him) looks at you and out of the blue says something like 'miss you are looking mighty fine today' or a simple 'I like your style.' Just walks by and says something to that effect. No stop and try to lay down any more lyrics/sweet talk to try to pick you up, just a few words and then he's gone. Those few little words will pick you up and cause you to smile and before long you are head high, feeling nice walking down the street. Those words might even keep you happy for the whole day.

Alternatively you can wake up in the best of moods and someone throws an offhand remark your way like a ginsu knife. It strikes with better precision than a laser guided missile and in an instant your sunny disposition has been blown to bits, sun turned to a gloomy overcast outlook which clouds your entire day. You go from a feeling of being above the clouds to being 6 feet deep with the gravediggers throwing dirt in your face all within an instant. All because of what?......A few simple words.

Simple uncomplex arrangements of letters in a grouping which sound a certain way or looks a certain way on paper and have a specific meaning. Words, formed from the most basic of building blocks; letters so harmless, so uncomplicated (well except for that whole capital Q thing cause let me tell ya that's one disturbing letter. Looks like a genetically mutated O or something. What am I the only one who thinks that? Oh ok, umm forget I mentioned that. la la la nothing to see here) to look at yet so filled with the possibility of causing damage when arranged into those combinations called words. Those words that can be so caustic or acidic or emotionally scarring all formed by these simple, innocent A, B, C's (and disturbing Q's). Aint that funny?

Mind you I'm not innocent here myself. Sometimes like Mobb Deep said I got to adopt a mentality where its like 'I'm goin out blastin, takin my enemies with me, and if not, they scarred, so they will never forget me '. And sometimes in that crossfire the 'innocent' and not so innocent well as O.C said 'when the missile is aimed to blow you out of the frame, some will lose their limbs and some will be maimed' but hey that's life and we all most do it at least sometime in life. Sometimes things come to a head and words are the safest option to solve your problems or at least fight your battles.

A so it go!

Do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth? Respect the words. Think about the words. We use them everyday to communicate. They are such a major part of our lives so important to our lives, so integral to our interactions. We use them with such frequency that we don't really consider their worth, their sharpness, their power to affect others, their power to affect life.

Word ....Life!

Seven Things

ok mademoisselle Groove tagged me so I'm going to respond.

Seven Things

I…Plan to Do Before I Die:
1. ummm according to my wife first off I dont plan and secondly I have no hope for the future (should I be worried that she actually said that to me? See I told y'all she's trying to kill me and y'all didnt believe me) so I cant answer this one. My time here on earth may be short.

Things I Can Do:
1. Cook
2. Write
3. Be extremely moody (its the artist in me)
4. Swim
5. Support my friends
6. Play Pan (badly)
7. recite random rap songs verbatim for no apparent reason

Things I Can’t Do:
1. Skate
2. Golf
3. listen to classical music
4. sleep for 8 hrs straight
5. go to operas and that sort of theatre business (yes I purposely am happy in my ignorance plus i dont see them punks coming to my cultural ish so what da tail I supporting dem for)
6. be disloyal (well i could be but its really really really hard and I stress over it too much)
7. like weather under 20C

Things I say most:
1. What?
2. Damn!
3. I cant believe it
4. Really?
5. Mos Def!
6. Whoa!
7. Chupse!

Things that attract me to the opposite sex
1. Being down to Earth
2. Intelligent
3. Not obsessed with money (I aint saying she's a golddigger lol)
4. Nice body (in my opinion so that may not be nice body in other opinions)
5. Style
6. Kindness, caring
7. Humility

Celebrity crushes
1. Tweet
2. Sanaa Latham
3. Mary J Blige (dont ask)
4. Rosario Dawson
5. Malinda Williams (despite her doing that Young Buck video)
6. Toyna Lee Williams
7. Eva Mendes

what I only get 7 I was just getting started, lol.

And I'm not tagging anyone but if you fel the urge go right ahead.

Aliens and Monsters

Ok so one of my homies was kind enough to hook me up with a pass to check out an advanced screening of The Cave featuring everyone's favorite heartthrob Boy in the Hood Morris 'Girls think he's so finnneee' Chestnut on Wednesday night.

(As an aside did anyone see BET's top 25 hottest men of the last 25 years last night. Chestnut came in at 25 and the rapper Nelly a dude who walks around with band aids on his face came in at 19. I'll let the ladies discuss that but I'm just upset that I wasn't on the list cause if Nelly was at 19 I think I should have at least come in at number 12.)

Anyway the Cave is an ok movie, one of those 'it may do well cause its stars pretty people' types. Why is it in Hollywood when you're in one of those going to war or going to get down to serious business situations you are usually surrounded by model types and in real life well real life you never see those types of people lol.

Oh well like I was saying the movie is nothing really groundbreaking or special but then Hollywood hasn't really brought it this summer. Actually that's an understatement. Hollywood has been rather pathetic this summer when you think of it.

Anyway I also caught a view of War of the Worlds last weekend, wanted to check it out cause Mr Cage gave it a good review and I had heard bad things about it. What can I say I actually liked it but Dakota Fanning needed to have black parents who would drop two lashes in her always screaming ass. 'Wha you crying fa, dem aliens truble you? I will give ya sumting ta cry bout'. Still between the Cave and War of the Worlds I've come to this conclusion.

Hollywood has run out of original ideas for Aliens and Monsters and is recycling monsters.

Yea we already know they recycle plot ideas and remake TV shows and old films but dammit if they aint going too far now. They're recycling monsters.

Trust me on this one. The aliens in War of the Worlds are pretty much the same as the aliens in Independence day and the Monsters in The Cave, while not exactly the same as any other movie monsters that I've seen borrow heavily from films like Aliens (actually they probably borrowed part of that plot too) and other monster films.

Its like they create monsters from a recipe now.

Alrightee boys and girls today on the Monster Network we'll teach you how to make your own monster. Yeaaahhhh! First he's got to have big eyes and scales. Check! He's got to be a greeny, browny, greyish, darkish type skin tone. Ok Check! Ok next give him some long claws. Check. And don't forget the really really sharp teeth. Gotcha! Next make him slimy and drooling more than your average dude oogling hot chicks in tight pum pum shorts during the summer. Dammmm! Ok check. Add tail or horns as needed, stir and viola Instant Monster.

Caucasian please! (I stole that from Kami, its sweet!) Cant we have something other than the proto-typical monster? Try a ting nuh! Give me a bright yellow feathered monster like a deranged, feral Big Bird or something. Give me an ashy monster, give me a monster with tiny eyes and no teeth. You know just think outside the box. Is that too much to ask.

Oh yea and a non-predictable script would help too.

Big Fat and Thick

I like dem big and fat and thick
120 de too bony
130 dey too hungry
160 dem girls too small fa me
ya have ta weigh a tonne a get my attention

And on and on it goes. Those are the words from a Crop Over song from a calypsonian Captain Sawyer this year.

So I come across this article today.

This lady in New Hampshire fired off a complaint to the medical board of New Hampshire because her doctor told her she was obese. Imagine that?

