Bits n Pieces

Haven't actually felt like writing lately so here's some filler to hold you for a bit

(1) The Toronto Sun's been running this series on Sunday about Jane n Finch. Not a big fan of the Sun but the series has been decent so far.

(2) I didn't really get the point of Earth Hour to be honest. And what I didn't get even more was Toronto holding a concert downtown during Earth Hour. Ok so maybe they can operate all the equipment on portable generators but what was the point of the television stations carrying the concert live. Oh we're carrying this concert for you to watch on TV even though you're supposed to turn off all your lights and just read books by candlelight or go on moonlight walks. Duhh!

(3) Speaking of books David Chariandy's Soucouyant is an excellent read. Many books fizzle near the end as the writers seem to struggle to figure out how to end properly, sort of like a Saturday night live skit, but Chariandy does a good job of keeping the interest right until the end. To be honest I thought he had fallen into that pitfall somewhere around page 140 of the 200 page novel when something major happened but he really kept the story lively and didn't just drag the book out like some writers do.

(4) Since I mentioned Saturday Night Live, Mad TV had a really funny skit about a woman who stands by her cheating politician husband a la Spitzer's wife. It was hilarious. Hopefully someone will post it on Youtube soon.

(5) On that topic of Spitzer whats with this new dude Patterson who replaced him? For a legally blind dude he sure has a lot of skeletons in the closet. First he admitted to having an affair awhile back when his marriage was on the rocks now he's admitted to doing marijuana and coke back in the day. I've heard of being honest but damn son leave something for the press to find out nuh man. Whats he going to admit to next? Does he know who killed Kennedy? Is he down with Bin Laden? Boy try and keep ya mout shut and stop telling people all ya personal business so. All I know is the man is shutting down potential scandals by revealing all from the get go.

(6) And speaking of scandals, man was this month the month for political scandal and trouble. My man Obama went from smooth sailing to battling to let people know that he wasn't some sort of black extremist due to this whole thing with his pastor's preaching. I'll be honest I didn't really think what was said in the sermons was that bad. Dude said what a lot of black folks think and its not like he said these things out of context as the sound bites would have you believe. Check more of his sermons where the more controversial comments came from and see how they fell within the boundaries of his speech. Its not Rev. Wright just out of the blue started to glower and cuss and damn the U.S without reason. Dude was making valid scripture points. Anyway I found this article here which speaks about the double standard applied to Wright, a black preacher, compared to some of the white preachers out there. Its been silly how some of the commentators have behaved about this thing.

(7) And finally this has got to be one of the dumbest things I've ever heard of. Dude in Missouri is installing his satellite tv, needs to make a hole in the side of the house for some sort of connection, tries and tries but cant get the hole made so what does he do. No he doesn't go to his neighbour and ask to borrow a drill. Nope dude takes out his .22 and tries to shoot a hole in the wall. Real smart right? But wait it gets worse. He doesn't realize that his wife who was helping him with the installation has gone back inside the house and the bullet accidentally strikes and kills her.

From my perspective he's either the dumbest man who ever lived or the smartest cause if he had planned on knocking off his wife no one is going to believe this is anything but an accident. As it stands though I think the man was just an eediat. If he doesn't get a Darwin Award this year I don't know who gets one.

Cease n Settle

I havent finished this but its quite interesting in my opinion. I can see pros and cons but still it is well, not rather unique but more a viewpoint that goes against that which most women espouse, at least in public. Click the text for the full article.


When we’re holding out for deep romantic love, we have the fantasy that this level of passionate intensity will make us happier. But marrying Mr. Good Enough might be an equally viable option, especially if you’re looking for a stable, reliable life companion. Madame Bovary might not see it that way, but if she’d remained single, I’ll bet she would have been even more depressed than she was while living with her tedious but caring husband.

What I didn’t realize when I decided, in my 30s, to break up with boyfriends I might otherwise have ended up marrying, is that while settling seems like an enormous act of resignation when you’re looking at it from the vantage point of a single person, once you take the plunge and do it, you’ll probably be relatively content. It sounds obvious now, but I didn’t fully appreciate back then that what makes for a good marriage isn’t necessarily what makes for a good romantic relationship. Once you’re married, it’s not about whom you want to go on vacation with; it’s about whom you want to run a household with. Marriage isn’t a passion-fest; it’s more like a partnership formed to run a very small, mundane, and often boring nonprofit business. And I mean this in a good way.

Update

In case you were wondering the Ryerson student who faced expulsion over running the Facebook study group (I wrote about it here) wasn't expelled.

The disciplinary panel who ruled on his case said they had no proof that his facebook study group was used for cheating. His original mark in the course was reinstated although he is to get zero on the particular assignment associated with the study group, he has to attend a workshop on academic integrity and he is getting a disciplinary notation on his record which he can appeal. You can read the full article here.

My thoughts are the University isn't man enough to say we were being asses about this but they cant full well expel him so they are trying to save face by adding the disciplinary notation and giving him zero on the assignment. He'll take it and rightly so cause he doesn't want to be expelled but the University is still in the wrong here. Big bullies!

All in all just bad press for Ryerson in an age where the grab for students by Universities is an all out war. They ended up with egg on their face, in my opinion looking silly to potential students and parents of potential students (who sometimes have a say in where their kids go. Don't believe the hype Obay is real son!)

