Yea Baby!

Causin lyrical disasters, it's the master
Make music for Mini-Me's, models and Fat Bastards
These women tryin to get me out my Pelle Pelle
They strip off my clothes and tell me, "Get in my belly!"
Stay on the track, hit the ground runnin like Flo-Jo
Sent back in time and I've never lost my mojo
Ladies and gentlemen ahh, boys and girls
Ludacris sent down to take over the whole world!

Number 1 spot - Ludacris

For some reason I just like this song. Maybe its the Soul Bossa Nova sample from Quincy Jones that Luda uses or the way that he manages to inject like a "million, ga-zillion, fa-fillion" Austin Powers lines like "fazha fazha and hey I love gold" and "shag now and shag later...". Mind you I know that my Canadian people might remember that Dream Warriors rocked that same sample back in the day to some acclaim with "My Definition of a Boombastic Jazz Style" but hey that was like 89 or 90 wasn't it so most folks probably don't even remember that. Oh well!

Today I'm just going to chat about a few lil things that come to mind nothing too serious. Got this email from the Air Canada Center's (ACC) mailing list (no idea how I got on it mind you) today advertising some big upcoming reggae show featuring Coco Tea, Elephant Man , Lady Sow and Buju Bantan. I had to pause for a minute Lady who and buju who? Cuhdear I mean she doan actually get on like nuh lady but now wunnah calling she Lady Sow, wuhloss. Next thing dem wud be telling me is featuring a wuman dat duz behave like a hog. Serious ting dat! Not that I saying Lady Saw duz act like a hog mind ya, I kinda like her music a bit but I don't understand how big corporate people could send out a big email wid de people names spell wrong so. I bet if it was Shania Twain or sumbody so I wouldn't get nuh email saying Shania Twin or Shania Twang nor nuttin so. Chupse!

Also I remember the last time I went to the ACC I saw a sign saying no gang colors allowed inside. I've also been seeing this sign at other places in Toronto which is all well and fine .....except.... nuhbody neva tell me exactly what these so called gang colors are in Toronto. I mean if you gine put up a big able sign saying no gang colors allowed you mekkin a big assumption that it is well known to all and sundry what these specific gang colors are. I would counter that such is not the case and that these signs need to be more specific. And not just because they don't want me to wear gang colors to enter their establishment but just as a public service to stop innocent people from mistakenly putting on gang colors and getting into trouble. I mean suppose now I put on my black and green pinstripe polkadot shirt wid de pink collar and it just so happen that that is a gang color. Next ting ya know I walking down the road and some pieca idiot shooting at me and wunnah hear I pushing up daisies.

Ah pushing up daisies slang for ya dead and buried 6 feet deep. Slang isn't it amazing how slang has really penetrated our everyday speech? What duz really get me is when someone really uncharacteristic starts using slang or its used in places that just shock you. For instance boy I remember when tv sports reporters discover Jamaican slang in the form of Booyaka! Oh gosh boy I couldn't turn on a sports channel without hearing some idiot saying something like "Jordan on the break and Booyaka!" To be honest I found it rather annoying. I blame Shabba doah, if he din going on about "booyaka booyaka its Shabba Rankin" in Trailor Load a Girls nun a this wudda happen.

But the worse is when somebody using slang and they don't really know what it mean or people around them don't really know what it mean. Like sometimes these people duz use the slang and the radio and tv people really don't know that they using curse words and playing it nuff. I remember there was this terrible rapper named Mc Brains back in like 90 or 91 who had a bit of a minor hit called "oochie coochie la la la" and in the middle of the song the man used ta buss out wid 'gimme de punnany, punnany, punnany!" and I used to see this video all over the place up hayso and think a wha kinda slackness dat. Boy if these tv people ever knew what this man was really singing on their stations this song would have some serious bleeps all in it or nuff people would be calling in to complain about how them corrupting the moral fabric. Cuhdear.