The complaint doesn't seem to be about the manner in which the doctor told his patient about her weight issues but the fact that he told her about them and suggested she lose weight. I guess she wasn't ready for him to burst her bubble of delusion.

Come on now. Your doctor is supposed to be the one person to tell you things straight up. You don't want your doctor to be like that knight in Monty Python's Holy Grail who lost a leg fighting and swears it was just a little nick, a mere flesh wound. No if you are at the doctor you want him to give you the results straight. Yes you want him to be sensitive and have a nice bedside manner, which is probably why I'm not in the medical field, but you want the truth.

By his deeds

Sitting in your church on Sunday
Thinking who you gonna screw Monday
Who you gonna tief
Who you gonna rob
Take it as me tell you seh you cann fool God no

.......................
By his deeds shall a man be known
Man a ask you for a piece of bread
You give him stone

By his Deeds - Warrior King

So did everyone see Reverend Pat Robertson's call on the U.S to go and assassinate Venezuela's president Hugo Chavez. Imagine that a big so-called man of the cloth letting off talk about how the U.S should get rid of another country's ruler in the middle of a religious broadcast to boot. I mean I'm not naive enough to think that the U.S doesn't do those types of things already but just openly calling for it is a bit much.

I hope that don't happen though cause my girl Campfyah would got to try and run outta that place real hard. Start building a raft girl, Trinidad is that way over to the left and doan worry dem might mistake ya fa a bajan fisherman teifing the flying fishes an lock ya up but if ya sneak out a lil note wrap up in a doubles or a roti skin I would get a message to Owen to tell Patrick let ya go. :-)

Anyway I'm not surprised by the audacity of Robertson's comments. Some fellas hide behind this whole Christian front in order justify or to try and get away with certain underhanded evil statements and just end up bringing the entire Christian movement into disrepute. Remember back last October I blogged about how Jerry Falwell said to "blow them all away in the name of the lord" so this is nothing new. Robertson is just spewing his brand of hatred while utilizing the name of God.

Some people will say but these are supposed to be God fearing Christian people but remember how many wars have been fought in the history of our world because of religion and how many atrocities were carried out supposedly in God's name. Remember it's some of those same God fearing American people that had black people downpress under Jim Crow laws yet going to church every Sunday so don't be too surprised by this behavior.

And when you think of it what's the difference between these Christian fundamentalists and Muslim fundamentalists? Oh my bad the Christian fundamentalists no longer want to be known as fundamentalists.

In an article on Billy Graham and his son Franklin, August 22nd's issue of the New Yorker magazine said that apparently the Christian religious right is not happy with the word 'fundamentalist' anymore as it conjures up negative images. Bob Jones III (you know of Bob Jones University where up until a few years ago inter-racial dating was not allowed since apparently it is forbidden in the bible somewhere) said 'Instead of 'fundamentalism' defining us as steadfast Bible believers this term now carries negative overtones of radicalism and terrorism..... Many of us who are separated unto Christ feel it is appropriate to find a new label that will define us more positively and appropriately". So apparently this new label is 'Preservationists' however it hasn't actually caught on yet.

Another article I read, this months Harpers Magazine, says rightly that a lot of folks really don't understand this Christian thing. As an example it was mentioned that especially screwed up was this whole belief that the Bible actually says God helps those who help themselves. Well I don't know if you believe that but that was actually a Benjamin Franklin quote not no bible. Anyway this article was saying that belief is used by many religious folks to justify why they don't want to help the less needy when in fact the bible says you should look after those less fortunate. Aint that something?

Still back to this fundamentalism thing. What's the difference? The Muslim fundamentalist spread their influence by building madrasas (schools) to preach their doctrine, the Christian fundamentalists just use TV shows and their lobbying power in government. All see everything as a war between the religions and as a need to eradicate the other. Yea the Muslim fundamentalists may have gone a little further by reaching the bombing stage now but basically they all teach the same no tolerance message. I mean I cant lie I know in some of my views I've got a few fundamentalist views but I still believe that the bible says you should be setting examples to your fellow man if you want him to change his ways and the like not bombing him or attacking him. That just don't seem right. By his deeds a man shall be known!

p.s: I love the way how the U.S media is using this whole Pat Robertson issue to get in a message to the unsuspecting public who are going "who the hell is this Chavez dude" that Chavez is a dictator, a strong man, a bad bad man and a friend of Fidel Castro who hates the U.S and has put Bush on trial and will try to hold onto Venezuela's oil. Oil hmmm, do I smell a coup in the near future?

Just one of those days

Its kinda like that movie Falling Down with michael douglas
I feel the struggle is ill
I wanta smuggle this .....

(would tell y'all the song and artist but no one got close to it over at hiphopquotables)

Its just one of those days as Monica or Sizzla would say I guess. Speaking of Sizzla anyone hear that new tune Come Fly with me by Foxy Brown featuring Sizzla? Nice tune I must say but whoa whats with Sizzla's brazen brazen rawness and expletives on the track. I mean I know 'Mr Black Woman and Chile yea yea yeah!' and 'Mr Thank you mama' aint no choirboy but still singing lyrics like 'come fly with me, I'm here to *bleep* you girl'. Just a bit too much I think. And to think that dese sorta 'righteous' reggae bwoy want to diss my soca. cho! Oh well, all dem is entertainer I cant take them seriously.

Anyway nothing to say today, in a igrant type of mood so I'm just keeping my thoughts to myself. Just blogging to let you know I'm still here. Later.

File under misc.

Just a quick weekend shout.

First up I get soaked on my way home yesterday as Toronto was hit with some serious thunderstorms and flash floods and the like. A Tornado warning was even in effect. Seems like some of the small towns in the area got the brunt of it but we still managed quite a bit of water so much so that the Don Valley Parkway, one of the major highways to get in and out of downtown, was flooded and had to be closed.

By the time I reached home yesterday I was thoroughly soaked. And since me and rain don't really get along too well I really didn't feel 100% last night but I survived.

Second wanted to shout out another Caribbean blogger in the T-dot area that I just discovered, the one miss Becky Banton, me no kno if she a Buju likkle sista' but go check her site out. She had a couple of interesting posts this week about how Kayne West came to Toronto and make a complete ass of himself. These celebrities! You would think a guy who almost got to met the maker after a serious car accident a couple of years ago would learn some humility wouldn't ya? Big chupse!

Speaking of Caribbean Bloggers, I am now a proud member of the Cariblogrs crew. Is just a web ring highlighting bloggers with a Caribbean link and as can be seen by my being a member you don't actually have to be physically in the islands to be a member so I would like to invite all wunnah wid a Caribbean connection to join up. Right now it peeny peeny den, but I know we have quite a few of you guys out there with Caribbean connects so yo juss link up nuh man!