3 am

Thought this was kind of funny. Its the cover for the March 17th issue of the New Yorker. I guess its supposed to be a fun take on the 3 am ads that Hillary was running sometime back insinuating that when the ish hits the fan Barack wouldn't know what to do. However I think you could also read other things into this cover. I wish it was one of those New Yorker back page insert your own caption cartoons actually cause I would love to see some of the responses.

I've got a few ideas but I'll keep them to myself for now. All I will say is Politics does make strange bedfellows. Maybe you guys can come up with some and put them in the comments.

----------------------

Two brothers got on the bus this morning. High school age. Wasnt paying much attention but this bit of conversation caught my attention and disturbed me.

First brother: 'I asked for money to buy a new bag and the b**** wanted to see the old one first'
Second Brother: 'yea and then she goes and spends the money on herself'

OK is it just me or do you also think the first brother could have been referring to his mother/female guardian/custodian as a b**** ?

Damn!

-----

Lebron is just too cold.

After the Cavs' loss, Stevenson said a number of things about James, including his belief that James is overrated. It was part of the trash talking the two players were involved in during the game. James said: "With DeShawn Stevenson, it's kind of funny. It's almost like Jay-Z [responding to a negative comment] made by Soulja Boy. It doesn't make sense." For those readers not cultured in hip-hop, Jay-Z is a hip-hop mogul while Soulja Boy is just a rapper.

What that should read is Jay Z has skills Soulja Boy is just garbage.

Spitzer

My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is: Reverend Lord Jdid the Funereal of Throcking by Hampton Get your Peculiar Aristocratic Title

woe is me, shame and scandal in the family
woe is me, shame and scandal in the family
Shame n Scandal - Lord Melody

From the time this Elliot Spitzer scandal broke I knew that I wanted to blog about it. The only problem was every journalist and quite a few bloggers had their say before I could get to a computer and I kept seeing my ideas in print. Beaten to the punch again. Drats!

So what to do? Should I just regurgitate what has already been written hundreds of times? I don't really like that idea but I still feel I should say something about the case so here goes. Maybe somewhere along the line I'll have an original idea.

When I heard about this case many things ran through my thoughts. I thought about how deliciously ironic and somehow sad from some aspect it was that a crusader like Spitzer who was standing up to corruption should be laid low by something like this sex scandal. It's the old adage about glass houses and stones I guess. Still I feel a certain sadness for the guy.

I also wondered what a $4,300 an hour call girl looked like? Miss Universe, Halle Berry perhaps? Nope just a regular run of the mill chick from the looks of it. No better or worse than someone you'd meet at the club I suppose. Of course after being shocked at the price (he pay hummuch for what? Dat duz come in a gold plated edition these days?)I also came to the conclusion that Spitzer was paying a premium not really for services but for discretion. Sure he could find someone cheaper but then they might go and chat out all his business and people would know his long and shortcomings so to speak. Cant have that can we.

But $80,000 on sex? Van damn! Was dude trying to price call girls out of the affordability range of the average john or to completely steal a phrase from someone on the cricket message board was he trying to touch off global pum pum inflation?

I liken it to the Kobe Bryant situation where Kobe gave his wife Vanessa a 4 Million dollar ring as part of his apology for cheating. Like that situation this exorbitant fee just somehow raises the ante for the regular joe. Hey not that I'm condoning any call girl liaisons by the way so dont get the wrong idea. Just stating facts.

I also thought that as a Governor and one who was a crusader against wrong doers Spitzer should have been more careful about the money trail which is what got him caught and actually brought to light the existence of the whole Emperor's Club call girl ring. Maybe he thought he was Steven Seagal ..... Above the Law.

And then there was the one original idea I had. Whats the deal with Spitzer's wife? I guess I wasn't the only one who found it strange that as he delivered his mea culpa she was standing next to him in support since the next day it was all the talk in the newspapers.

Not that I'm from the school that says she needed to be throwing the frying pan at him or publicly cussing him and throwing his clothing to the curb. I always believe that when it comes to marriage and that sort of relationship stuff there is always stuff that outsiders don't know so speculation is always just that speculation. She might not even leave him in the long run who knows.

No I'm not saying she should be running to the divorce lawyers all now although she is well within her right. I'm just saying that the show of public support just flies in the face of what someone who has been cheated on or who just found out something terrible about their spouse would do. I can see anger, silence, sadness, going into hiding all as the normal responses but sucking it up and standing next to this guy when in all likelihood so soon after the discovery you want to slap him across his head just seems really dyfunctional somewhat.

Or maybe she's the political equivalent of the ride or die chick. Cue the Biggie track!

But she's not the first political wife to do it and possibly not the last which leads me to wonder whether these marriages have some pre-nup clause that says I will publicly support my husband as he's going down in flames or I will get nothing in the divorce settlement. Who knows?

Anyway the one thought that really did hit home to me pretty hard about this Spitzer situation (and I haven't seen it mentioned anywhere else yet so its still original) though was the thought of spending all that money, 80,000 dollars on call girls. From my perspective it just brought into light the whole have vs have not situation cause to the average 9 to 5 person like me 80G's is a good piece of money but to Spitzer clearly this was chump change. 80Gs is more than most of us make in a year hell two years for some folk and this guy could blow that all on 20 or so hours of good times with call girls. Just like that! No sweat! 80G's most of us are thinking car note, mortgage, tuition loans, daycare bills, rent etc but to him it was probably the equivalent of buying a couple pairs of designer jeans or a few DVDs.