What else I have to say? Well regarding my last post the more I think of it the more I say Councillor Thompson has made a complete johnny (that is a bajan word meaning fool) of himself. I'm seeing interviews with him in the local West Indian newspapers where he is claiming he is glad he said what he said then I see in the article I linked I quote "Mr. Thompson said he had been advised by a lawyer that randomly targeting and questioning black youth was illegal and so he would not support it. " Ok so how dumb do you have to be to need a lawyer to tell you that you said something wrong? I bet he's going to backpedal now and say he was just trying to get folks to discuss the issue by saying something controversial and he wasn't to be taken seriously. Yo dude should just tender his resignation immediately. He's not fit for office.

Getting to that whole gun murders thing in Toronto I must reiterate that I feel that somehow the community has let down our black youth and more has to be done. Those who have made it cant forget those who haven't made it and our elders cant/shouldn't just pass sweeping judgments on the predicament of the youth without realizing that they must take some of the blame for not stepping up and being leaders in the community. While you were pursuing your dreams you forgot all about the helping of those less fortunate than you.

And speaking on my own behalf even though I'm not an elder yet I think I've got to go and do more myself.

On that note I must say I am pretty impressed by the efforts of NBA player Jamaal Magloire in staying in contact with his community here in Toronto, offering scholarships and just giving back in general. And I don't think I've ever seen homeboy walking around all blinged up either which isn't really the image I get of most NBA players. He just looks like one of the boys hanging out whenever I've seen him only standing out because he's like 6'10" or something of the sort. Just seems to be a cool dude who actually takes some of his millions and helps others. So respect due for that.

Anyway that's about all for now. Have a good weekend.

Random Checks

Hey watch those places you walk
and mind the way you talk
Watch out for the vampire who will sneak up in the dark
Watch out for the big time thief who claim say that dem smart
and bring in the crack and the gun to mash up the yout dem heart

Earth a run red
I hear a next yout dead!

Earth a run red - Richie Spice

We've had quite a string of murders in Toronto in recent weeks, mainly young black men getting gunned down on the streets. Its allegedly some sort of gang issue, assuming as the Police and Press have done that most of these murders are actually associated somehow, and they seem to be occurring mainly in some of the poorer (read predominantly black) neighborhoods in the city.

It has all sparked quite a cry of concern and also outrage from the general public, politicians, the press and everyone in the city. We pride ourselves here in Canada on being a gentler version of our North American neighbor, the U.S, and indeed if one compares the average U.S city's crime rates with ours then you can see that we do come in at quite a lower rate than they do. Only 41 murders so far in Toronto this year, 33 gunshot related. When you think that officially we have about 2.5 million people living here that's a drop in the ocean but murders cant be just viewed as isolated events as one cannot shouldn't ignore the actual anguish visited on friends and loved ones of the victim.

But I guess the infrequency of murders here compared to other big cities is one of the reasons why any spate of shootings stands out in our society. Unlike other places we are not yet desensitized to that sort of violence so any shooting still is a big deal to us.

So the questions remain, what do we do about this recent spate of shootings and where are these young men getting such easy access to guns? Clearly no one in the areas affected actually manufactures the weapon of choice. I mean aint no weapons factories in Rexdale or Regent or Flemmo, so they must be coming in from somewhere outside these areas and someone probably in a gated mansion somewhere well removed from the affected areas or at least in a mildly affluent neighborhood is probably profiting quite well from the sale of these weapons.

The violence perpetrated with these weapons is a serious situation and not one to be dealt with lightly in my opinion but when a black councilman in Toronto can openly call for Police to conduct random checks on young black men in certain communities as a step to somehow stopping these shootings I've got to sit back and just think about this whole situation really closely.

Truthfully I was very upset when I read about this in yesterday's newspaper. Did Councillor Michael Thompson flip his lid? Naa he couldn't really be serious about this could he? I felt betrayed somehow. I just could not believe that a black man would advocate giving policemen carte blanche on such an issue. Weren't we just complaining about racial profiling a few months back? Was he not at one time a young black man himself?

Now I wont go as far as Royston James did in his column yesterday (you can check that out at the Toronto Star but you have to subscribe to view it) in suggesting that others have dubbed Councillor Thompson an Uncle Thompson but I most strenuously disagree with the councillor's suggestion.

I'm sure there are some who wholeheartedly agree with his stance though and will say well at least he is postulating ideas while I'm just criticizing. Its a time for tough love, the kid's gloves must come on, by any means necessary we must stop this violence even if it means condoning racial profiling they will say. Well while I don't want to be accused of being soft on criminals I still disagree with the councillors suggestion.

I believe that his comments were out of place and that subscribing to his line of thought would only make situations worse. But then after all I am biased by being a young black man (even if I'm starting to grey a bit) and a law abiding citizen and I would hate to be living in a state where policemen can just routinely stop me to search me simply because of the color of my skin and the neighborhood I'm in AND its actually a policy which has been agreed upon by my government. Notice I added that last distinction because black men still face much racism and accusations from policemen in North America but at least the state does not 'publicly' condone these acts anymore.

Councillor Thompson suggestion implies that a majority of young black men out in these target neighborhoods are gun carriers or criminals. Has it been proven that the young men who live in these neighborhoods are indeed the perpetrators of these crimes as it could just as easily be outsiders committing them. This implication is also a judgment on all young black men and has far reaching implications. Here is one of our own, saying he has given up on us and its time to treat us as less than full citizens of this country by trampling on our rights. Now I could see this being spewed by our former right wing Reform or Canadian Alliance political parties but a black man actually thrusting forth this suggestion into the public realm is mind boggling to me.

I mean there is already a certain stigma that goes with dwelling in certain areas but now you are literally painting all of those residents with one broad brush saying that they are all bad people. And what percentage of these folk have guns we ask that this solution is seen as feasible? How many law abiding innocent citizens will be stopped and stripped of their dignity, as they go about their daily routine in these neighborhoods, in this policy for the return of possibly one gun. How many will be victims because they just happen to live in an targeted area? Simple victims of location. What ratio is good enough, if we stop and harass 15 to get one gun is that considered a success, what about 20, 30, 50 for one. If 50 young black men are stopped, searched and harassed and possibly scarred for life and we find one gun does that justify this policy, how about 100? What's to stop a black man from giving his gun to a female or a white man, or will the policy then extend to searching everyone in that particular neighborhood? Here's a thought lets just barrier off the entire area, give them special id cards and search them everytime they leave that area too.

How will random searches affect the already less than tepid relationships between community and law enforcement when the majority of black men stopped prove to be innocent? You really think you're going to get the community to help out if you are randomly searching and harassing the innocent? Have we not seen images of what happens in Israel and Palestine where harassment by armed forces has caused the Palestinian community to coalesce into a unified force against the Israelis. Ok that comparison rather simplifies the Middle Eastern situation but again if police are allowed powers to randomly search black men just based on location we would be creating a situation where the animosity between groups is raised to such a level that all relations are permanently soured. All that would exist is anger. How does this help law enforcement?

Plus wouldn't we be enforcing a stereotype on these young men? Why should the law abiding continue to be law abiding in these areas if they will be harassed? You're telling these young men that they are all criminals and need to be checked simply because they happen to be black. Shout it out too often and too loudly and you know what they will all start to believe it and then what?

I'm not denying that its a bad situation all around since something must be done to combat the violence but random searches, really?

Before such a reactionary move have we even looked at the causes of this violence? Why do we have a lost generation of black youth in these areas. Oh I don't know is it perhaps because the schooling in these areas is sub-par, is it regional and municipal governments have slashed and cut a lot of the community services and after school programs in these areas that would have helped to keep these kids out of trouble, is it that the young men from these areas who want a job or training are frustrated in their efforts to find either? Is it that our black leaders are ineffective and others rather than make an effort make asinine comments like Councillor Thompson. What I'm saying, even though I may be labeled an apologist, is that even though there are guilty amongst these young men who have chosen their criminal path, society has also failed them. Both society in the more local sense of their parents and friends and society in the larger sense as in their leaders and government. Have we thought about that?

Ok maybe the horse has bolted the barn on this generation and we've thrown in the towel but are we doing anything to fix it for the next one or will we wait till their cycle of violence starts to begin postulating on even more draconian measures to keep them in check?

Oh well at least the police don't agree with Councillor Thompson hey even Councillor Thompson doesn't agree with his statements anymore.

The Warning

the criminals, tryin to drop my decimals
Damn! N**** wanna stick my for my cream
And it ain't a dream, things ain't always what it seem

The Warning - B.I.G

You single folks don't realize how good you've got it. I not telling lies ya kno!

From the time you get married, people seem to assume that you've lost all common sense like the wedding ring zaps your intelligence and so they try to take advantage of you by trying to sell you all sort of crap that you don't need. Or maybe it is they say well if he/she was stupid enuff to get married maybe his/her head aint all there so we can sell them some foolishness.

I'm not kidding, as soon as you say the 'I do' its like open season on married couples. Its like they have guys whose job it is to stand around outside the church with cell phones waiting till they see you kiss the bride to call and say ok the deed done lets get him now.

'Yes bossman, Jdid get married'
'ya sure? Ya see the ring exchange? ya confirm he sign the papers?
'Yes boss, everything official. He say I do, he put on the ring, and he went up and sign the papers. And he aint look too happy happy now so ya can tell that it official! She start dragging he by the hand already!'
'Alright, thanks, send in the elite telemarketer assualt team on the double, we got him now.'

And is not like I mean only selling you little trinkets and the like, I talking about big money things that they trying to sell you. Vacations, cars, this that and the third package for thousands of dollars like just cause you now have a double income your pockets suddenly that fat.

Well them musse aint know my wife cause I aint got no double income. I now have more like half an income cause she say half of mine is hers and and what's hers well she aint telling me what she got so I aint getting nuttin. So with that sort of situation all of them barking up the wrong tree cause my pockets on E(empty). Actually scratch that I well past E.

And don't let ya ever get married and own a house. Oh gosh it gets even worse then. They will try to sell you some of everything under the sun. I an only imagine if I get kids that they might even get worse too.

Now the worst of the criminals trying to sell you stuff are the ones peddling timeshares and vacations. In truth I just got off the phone with a guy who all of a sudden, out of the blue, call me up and was trying to give me three days at a 4 star hotel in a resort area for a small amount of money. I was a little bit skeptical from the get go though as in maybe his second or third comment he said something like 'We are looking for people like you who own houses'. People like me? How he know I own a house and what my owning a house got to do with you offering me a cheap vacation? People that renting condos and apartments don't like vacations too?

Then he say something about well you earn over such and such a figure and I was like but wait he like he know very much bout my business affairs and while dat might be true I already explain to y'all my dollar situation. Is the wife that got de money not me. Anyway I still want to know where he get those figures from cause he like he was doing my income tax or something so. Boy this thing sounding real fishy to me.

So after some prodding I found out that the only stipulation for the vacation is that on the second day they want you to come to a 90 minute presentation. 90 minute presentation? Ding Ding ding!! More bells, alarms and gunshots going off in my head now than your average dancehall cd. They trying to sell me something I don't want. Nuh uh, I'm going to decline this offer tempting as it may seem.

Cause I've been to one of these things before and they were pushing these 10 and 20 thousand dollar packages at me and were getting upset because I say I not interested. But that's another story.

Plus the guy was like you can come up on September 8th or September 15th. So wait you just call me to offer me a vacation package and I supposed to drop everything to rush along on this vacation just like that? Who tell he that I available in September? He feel I don't work nowhere that I could just up and galavant bout the place so? Looka, I is a busy man, I cant just drop everything just on his say so and go on vacation. I got work, family commitments, blogs to write and the like. Bwoy him feisty and rude eh hey? Trying to presume to schedule my business or rather my vacation. I cant even remember ever offering him the position of Jdid social director if such a position existed and yet my man trying to plan my life. Well well well!

Oh and happy birthday to Kami

Trauma

This was actually my anniversary post since I figured I'd start the new year off with a good laugh at my expense.

Squash. Sigh! I love the game. Now I wasn't sure I was going to tell this story at all since well you'll probably see why once its told. Actually I like to sort of put a moratorium on certain stories if they happened too recently but well this one I think was just too traumatic for me to hold out. This is part of the healing process. Plus I tried it out on a few friends a week ago and they were absolutely bawling at my expense so I figured why not share it so the rest of you guys can also get a good laugh at me.

Well truth be told I had an incident on the squash court a while back and this event was so traumatic that I stopped playing squash for a bit. But a few weeks ago I started going back out to play so the healing process must have started.

Ok enough hoopla I wont build the story up to be more than it is. So where do I start? Well I've mentioned in previous blogs that I play squash. Its quite a nice sport in my opinion, great for keeping in shape if a bit hard on the knees but I guess one of its appeals to me is that its an individual sport. Yes I am definitely not the proverbial team player. Must be that whole raised as an only child phenomenon.

So I've been playing the sport (in between injuries) since the spring of 2002 and I think know my game has improved quite a bit since I first started and had to struggle with getting that hand eye coordination thing to come back to me.

Now usually I play with these two friends who taught me the game and initially they royally kicked my butt for about a year but now I can hold my own and win a few. So early this year I was hanging around the courts with my friends, taking a breather while they played, when this older lady came up to me and asked me if I wanted to knock the ball around on another court. Now when I say older I think this lady could be in her 50s or so.

I said sure, why not and we went to another court and for about 10 minutes just knocked around the ball. It was good exercise. Later her husband came over. He's this older guy who's been playing for years so he's a pro and he was watching and giving us pointers. Actually for some reason the guy reminds me of the Lloyd Bridges character in that Seinfeld episode where Jerry's dad hired him as a personal trainer for Jerry. Anyone remember that?

Anyway we all chatted a little bit and it turned out that both myself and the lady work in the same area and she said she needed some practice to improve her game and since I was closer to her level than some of her other squash partners she asked if we could play on the occasional lunchtime. I said sure since I was always open to getting in as much time on the squash court as possible trying to stay fit and to improve my game.