Says something about the economic divide of society doesnt it?

I'll leave you to ponder that while Kanye's spaceship echoes in my head "I've been workin' this grave shift and I ain't made s***, I wish I could buy me a spaceship and fly, past the sky".

Face(book) off

The scenario is as follows:(article link here)

- Last semester Student at Ryerson University starts a Facebook study group for his first year Chemistry course.
- Students sign on and exchange ideas and ask questions about homework assignments.
- Professor gets wind of Facebook group, gives student who organized group an F and charges him with academic misconduct. The argument is that the homework assignments are supposed to be done individually with no assistance from fellow students and that the Facebook group is facilitating cheating.
-Student goes before committee today facing 146 counts of academic misconduct (one for each member of his Facebook group) to determine whether he will be expelled. As I write I haven't heard the outcome.

What do you think?

My thoughts, given the available info, are that this study group is the same as a bunch of students hanging out at the library exchanging thoughts and knowledge and doing homework (except they are doing it online). Only difference is that the Professor can go online and see how they talk to each other and exchange ideas and hence charge them with cheating cause he has a paper trail.

If this is against school rules then if you've ever been doing a homework assignment gotten stuck and called your buddy at 11 o'clock to ask if he understands question 3 and ask how did he do it or what the final answer is supposed to be then you too are guilty of cheating. Way I see it that means that a lot of folks are guilty of cheating at University on homework assignments if there is to be no interaction amongst students when doing homework that they individually hand in.

Actually to go even further I think that idea goes against one of the fundamentals of what a University is really supposed to be ... a place to share knowledge. As the accused student says in the newspaper article "But if this kind of help is cheating, then so is tutoring and all the mentoring programs the university runs and the discussions we do in tutorials,"

Talking about and sharing when doing homework helps all parties involved in my opinion. Just going over the ideas and explaining them orally or in this case writing them out can open your eyes to concepts you might have missed making you a better student and more knowledgeable on the subject. Plus God knows some of these Professors cant teach worth a damn anyways.

Way I see it too, if you really don't want students talking and discussing the subject in an online forum, or by extension to my mind any sort of forum at all, the only way to deal with it is to not give homework for marks and just make the entire course's mark be based on exams, tests and quizzes done under supervision within class time.

One man's insult

Surfing the news I came upon this story here in Toronto.

Apparently in a city council session here in Toronto yesterday one councilor made some comments that were taken to be insulting to Asians and he is being asked to apologize. Councilor Rob Ford made these comments yesterday while attempting to speak on how the Asian community was expanding and doing well in the City:

"Those Oriental people work like dogs. They work their hearts out. They are workers non-stop. They sleep beside their machines. That's why they're successful in life. I went to Seoul, South Korea, I went to Taipei, Taiwan. I went to Tokyo, Japan. That's why these people are so hard workers (sic). I'm telling you, the Oriental people, they're slowly taking over."

OK now obviously he didn't mean to say that or rather he probably didn't mean to put it exactly that way but still insult? What insult? Damn I'd be happy if someone took the same quote and replaced Oriental with black and Taiwan, South Korea and Japan with a Jamaica and Barbados or a Trinidad or a Nigeria. Hell I'd be positively overjoyed even.

Damn he called us black folk hardworking. Sweet! I'd be like Ford for Mayor! You got my vote!

KnowwhatImsaying?

OK onto something else.

Toronto City Council has decided to sell a prime piece of land on Bloor Street to McDonalds for 3.3 Million dollars. Now I've followed this story with interest, and not just because it was the closest McDonalds to my residence when I was in University and I ate there a lot but also because Bloor Street property in that area is gold now and I wondered how much the city would get for it.

Now the McDonalds was working with a long term lease which was ridiculously cheap having been brokered years ago. So when the lease came up for renewal last year the city said buy the land at what its worth or give us market rate rent for this property which was about 200Gs a year instead of the $15,000 they are currently paying. Sounds fair to me.

Now the land is worth at least 5 Mil but McDonalds countered with the 3.3 Mil offer and the Toronto City Council accepted.

Now here's where the fleecing gets even worse. McDonalds has a deal in place with a developer to flip the land for 9 Mil after they buy it from the City.

What da!!

So let me get this straight. Our cash strapped city, always crying how poor it is, soon to implement users fees on garbage, always trying to close down some program or recreational facility, always raising bus fares and begging the Province for handouts and is selling this prime real estate under market value to McDonalds for 3.3 Million after which McDonalds will then turn around and flip it for a 5.7 Million dollar profit.

Are you serious? Can we afford to be doing favor for McDonalds?

Am I the only one who has a problem with that. If McDonalds can get 9 mil for the land eliminate the McDonalds middleman and go straight to the source and make more cash. I mean you are the one holding the marketable commodity in your hand use it wisely. Deal from a position of strength. Even if there is some payout to be made to McDonalds or you end up being sued I think you're still making more than the 3.3 million.