So we started playing once a week at lunchtimes. At first it was just working on various shots and stuff and I found that I took more chances with my stroke play, playing lots of shots out of position or not moving to the ball until relatively late. Just working on my speed or playing closer to the front wall to see how good my reflexes were when the ball comes screaming off the wall towards me. Plus I was trying to change some stances I had picked up in the hope that like with Tiger Woods changing his swing technique it would eventually pay off and make me a better player. It was sort of like a self discovery squash mission for me as I was teaching myself how to play tough shots in difficult scenarios that I would probably face against tougher competition.

Now the only issue with that is that I wasn't feeling very competitive most of the times as we played as I was just kind of trying to find my limitations on certain shots so on most occasions I played mainly to her level. Think I mentioned this a while back.

So occasionally this lady would think that she was ready to give me a run for the money and she would challenge me to a game and most times I would show no mercy when it was game time. I'm not as bad as Humanity Critic with the 60 year old guy playing basketball or maybe I was but I just felt that I had to show her that she still wasn't ready to beat me on the court.

So about two or three months back, my boys weren't really playing a lot of squash anymore and I started to play two sometimes three times a week with this lady to keep in shape. We started playing more and more games and although I still wasn't playing flat out I was still making sure that the games weren't close. She was improving but so was I. I think so there were still lots of 9-0s, 9-1s and 9-2s.

Now the thing about squash is that it can be a fairly dangerous sport. Its played in a small enclosure and there is always the possibility of some sort of entanglement with the opposition. Now playing with this lady I realized that she has this tendency to come in a tad bit too close on occasions when I'm making a shot in the middle of the court so I have to be really careful not to hit her and we've had a few kind of close misses. And its like she tends to sneak up on me too sort of like the big haired lady who ruined my perfect photo just appearing from out of nowhere at the last minute. Oh maybe its that I'm so focused on the ball that I'm not watching her movements and I only realize at the last minute that she has come close, close up under me like she is a chossel (that's a bajan term for girlfriend).

Oh I should also mention that the lady is like the energizer bunny, we can play for 40 minutes to an hour and she doesn't tire at all, its pretty incredible. So the day in question we were playing and had already gone for a good 40 minutes already and I was getting antsy to get back to work and grab a sandwich. More water was running off me than if I had just been caught in a torrential downpour and I man was well tired just ready to go take a shower and head back to the office.

So we had played a few games already and one or two had been a bit closer than usual. I think it was just one of those days where I didn't have a lot of energy. She had rushed out to a 3-0 or 4-0 lead in a couple of games before I really started to go but I would still win before she reached 5 or 6.

Anyway we are already past our playing time but she insists on one last game. I'm pretty fatigued but I said ok. So she comes out still unflagging in her efforts and I'm sort of half assed about the whole thing. She gets to 3-0, then its 4-0 and I'm like ok wake up Jdid time to play. Just put in an effort, kick her butt and you can go. Then she reaches 5-0 and I'm like wait a minute but it still doesn't register that she can beat me, then 6-0 and I'm thinking I've never been beaten by this lady ever and now she's going to beat me at love. Oh hell no!

So I'm focused man! Time to play serious squash. I'm concentrating on the ball but I'm guessing seeing the score has energized the lady even more than usual because she is making some phenomenal gets everytime I break her serve and serve for a point. So it stays at about 6-0 for awhile and I'm still drained but now focused. Oh oh 7-0! How did that happen? Lucky shot on her part I think! Oh man she's seriously going to win and not only that but win at love. Oh I'm never going to live this down.

We stay on 7-0 for a while cause I'm giving it my all like fighting to the last man. No surrender no retreat, take no prisoners. Except some games you just don't get the bounce and this one seems to be one for me. So now its 8-0.

Last chance J-did. Do or die time! Last shot to get out of love and at least regain some small crumb of respect. So with luck I break her serve and I serve for a point only I serve too hard and its out and its back to her again looking for game point. The pressure is on.

8-0, she serves. Nice serve in the corner, I return it, she hits it back. I get a decent attempt at a kill shot but she's there to drop it in the corner, I get to it and make a good shot and she finally makes a mistake on the other side of the court leaving me open for a shot to at least stop her from winning this point. Ah ha finally something is going my way! The ball is traveling at super speed but its all like its in slow motion for me. I watch the ball as it hits the side wall, I pivot and get ready to turn in a brute of a kill shot.

Meanwhile she's nowhere near me or so I think cause last I saw she was still in the corner. So I focus and watch the ball off the wall and hand and racquet become one as I get ready to beat kill this ball, just hit the crap out of it. In cricket venacular I seeing the ball big like a breadfruit and I gine lash this one for six! My arm is cocked and I'm starting the downward stroke when what the ?? Where the hell did she come from? She's suddenly right in the path of my racquet. Abort shot, abort, abort!

So still all in slow motion I try as much as possible to take some of the energy out of my racquet-arm combo and ease up on the shot but too much momentum has already been imparted to the racquet and its impossible to stop the shot now. The lady seeing she is in danger is now attempting to duck like an English batsmen facing Malcolm Marshall (R.I.P).

WHAPAX! Racquet still with considerable force hits the lady in the side of the head and she drops down Bruggadown! like a log holding the side of her head. Oh No! See me now eyes open wide with fear. Either she got a concussion or I kill the white woman. Jdid ya gine jail, I should run to the border, change my identity, get plastic surgery, grow a jerri curl, I must FLED!

Cuhdear what kind of man beats up on a poor innocent older lady with a squash racquet. I can see the news already, that Jdid fella is a vicious black criminal, he want deporting, (I hear 'im from Jamaica cause ya know every black man in Toronto that do something bad duz got to be Jamaican right) attacking a poor white lady, he want lossing way in jail. Look how the woman aint trouble he, all she was doing was beating him in squash and he takes the squash racquet and lash the woman just so for no apparent reason. He could only be a sick sick fella, mad in he head.

Well luckily the lady stood up proving she wasn't dead but I aint out of the woods yet cause they could get me for assault with a deadly weapon. Time to seriously start growing that Jerri Curl and get that face change. She is clutching the side of her head like she is in serious pain and I'm beyond terrified. What damage did I do to her head?

I'm shouting 'Are you ok, are you ok, are you ok?'

And then I realize she's actually holding specifically her ear. 'Are you bleeding, is anything broken?' Still no answers from the lady as she slowly moves around trying to shake off the blow.

And then it happened! She cocked the ear she was holding to a side and lo and behold all I see was plop! plop! Two flesh like parts drop out the woman ear. Oh shoot Jdid, ya sure to go to jail now I panicked! Look how ya went and hit the woman in her head so hard that ya brek she ear bones. Breaking of earbones will give ya 3 to 5 in maximum security. Look how you cause all sort of fracture of the malleus and the pinna and them sorta things to the extent that they un-hinge and drop out she ear. Ya Ever see something hard and flesh covered drop out somebody ear? Trust me people it was one of the most traumatic things I ever experience.

Ear bones fragile ya know and you with your brute force gone and lik up the woman head so. Wicked wicked Jdid! It was an accident I'm silently screaming but who's going to believe that.

Anyway it turned out it was just a hearing aid and the lady was fine. I had no idea she had a hearing aid but what a relief that I didn't cause any permanent damage cause I man too pretty for jail.

Still I was totally traumatized by the experience and I didn't play for quite a while after that.

And the joke was everyone I told the story to hoping for some sympathy were bawling their head off at how I break the woman hearing aid. Even de wife who I called first thing I got back to the office just stand up and laugh in my ear on the phone. Then some bajan fellas I know was telling me things like 'boy Jdid, I din realize you was such a vicious fella beating up on the handicapped and senior citizens and tings so. You like you is a dangerous fella wid nuff pent up rage. We gine have to send you to anger management.'

See what I mean absolutely no sympathy.

I've played with the lady since and I think I was more traumatized by the event than she was. She was making jokes about it and didn't seem too disturbed at all. Meanwhile I'm still having nightmares about body parts dropping out of peoples ears. But oh well I'm trying to recover.

Praises be

To the most high God.

I've written a lot over the years but it was one year ago while watching something that I considered rather funny on the Olympics that I decided hey instead of just emailing my friends about it why not start one of these blog thingies. And so Doan Mind Me was born.

Must say back then I didn't know how big the blog world was and I really only knew about Yammie and Kami's blog but I decided to give this blogging thing a try.

Well what can I say its been an up and down year but I think I like what's become of this blog. It still sort of escapes definition in my opinion. Just the rants of a black man raised in the west indies, living in the t.dot who loves hip hop and black music in general and just says whatever comes into his head. Crazy ol Jdid's thoughts. Hope you enjoy them.

So respect due to Yammie, Kami, Dr D and Mad Bull and the other Caribbean bloggers who came before me and paved the way and of course respect due to everyone out there in blogland who has stopped by and whose blogs I frequent. I love y'all! Man are there some talented people out there. Too may to name. Sometimes you guys stop me cold in my tracks like whoa why am I here filling up the internet with crap when you guys are so intelligent and write so well. But oh well, I've never been one to dwell on comparisons, I'm just doing my thing and I respect y'all for doing your thing. You may influence me at times but I write like Jdid and no-one else and I aint down with copying you or wont be overawed by your style cause that's just how I be. I'm a just respect yours and give you love.

But yea I think the blog collective is a mighty cool set of folk and I admire y'all and try to keep up with your writing as best I can. Doesn't it feel sometimes like we know each other? Doesn't it feel like we are friends. People who I've never met. I mean if I don't see certain folk blog for a while I get sort of worried about them hoping nothings happened to them. Man that's sort of scary aint it.

And its weird too how I find so many ideas like my own in blogs. I guess blog minds think alike, lol. Maybe a study needs to be conducted on the characteristics of folks who blog.

Anyway back to the subject at hand. Thanks to all my friends who have actually read my blog as well cause I know I told most of you but I think for the most part you've ignored this place. Oh well, I aint doing it for wunnah anyways. :-) Just exactly why am I doing this I wonder? The verdicts still out I think but its probably just for the pure love of writing and to see what I can come up with and if I can keep this up.

Oh and respect to the folks I dont know who also read and dont comment. Try and say sumting nuh man! Lol, thanks for stopping by, hope you like it.

When I started I didn't think this thing would last 6 months but hey a year later and we still going strong. Well not really that strong lately due to work and other constraints but we nuh dead yet so that's something to be happy about. Must give thanks.

So yea props to everyone, too many names to call and I'm afraid I'd offend someone. Thanks for your support and I'm going to try to step up my game for the year. Bless!

Come say Hi to the bad guy

Unfinished thoughts here.

So I'm thinking I need some sort of image makeover.

Why? Well I keep running into these situations where folks are scared of me, scared of my reaction, scared of what I'll say or do and hence kind of avoiding me or just keeping a really low profile around me. No I'm not talking about the usual white fear of a black man thing I'm actually talking about people who I know or should know me pretty well.

Yet they fear me.

I'd rather be feared than loved because the fear lasts longer
Fat Joe - Who Shot ya remix.

that's all well and good if there was something to fear about me but I'm trying to figure out what it is about me that would make these folks fearful. Its not like I've got crazy clout like the Godfather and its not like I'm a vengeful psychopathic killer or anything. In fact if anything I'd say I have a tendency to be too nice. I go with the whole anger is one letter away from danger angle so I try to be cool, calm and collective even in some severely testing situations.

Stuff I could and probably should have blow up at I've let slide without even raising my voice. I've seethed a lot but its basically been an internal thing, I rarely let people see that they have offended, angered or annoyed me.

So what's this whole fear thing about?

I have no idea

And the fear thing makes me afraid too. I'm afraid that it's being thrown at me so much that I will actually embrace the role, like black kids who are told they will never amount to 'nuttin'. I will become the bad guy, the person to be afraid of. I will start playing that role. Yea so that scares me quite a bit.

So what is it about me that's evokes this emotion. I'm not quite sure. Maybe its the whole quiet vibe thing that I give off, maybe because they cant read me, maybe its a fear of the unknown.

Maybe these people have done me something wrong that I'm not aware of or that they fear I know and will retaliate on and so that's why they are running from me like Tokyo' residents from Godzilla.

The funny thing is its not an altogether unfamiliar situation for me cause growing up I saw the same ish happen to my dad. Folks were and still are sort of afraid of him. Yet, to me, he's like the coolest, joke-cracking, person I know. Maybe its because I'm not quick to be all happy happy joy joy with anyone. Sorry that's not my steelo. I'm reserved, I gotta feel you out first, feel the vibe, make a connection first.

But still I aint talking about first time acquaintances here, they could be forgiven for showing some trepidation but these are people who've known me for years and who I've never done any wrong to.

Yea I'm hardheaded, yes I refuse to be pushed around, yes I will tell you if you messed up, yes I will call you if I think you're trying to play me. But I'm not loud, aggressive or threatening by any means in the manner that I do these things. So why the fear? Forget a image makeover! If what I do makes me a bad guy then hey what can I say 'come say hi to the bad guy'.

We jumpin up

Start jumping up
is de road callin!
jumpin up start jumping up

dead or alive
still we coming, still we coming
2005!
still we coming, still we coming

Dead or Alive - Shurwayne Winchester

All I have to say about that is that song is truly a big tune! And it sweet sweet sweet on pan. Played it on the road Saturday at Hamilton Carnival. Yea I know the Canadian massive saying Hamilton duz have carnival? While the rest of you guys are saying who or where is this Hamilton place.

Well the City of Hamilton is about an hour and a half west of Toronto. Its a city in name but in truth it really felt like a small town. Wont go into too much detail on Hamilton cause to be honest I don't know much about it except it had/has a lot of steel mills and is pretty much a blue collar type city/town from what I've heard.

Anyway dem duz have a carnival every year a week after Caribana and so our pan-band went down to perform.



Now let me tell ya this. Hamilton carnival is small small small. Is like 3 mas bands from Toronto, a steel band and strangely enough some Chinese falun gong, falun dala folks leading off the parade. Don't ask me I don't know what's up with that.