Do I really need to go down to City Council and quote them some Krs-one "

the rich get richer, cause they work towards rich
the poor get poorer, cause their minds can't switch from the ghetto
let go, it's not a novelty........
educate yourselves, make your world view bigger
visualize wealth and put yourselves in the picture!

98 lb weakling

We had a conversation last night. The wife was complaining about the gym and how people duz stare at ya an don't speak and I had to let her know that the gym is like the airport, a simile which brought the usual look of bewilderment to her face like "wuhloss now. wha stupidness this man talkin atall? He like he gine off agin". But I explain it "Dem people at the gym and at de airport duz have dem different rules to the rest of the world."

Not that I saying that a fella duz have to walk through metal detectors at the gym cause if you gym like that chances are you going to the wrong gym. No, I was merely making a comparision of places which operate outside of real world rules and ya just got to abide with what ya duz experience and not mek fuss.

Like for instance at the airport everything duz be twice as expensive to eat as anywhere else.

As soon as ya hit the airport doors is like you in a different country, where devalued currency coupled with a severe food shortage conspire to make a lil' coffee that might cost around $1.50 anywhere else not named starbucks, cost $8.50 and a sandwich wid pieca dry up roast beef or tuna an some 3 day old wilted lettuce that you wouldn't even consider taking for free let alone buying under different circumstances is about 20 dollars. Ok, well I exaggerating a lil but is juss a lil. Dem prices duz be real expensive ya hear!

God help ya if hunger ever hold ya at the airport and you aint got a snack with ya, which they catching more of we wid now since they got them oppressive rules that you cant even bring two brown mints and a pack a corn curls pass security nuhmore. Like they feel you name Mcgyver and you would tek the mint wrapper mix it with the corn curl crumbs, suck the mint and spit out fire to react with the wrapper and crumbs and produce nerve gas or something so. I neva see so much stupidness and people frighten so in my life yet. Got ya can't even carry lil water or even lil milk fa de baby past the metal detector. chupse!

So you duz be stuck there wid ya mout dry, dry, dry if ya plane get delay and all you seeing to eat is these hard up looking sandwiches and pastries that seen better days staring at you and costing summuch money that you gotta think seriously about tekkin out a mortgage to buy a meal combo. Well lets see I can afford to send the chile to College or well I cud have some juice and a lil roast beef sandwich. Decisions, decisions!

So that is the airport. The gym on the other hand got different rules too but is people rules not food rules like the airport. At the gym everybody duz stare at everybody else and then they dont acknowledge ya. And if ya stare back they duz pretend they aint staring. Or they dont stare at you directly no more but they stare at you via the mirrors.

Like they watching your every move to laff if you doing a exercise wrong or you aint lifting as much as they are or they see you doing some variation on an exercise and trying to figure out if you know what you doing or not.

All dem duz do is stare, glare and peer. Especially the jock types that always in pairs and trios fooling around and thinking they so cool and the Lou Ferrigno looking fellas that huffing and puffing, clanking bout big weights wid nuff noise to gain attention and looking like they should be named in the Mitchell Report.

The women too! Dem duz stare at ya cause they feel you should be staring at them cause nuff a dem wearing some tight up thing, trying to tantalize man by showing off navel and have assets print out so like technical drawing ya can see hidden detail and perkiness peeking at ya. Trying to catch man attention that is all them trying to do you kno. Cause if ya look carefully at the interactions is only dem sorta women so that duz get in any conversation at the gym cause they looking and certain man wid a big twinkle in him eye and a smile showing off nuff teeth duz be at the ready to sweet talk them.

Not me bosie! sweet talk who? No I, I minding my business. I doan know the meaning of sweet talk. The wife say when sweet talk was sharing I come late and all was leff was mauby bitters.

So see me, I duz sit down, wid me headphones, an do me lil weight ting and doan feel no way bout a fella. I duz juss observe the rules in effect. Dem nuh worry me, me no bother dem.

Even like today when a young girl bout half my size come in, sit down next to me and proceed to out lift me on the same shoulder press I was doing by at least 20 lbs. Chupse!

Feel I care though, feel I going strike up conversation cause look how she mekkin me look weak and small and shame muh in front a all dese big man lifting 70 nuff pounds barbells like is a roll a toilet paper? And I there scrunting and grunting with two lil foo foo weights in my hand. Chupse!

Feel I went and get heavier weights to lift cause a she? Feel I in competition wid her or what?

Naa man I juss do my thing and pretend I not seeing her. Me an my lil light weight is good enough fa me. I aint going try an outlift her and get no goadies nor ketch no hernia ya hear! I happy wid my 98lb weakling self.

Impeach the Prime minister??

Misremembered.

That's got to be the one thing I'll remember about February 2008. To me it sounded a lot like Krs-one's faux pas "un-rational" back in the day but apparently its a real word.

Yep Misremembered. There was Roger Clements, all dressed up, in front of the committee dealing with the drama related to the whole question of whether he used HGH and claiming that Petitte misremembered his claims. Yep I'll remember that cause I've followed the story not just from the sporting standpoint but to see how they would deal with him as opposed to how they are dealing with Barry Bonds. So far I'm impressed. They haven't used the kid's gloves on him. He's being investigated by the FBI now so lets see what comes of that.

Actually this entire month has been one of scandal maybe thats what I'll remember most about February 2008. Scandal!

This week in Jamaica former Energy minister Kern Spenser was jailed on corruption, fraud and money laundering charges relating to the Cuban Lightbulb scandal. Pure drama! The man had even cried in Parliament late last year. Cuhdear!

I was a bit surprised on this one to be honest. I just figured all Caribbean poli-tricks-ions had some immunity from prosecution because its alleged (and note I aint saying is true I saying is alleged) that some poli-tricks-ions in the Caribbean have been getting away with murder for years. Well not murder literally but some seriously questionable behavior when it comes to pocketing the states funds and such. Maybe, rather hopefully, this ushers in a new era of responsibility and accountability in the Caribbean. Tiefing politicians best be on their p's & q's from now on. Of course this may just turn out to be a one off and back to business as usual.

And then this morning I read about the next potential scandal right here in Canada. I know allya not going to read the link so I'll try to paraphrase the situation for you.

It is alleged that the current Prime Minister, when he was in opposition knew about attempts to bribe an independent MP to vote with the opposition to bring down the previous government. They even have the PM on tape saying he knew about the attempts! Talk about scandal!

The independent MP was dying and they were allegedly offering him a million dollar insurance policy. Forget corn beef and biscuits or curry goat poli-tricks this is serious million dollar business! Even his widow has come out and said that her husband told her of the offer and was offended by it and dismissed it.

Shocking!

That sounds like some serious bribery was attempted to me. I mean the man never take the bribe and he didn't vote with the opposition but the fact that a bribe was offered and the PM can say yea man I knew about it but I didn't tell them to do it seems like it could be grounds for some charges to be laid.

Actually a couple of things occurred to me on reading this story though:

(1) This is just related to one of the case details. The MP's widow who claims that a bribe was offered to her now dead husband is actually now running for the ruling Conservatives? Huh? Ok let me get this straight, your husband came to you enraged that the Conservatives offered him a bribe and said he was offended and said he was ashamed to have once been part of that party and a few years later you're running for them?

Yet even as you run for them you help in exposing that they tried to bribe your husband?

Whoa! I have to sit down and think through this one. Huh?

(2) This could really bring down PM Harper cause the man get in on a whole I will be a better politician and wont have scandals like the previous Liberal government campaign. Actually got to say for a first world country the politicians in Canada seem to always be embroiled in one scandal or another. One fella allegedly taking bribes from German businessmen, another set had a sponsorship scandal in Quebec now this. Pretty pathetic if you ask me. I really expected better of them but I guess poli-tricks is poli-tricks is poli-tricks wherever you go.

You would like to think though that your poli-trick-sions while shady would be smart enough to avoid being caught in things like these.

(3) Its still early in the story's cycle but I cant help but compare the reactions here to the reactions that would have been garnered if this story was happening in the U.S. I mean its front page news here but its still sort of flying under the radar like a whatever, who cares sort of thing. If this was the U.S, CNN, MSNBC and FOX would have it so that there was no way you could escape this story. They would devote days on end to it with three gazillion experts and eyewitnesses parading on tv ad infinitum til you were so tired of the scandal you would turn off your tv and become a news recluse.

Here the reaction is so subdued. I'm sure even if they decide to hold an inquiry into it we'll all still be like yea whatever man.

Follow up

(1) Ok so now we know what OBAY is all about.

Its actually an ad for the Ontario Colleges. Great promotion I think but as my bredren say not as cool as new Diamond Shreddies lol.

Oh and for anyone who is disappointed by this revelation that Obay isn't real don't despair Liks is definitely real.











Actually courtesy of my boy poeza we have added a new product to the Liks line. We call it "THE LOOK". It can take the place of Liks if you don't have the time for Liks or ya out in public and you dont want anyone to see you using Liks. The Look can be used as a stand alone product or as a precursor to Liks. Unlike Liks we dont offer a guarantee on the Look though.


(2) A 16 year old bank robber was arrested here yesterday. 16 years old?? blouse n skirt! As another friend of mine was saying this morning, when we were 16 the worse we were doing was stealing Pepsi bottles for a 25 cent refund at the school cafeteria not trying to take $150Gs from a bank while armed. Damn

(3) I found this rather ironic. The 21 year old son of the publisher of Today's Parent was sentenced to 4 1/2 years in jail for drug dealing and weapons possession. If ya not familiar with Today's Parent its a magazine for parents giving them suggestions and tips on raising their kids.

Of course give him two pounds of blow and a glock 19 isn't one of the suggestions they give and I don't think they've published a story on "the 10 ways to increase the efficiency of cooking your crack"and hopefully likely never will yet I just saw this story and had a "but wait you mean she giving people advice on how to raise dem children an she chile is a criminal getting lock up?" moment. Sorry it just doesn't help the credibility for me. Others I know disagree with me cause they say she is only the publisher but I say if ya telling people how to raise their children and yours turn out this way I would really got to question the advice ya duz give.

(4) Quick celebrity post from the you got to be a idiot file. I wasn't really following this whole Charlie Sheen, Denise Richards storyline but apparently they were in court again because she wants their two kids to be on a reality show and he says no way. I didn't really follow all of it but I thought well maybe Charlie was onto something. Then I was reading a brief article on the subway the other day and realize that Denise Richards' argument is that the children said they want to be in the reality show and she wants to do what they want. Court sided with her too and she won.