So yes I saw the same costumes again including my favorite

Plus some I don't think I had gotten close to at Caribana.





All in all though I must say I had so much fun on the road. Especially since we jammed Shurwayne's Dead or Alive and KMC's First Experience for a considerable part of our journey. Sweet sweet soca!

Surprising to me actually was the fact that we were on the road for probably close to an hour if not more. I was expecting a two block parade but we actually went a fair way on the road.

Oh and we had quite a crowd following us too.


Is it me or is this post sounding like a C+ what I did on my summer vacation type essay? I hate that!

Anyways after the parade we went to Bayshore Park for the rest of the carnival. Its sort of a Fair type vibe; some rides, music, food etc. It was a pretty good lime but I man was well tired so for a couple of hours I ditched the rest of the band and I was down on a park bench by the yachts holding a serious snooze with the ducks and geese as my company. I was snoring hard ya kno! lol

that's the view from the bench.


Later on I went back to the crowds and enjoyed the sounds of Moses Revolution and New Jenerashun. The music wasn't bad and of course there was your usual 'wining' contest and some other fun. This time it was a Vincie guy and a St Lucian girl who were the ones really bringing it on stage. My my my! that's all I can say.

Here's a photo of the crowd.


and then the sun set and we left



Ok definitely this was probably the worse blog I've ever written. Too much of a what I did during the summer vibe. Just couldn't salvage it. I apologize. Oh well I hope the pictures are at least ok.

Eediat Ting dat!

Eediat dat dat dat dat Eediat ting dat!

Well I had promised to make Eediat ting dat a near regular event but it didn't seem to work. Last one I did was here.

However I came across this article today when I was trying to relax (haven't been home much so that's the main reason I haven't blogged since last Tuesday night) that I just needed to talk about.

Now Kami already spoke about the guy who supposedly killed his 3 year old son for being gay. That would have probably been worthy for an Eediat ting dat mention too but she beat me to it.

This story I want to speak on I read in this week's Sports Illustrated and can also be found here.

In case you don't read the link or you just want me to break it down here goes.

Allegedly on June 27th this year, in Uniontown Pennsylvania, this Tee ball team made the playoffs. Now the rules of this Tee ball thing said that every child on your team who showed up for a game had to play at least 3 innings. So there was this one child on the team, Harry, who was autistic and suffers from mild mental retardation. Apparently the coach didn't want him to play probably because playing said child might ruin the teams chances of winning (its not said so I assuming).

So the coach when he announced the playoffs didn't even tell Harry's mother about it cause he didn't want the child to show up. However the parent found out and brought Harry to the game. So what ya think my man the coach do?

In warmup the coach got the hardest throwing pitcher on his side and asked him to warm up with Harry. Then he pulls this boy aside and tells him to hit Harry in the face so he cant play today and offers the pitcher 25 dollars if he does that. Imagine that!

Well first ball. Whapax! The pitcher hits poor Harry in the groin sending him crying to his mom. But the mom sent Harry back to play and the coach told the pitcher to hit him harder. Well wuhloss! The second ball the pitcher let lose nearly kill my yout Harry. Cuhdear! It hit him in the left side of the face and ear drawing blood (that reminds me of another story which I'm planning for the 14th). The coach then told Harry's mother that it looks like Harry is unlucky today so he should just sit this one out.

Well I'm not sure what happened next but somehow or the other Harry's mom found out what the coach had done, went to the police and now the coach, one Mark Downs, is answering charges of criminal solicitation to commit aggravated assault, corruption of minors, criminal conspiracy to commit assault and reckless endangering of another person.

A wha kinda eediat ting dat!

Ya mean to tell me that a man could be so cruel that he would try to knock down a handicapped child so. Man I feel this fellow don't need no years in prison he need some lashes with the cat-o-nine. If there is one case where I think punishment should involve some sort of pain its this one.

As I was thinking about this though I say to myself if that was my child involved, that coach would have to pray to God I didn't kill him. But that got me thinking. You know that Harry's mother aint West Indian cause if Harry's mom was West Indian boy there is no doubt in my mind that liks wudda share. Somebody would get seriously beat down. Harry's mother would be the one in court charged cause the coach would have been beat down! She and the father and the family would have rush up on the coach and demand 'satisfaction'.

My West Indian people know bout 'satisfaction'? I not talking bout Mick Jagger and dem so ya know. Satisfaction is what we call it in Barbados when someone does you or someone close to you wrong and you demand recourse or retribution for the act that was perpetrated.

'I come fa satisfaction!'

So when I was growing up, and say a school teacher for no apparently reason administered an especially severe beating on your child with a strap or a bamboo to an extent that left marks on ya child skin or cut him/her or something like that you would see the child's parents mostly mothers rush up to the school the next day and go to the headmaster and demand 'satisfaction'. (now this is if they felt that the teacher was unjustified in the beating cause if they thought the beating was justified the child was probably in for more liks at home) Something had to be done and wuhloss if the fathers or other family members got involved cause 'satisfaction' was going to be had one way or another be it a simple apology or somebody getting their tail cut.

Same thing if another child beat up your child. The parent of the child who got beaten up would go to the other child's parents and demand satisfaction. An eye for an eye sort of justice I guess.

Boy I remember when I was like 8 or 9 and that girl lik me cross my forehead wid a two by four and had me wid a big big bump on my forehead that used to get into the room about two minutes ahead of the rest of my face. My mudda was cruel, and vex and rush to the gal parents one time and demand 'satisfaction' for knocking what little sense her child had out of his head. Oh for those interested I told that full story here last year.

It was a matter of standing up because you didn't want anyone taking advantage of or as we would say 'unfairing' your child. Ya had to show them that the child aint an orphan and if ya mess with them then somebody would step up and stand up or 'represent' them.

So I can just imagine if this was in the West Indies what would have happened if the parents had found out that this coach had deliberately ordered another child to throw at their son. I can see a 'fyah-go-lash' type mother running up to confront this man while dragging along the poor child by his arm with a glowering father and possibly at least a grannie and an igrant unemployed uncle in tow. She's gesturing and pointing at the child's injuries, cussing and demanding satisfaction and the coach is denying the incident while trying to back away looking for a chance to run but the father is a big fellow that ready to lash him and the igrant uncle, that always one step from jail, only hoping to God that this man run cause he ready to throw two belly searchers from the word go. (a belly searcher is a cuff in ya guts, a cuff well a cuff is a punch lol, I gine have wunnah talking bajan by year end lol)

Anyway boy I hope this coach fellow get what is coming to him if they find him guilty.

How do you write?

I'll be back with one or is that two more Caribana related posts but I don't feel like writing about that now. So here is a question to all of my fellow bloggers who read this. How do you write?

Do you have to be relaxed to write, must there be burning issues for you to write about, where does your creative spark come from? Do you write at a certain spot, listen to music as you write, light candles, drink alcohol, smoke illegal substances? What drives you?