Is only then I realize that these clearly rational decision making children are ages 2 and 3. What kinda eediat ting dat? You going to let your 2 and 3 year old decide that they want to be in a reality show? What madness is that?

Its just a cartoon

Straight up racist those suckas were simple and plain ......
Fight the Power - Public Enemy

The above cartoon was in the Globe & Mail newspaper here last Monday.

Now you all know from some of my previous posts I'm not a big fan of the whole Afrocentric School thing being pushed here in Toronto but I found this cartoon tacky, classless and racist.

I mean I know the Toronto Star wouldn't have done something like that. The Sun well maybe back in the day cause they used to be kind of suspect with their commentary on black issues but the Globe & Mail ? Man I expect more from these guys. I mean they are supposed to be a National paper. A highbrow sheet favored by commuters on the, more luxurious than TTC, GO-Trains coming in from the burbs to work on Bay street. The go to paper for business news and all that supposed intellectual stuff that the white collar workers are checking for. I really wouldn't expect this from them.

Did they go out and hire the dude who came up with the noose cover for Golfweek?

Then I was reading a post over at Black Woman & Child blog with the response from the newspaper to readers who complained about the cartoon. It was one of the lamest excuses for an explanation I've seen in a long time talking about the intention of the cartoon was not to be racist and it was just being critical of the proposal for black focused schools.

Way to be critical! Man I don't even get that from the cartoon. Come on maybe y'all didn't think it was racist from where you sat but it is. I had to pause when I first saw this like man I cant believe a newspaper would print this drivel. Its racist, insulting and disrespectful. (Mind you its not as racist as the Barrie Police office's afrocentric math email but its still racist.)

And this is black history month too isn't it? Shame on you Globe & Mail but thanks for letting us see where you stand. Oh and don't you love how "it wasn't meant to be racist" or "there was no racial intent" seems to be our best catch phrases these days up in Canada?

p.s: Man they really swept this one under the rug though. If it wasn't for an email from Urbansista I wouldn't have even heard of this crap.

Oil of Obay

I was checking out the guys over at the War on Folly, a really nice site to browse by the way (yo Charles & Charles you guys need a comments option), and along with the video for the marriage proposal that got shot down at halftime at the NBA game I came across this photo

Courtesy Jonathan Goldsbie and originally seen at Torontoist. You can check the original if you cant see this one clearly.

I not sure what it is they actually advertising but this photo is from College and University just outside the Queens Park subway station. I verified it at lunch today (got to love that Metropass).

Actually there are a few of these Obay ads (from the makers of WhybecauseISaidSo) knocking around and I even noticed the campaign on the subway coming home this evening.

Anyway all this Obay talk got me thinking about my new old product that I'm trying to market and rebrand. Its a supplementary product, a catalyst so to speak, in case Obay or WhyBecauseIsaidSo don't just work on their own. I havent locked down the marketing scheme yet, I aint no expert but I have a rough rough draft of the first ad that I will share with y'all today



Yes people that is my new product. Liks! From the same people who brought you WaitYou FeelYouisAMan and IGineGiveYouSomethingtoCryBout. Liks dont be shy. Use it.

Liks and other related products are registered trademarks of the Whapax! aaaiiiiiiiieee! Corporation a fully owned subsidary of Whax Palax.

Whapax! aaaiiiiiiiieee! sharing Liks from before Jesus was a lad.

Liks - Order now for only three easy payments of $19.99. Belt sold separately.

Lawless

So this morning I on the bus. The service improvements like they actually happening cause the bus was half full. Anyway a few stops down the road this lady and her child get on the bus. Now cant say for sure how old the child is. I'm thinking 4 is the max although he was barely bigger than my two year old which is what brought him to my attention.

Actually to be honest I wasn't paying attention when they got on. I was reading and then I see this lil' chile in a bright jacket head straight for the back of the bus, unaccompanied, and climb the two steps into the back of the bus and went and sit down in the seat right at the back, the tall one where even my legs duz dangle sometimes.

So this catch my interest so I look up waiting to see a parent come bounding up the steps after him.. I'm watching this child for a few minutes and realize no body aint come to sit down with the chile at all. So I searching the bus cause I figured oh maybe the parent get caught up at the front looking for bus tickets or change or something. Umm nope. Looked up and saw the mother sitting down well and comfortable in the front seat of the bus paying absolutely no attention to the chile.

So we have chile under 4 all the way at the back of the bus legs dangling sitting down. And I know he under 4 maybe even under 3 cause he was walking in that unsteady rocking sort of way that toddlers walk especially when they are in their winter boots. And ya have mother sitting down at the front of the bus not a care in the world.

Aright well it aint like this particular bus full of the lawless school children as is the usual this time of morning so it wasn't so bad but to me I'm like why would I let my toddler go sit down all the way at the back of the bus without me. I don't care how independent the chile is or supposed to be, I figured at any moment she would come and drag he tail back to the front of the bus, call him and tell him to come sit down with her or at least come down in the back and sit with the chile.

No whole bus trip chile sit down by himself in the back, mother in the front until the mother was ready to get off and she come an take him with her.

I aint know but to me that is juss lawlessness on her part. Is not like we in a car or something, you in the bus. Public transit! I aint saying the people on the bus worse than the people in cars but you dont know the people in the bus. They are strangers. Place could be full of all sort of kidnappers, chile molesters, criminals. You dont know so you should keep ya chile close at hand.

And it aint to say the mother looked like one of these silly young wild girls dat aint know nuttin. She was dressed decent an she look like she in her thirties so ya cant use the he young and don't know excuse.

Boy these Canadian people duz boggle my mind sometimes.

helmet

While I commend Ontario in trying to make everyone feel welcome, well some more than others anyways, sometimes I think the whole political correctness and acceptance goes a little too far.

Case in point:

The Ontario Human Rights Commission has ridden to the defence of a Brampton man who says being forced to wear a motorcycle helmet instead of his turban runs counter to his religious faith.

Baljinder Badesha, above, who was charged by Peel police in September 2005 with failing to wear a helmet, said he understands the inherent dangers of riding a motorcycle without a helmet but is willing to take the risk to follow his Sikh tenets.

Now I am not against him following his religious tenets but the law is the law is the law and it says you need to wear a helmet to ride a motorcycle. Its not a frivolous law like some, its not a silly law like some, its not a clearly outdated law like some. Its in actual fact a pretty decent law. So if he doesn't want to wear a helmet to ride then don't ride a motorcycle.

Plus way I see it I duz see nuff rastaman wid big big big dreads wearing helmets. If they can find a helmet, or get one custom made to fit over their massive locks I'm sure he can find something to fit over his turban.

Bare nonsense from the Ontario Human Rights Commission if ya ask me. I mean again back to Rasta I'm sure if I was a rasta bunnin a spliff on the corner as my religion tells me to do and the police arrest me no Ontario watch dog group wasn't going to step up an say my rights being violated. No they would say I is a criminal an I need to obey the laws. I lie?

Ya can accommodate, ain't nothing wrong with that but there's got to be a limit where you say this is the law. When in Rome do as the Romans or just don't ride a motorcycle. Its as simple as that thats just my opinion.

What chu talkin bout Willis

I'm bigger than you and higher up the food chain. Get in my belly.
Fat Bastard - Austin Powers the Spy who shagged me

I almost loath blogging about celebrities these days but sometimes well you just have to.

Yesterday I read that Gary Coleman of Different Strokes fame got secretly married last August. Well good for him! Coleman is a small fella 4 foot 8 they say but the lady he marry is 5 foot 7. Even better for him. Power to the small man dem! Also he is 40 and she is 22. She was like 2 when his popular show was last on tv. What?? The man is a champion star! The words of Shabba's Twice My age come to mind.

Anyway as we discussed the news we were questioning what angle this woman coming from cause we say Gary aint no catch more like a catch an throw back. He shorter than a coffee table, he aint got nuh money and he aint too pretty pretty so we want to know what attract she to him. I give up on figuring it out, got better things to think bout so I go with her words that it was Love. As the old bajan saying goes every pot got it cover so maybe she is the one for him.

Again good for them.

But then today I read something else about the couple and it made me wonder if this woman either blind or got some sort of mental handicap.

The couple was interviewed and these are their words

"We may go a week and not speak to each other," he says, while she claims, "He lets his anger conquer him sometimes. … He throws things around, and sometimes he throws it in my direction." She adds, "I don't like the violence."

But wait! Wha wrong wid you girl? First you marry a midget and now you letting he throw things at you so? Wha you could only be blind or you head bad? You blind? You cant se the man is a midget? Look at the size of the man nuh woman! Two words for you girl. Body slam!

Bru Brax! Dun!

I know there is a saying that them short men duz be cruel and all de midgets I know evil but looka dont let nuh midget scare you chile. Looka them got shelters and organizations fa battered women, doan stan in no abusive relationship ya hear.

But if he wanta come test ya remember this; You are bigger than him. You are big enough to put him over your lap, pull out a belt and lash him.

wait -(lash) you (lash)- feel (lash)- you (lash)- big (lash) or what! (lash) Who (Lash) you think (lash,lash lash) you throwing (Lash) at (lash lash lash) nuh man (lash)? Ya (lash) best (lash) behave (lash) yaself (lash)

I guarantee if you do that one time he would think quick about throwing anything at you again.

ps: This blog neither condones spousal abuse or cruelty to small people. If I disappear next week in all likelihood I was kidnapped by a not so merry band of Dwarves.

ps2 : Happy Valentines to those who celebrate it

And it dont stop

I remember a few years back there was this light hearted email floating around about this Jamaican who moved up North and his perception of snow and winter.

November 19th - 2 degrees outside! More rahtid snow. Not a tree or shrub in our yawd that hasn't been damaged. Power was off most of the night. "Blouse and skirt" got mi first heating bill, Tried to keep from freezing to death wid candles and kerosene heater, tipped over and nearly burn the rahtid house down. I managed to put the flames out but suffered second degree burns on my hands and lost all my eyebrows and eyelashes. Car slid on the white s*** on the way to the hospital and was a write-off.

November 20th - Rahtid white ting keeps coming down! I have to put on all the clothes I own just to get to the mailbox. If I ever catch the **** that drives that rahtid snowplough, I gwine mek him mumma feel it. I think he hides around the rahtid corner and wait for me to finish shovelling, then comes down the street at about 160km/hr and cover up wi driveway again. Rahtid power still off.