I'm just wondering because I was doing some exercises a few weeks back at a gathering which were supposed to get you relaxed so that you could be creative and write and for me it was an abject failure. Why? Cause I don't relax before I write, its more like the opposite I write to relax. I kind of follow that old Chuck D line from Terrordome 'When I get mad I put it down on a pad'. Like even if I'm not upset I'm still a bit tense and I have these things I need to say and as they come seeping out of my brain onto the written page then I can feel more comfortable and just sort of chill. This is especially true of my poetry. Writing for me is an outlet. If I relax before I start typing then nothing really happens because I'm likely to just be like let me go watch TV or chat online or something.

And I can pretty much write anywhere but I prefer no music, no outside stimuli to affect what I'm doing. Just ambient noises and I don't like people trying to have conversations with me when I'm trying to sort out something I'm writing which is probably why most of my blogs and other stuff are written when my wife isn't around.

So yea the relaxation business naa work fa de I. I'm just too tense and stressed out an individual to really relax first before writing I guess. I work from a position of must say what I got to say, even if its not really that important or useful, must work franticly under self imposed deadlines. Must just get thoughts out of head onto paper.

So how do you approach writing?

Ah still vex

Ya really, really want to know why?

I mean yes, I had a nice Caribana and all but yes I'm still upset about the one that got away. And no I don't mean the Vincy girls on the truck that I was trying to follow when Bajansistren keep reminding me I actually had a band to jump with. No I not even talking about them.

Picture this. Caribana 2005, ladies in abundance, all sizes, all shapes, all shades, all ages, skimpy costumes, beauty, color, cellulite, curves. To paraphase the old time bajan spouge duo the Draytons 'Who aint looking good, good looking and who aint looking nice, nice looking, who aint looking nice in front, looking nice behind....'. You get the point.

Alright then. One good thing about music when it hits you ya feel no pain. Well the rhythms were hitting so hard it was like somebody give all of us Codeine tablets. The Caribbean rhythms; the soca, the pan, the drum were causing bodies to gyrate and shake and move and sway and jump and sweat. You just couldn't resist it. Sweet soca music , ya coulda neva refuse it!.

It was a veritable cornucopia for the senses.

Your boy, Jdid, that's me, just enjoying the sounds and the sights and taking beaucoup de pictures thinking to himself wow this really is a spectacle to behold. I'm not the best photographer and on most occasions I just take pictures of things not people but Caribana is different you have to get photos of the people to celebrate the event. Plus I was not too sure how these photos would turn out after having failed miserable to take anything useful at Pan Alive Friday night. A new camera will do that you.

So earlier in the day before the jump-off, I was focusing on getting photos of the big King and Queen costumes like this.

and



(Oh previous two photos compliments of Bajansistren. Thank you very much. See previous blog if you missed the other photos).

Then as the parade started I began getting pictures of the bands as they left the stadium to hit the parade route on Lakeshore. Best place to take photos in my opinion because once stuff gets on the roads things start to get mash up and spectators join in with the bands and it kind of dilutes a bit of the color intensity of say seeing one band section all in blue like the photo below.



So I'm doing my photo thing when along comes this group of lovely young ladies (another set not the Vincy ones on the truck).

Hey where did that photo come from? To wife: umm no I don't remember taking those photos it must have been the guy I lent the camera too. Yea that's it lol. la la la ........la la

Anyway sorry I digress, so these nice looking young ladies are going past me and there are a few of them with Caribbean flags including one rather stunning beauty with a Bajan (that's short form for Barbados for the uninitiated) flag who I focused in on. Ok she maybe wasn't that stunning, (she was rather good looking though) but after what happened next and forever in the stories I will tell in the future she will always be the best-est looking girl I ever saw. I will be singing her praises with hyperbolic terms of exaltation, extolling her to the highest degree, her aura will be raised to mythical proportions. A girl who would make Halle Berry look like Whoopie as my man Big L (R.I.P) would say.

Now there she goes again the dopest Ethiopian
and now the world around me is just moving in slow motion

So guess what happens next. The sista with the Bajan flag is passing by and another beautiful lady with a Jamaican flag (although not as beautiful as the angel with the bajan flag) is pulling her along when she, the bajan flag girl not the Jamaican flag girl, sees me with the camera and stops. Hallelujah! Could it be? Is she stopping to pose for lil ol me? Nooo! Yess! Nooo! Really! Me? Whoa! She is actually posing for me. Oh man if I ever had any doubts about there being a God in heaven. Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah! No more singing the Pharcyde's passing me by cause she's the one who didn't pass me by.

Oh man, I'm on cloud 9, I have hit the jackpot! If I don't take another shot all day and even if I don't get to follow the Vincy truck then to actually have this girl pose for me just makes my day, strike that my week, my month even my year. This is the coup de grace, my shot heard around the world, my crowning glory. This was the photo in the future I'd be showing my kids, my grandkids, everybody saying can you believe what happened to me out of the blue and can you believe how lovely this young lady is.

So quickly, in the next few seconds, I manage to steady my hands and I set up the shot. Ok Jdid, steady now. You definitely don't want this one to come out blurry like the ones the night before. This shot must be perfect. Perfect girl, perfect shot, I'm focused, the camera is focused, we become as one, man and machine blending into the perfect element. The camera's lenses combining with my own eye's lenses to form a cybernetic entity. Coming together for a common cause for the betterment of mankind. (alright too much hyperbole I'm getting carried away) Ok here it comes, everything is good, homegirl is in the center of the picture, I double check everything is straight and I depress the camera button to take the shot. I hear the double click meaning I'm good to go and I depress the button fully and snap what is possibly naa scratch that what is definitely the greatest shot I have ever take in my life. Hey I'm easy to please what can I say. Oh happy day!

I say a heart felt thank you and 'God bless you girl' and the girls are off. I was happy before but my heart is all a flutter, I'm positively giddy. Giddy as a schoolgirl well as giddy as an emotionless android like myself can be anyways. Yea I have emotion issues but that's a whole other blog.

Then I look at the picture and it all falls down like a Kanye West song.



There on the left is the Jamaican flag girl, quite beautiful in all rights but wait what the? Nooooooooo I scream! Whyyyyyyyy? Where is my bajan flag girl in all her exquisite beauty? Nooooooo!

Yo where that big headed woman come from to block my shot! Cheese on bread (bajan term of exclamation, don't ask I have no idea of the origin)! I utter various unprintable words. A who de one bleep bleep big red frizzy headed woman and where she came from to block my shot? My perfect shot in ruins! Ruined I say!

Bajansistren had been standing next to me and I show her the photo and she laffin at me, I show the wife she laffin at me. Everybody enjoying my misery. Cuhdear. To have it so close to your grasp only to have it cruelly snatched away.

Totally offset the rest of my day. To think I had the best-est girl in the universe to take a picture of and that woman head block out all trace of my girl. See dat, life just not fair.

Not only that but homegirl had already disappeared down the route and so I was left there with only a memory and once again a brother's singing a variation of the Pharcyde's Passing me by. Damn!