November 21st - Twelve more centimetres of rahtid snow and rahtid ice and God knows what other kind of rahtid white s*** fell last night. I wounded the rahtid snow plough with the pick,but the driva got away. The wife took off and left me. The rahtid car won't start and I think I'm going rahtid snow-blind. I can't move my rahtid toes, haven't seen the bomboclaat sun in weeks and there's more rahtid snow predicted. Wind chill is 30 rahtid degrees below rahtid zero!!

November 22nd - Me a move back to JA cause dis ya place a go kill mi!

Well boy the last few weeks I sort of feel that way cause winter has been rough this year.

I mean I've been here a good few years and this winter just seems to have the most precipitation I've ever see. We literally getting wash way in snow. And I not just complaining about having to shovel it although that is a major part of my complaint but is also hard to walk and drive and basically do anything useful in.

An dont mind dem tv people that talking about how this is a normal winter and we had mild winters the last few years and get soft. Is lie dem tell! True we had milder than normal winters the last two or so years but even stretching back the last ten years, ignoring the ice storm in 99 0r was it 2000, we never had so much snow so bunched together. So I have a real issue when they call this abnormal weather normal.

I mean lets see, we had mildish weather a few days in January and the snow melt, then all a sudden we had snowstorm two Fridays ago. I mean all day snow, snow that tek me three trips to shovel, snow that mek nuff people had car accidents and nuff businesses close down for the day snow. Snow that they say if ya dont need to leave home dont leave type of snow.

Then more snow the Tuesday and Wednesday after that, then last Friday - Saturday and now today. And is not like how some snow duz come and hit the ground and poof disappear. No this thing sticking and then getting icy and got people stumbling around on the sidewalk.

Look I dun more shovelling in a week than the average poli-trickson when he running for office and this thing still aint stopping. I see people with snow piles that bout two three times my height. I personally dig out the driveway and the snow so high that it got one of my trees looking like a shrub now.

Anyway I wasting time with all this chat, let me go shovel some more so I can leff the house in the morning.

Madness

This is not a fete in hay this is madness
Madness - David Rudder

Well this week was Carnival. Forget Rio, forget New Orleans I think the best carnival might be Trinidad Carnival. No I have not been to it yet but from the stories I hear and knowing Trini people I just feel that Trinidad Carnival is special. What is it about Trini people? Of all the folk in the Caribbean they just seem to have this special joie de vivre that the other Caribbean people can only just look on, watch and be jealous of but cant emulate no matter how much they try.

I could say a little more but I leave it at that.

Anyway these two news articles from this weeks Carnival in Trinidad caught my eye and I thought I'd share.

Two sisters faked their kidnapping, so they could hide from their strict grandfather and sneak off to yesterday's Carnival celebrations.

Read the rest of the story here.

Imagine that! These two teenagers have police searching up and down the island for them and they fake their own kidnapping to go play mas. All I have to say is if I was the police or the grandfather when I find them it would be liks in dey tail.

And if I was a policeman I would be especially cruel cause bright Carnival day I could be down Port of Spain watching the ladies in their barely there costumes and trying to tief a wine but instead they got me beating the bush looking for these two rascals. Boy I would be real vex.

I had to say is a serious thing when you so in love with Carnival that you have to fake kidnapping to try and get past your grandfather's rules.

But speaking of tiefing a wine though this is the second story.

A woman turned in anger and stabbed a man she did not know for allegedly wining on her as bands paraded at the height of Carnival Monday festivities.

Last night, a man, Juma Modeste, 28, was listed in critical but stable condition at the San Fernando General Hospital.

Cuhdear! Poor fella! Look how he gone down carnival and nearly get kill.

But ya know what? This article had me thinking. First off I had to send it to all my partners cause I know nuff fellas that like to tief a wine here and there and I have to warn them that the women getting cruel these days so they best be careful.

One time ya coulda tief a wine easy so or the worse thing that would happen is the woman look round give ya a big stupse and walk way or put she hand on she bamsy or she turn around an cuss ya. Meanwhile the fella would be behind there feigning ignorance as to what going on, looking in any direction but at the woman but still trying hard to sidle up to her to get in his lil juk before all is said and done. (oh and by juk I mean wine or dance cause we had this deep discussion at the last Toronto bloggers get-together about the multiple meanings of that word, the Caribbean and urban definitions differ, after a certain blogger kept using it in conversation.)

See that was old time tiefing a wine but nowadays ya can get stab so I hope the fellas are careful. I wouldn't like to see nuhbody get hurt.

Another thing I thought of was there was this email making the rounds the last few weeks, pre- carnival, about the rules for tiefing a wine. Was six rules in all, things like pretend ya from Puerto Rico and dont speak English properly or make sure is a big tune playing that the girls love and they wont care who dance up on them etc etc. Well I was thinking this poor fella musse didnt know the rules and that is why he get stab. See dat! If he was on my email list I might have saved him pain an injury.

And finally the last thought I had on this incident was this. I don't remember which comedian it was, Chris Rock probably, but he does a cheesy standup bit about how women only cry sexual harassment when the man ugly. He claim that if the man look like Denzil and he make an improper statement to a woman nuhbody nuh worry themself. They just smile and nod and giggle or play it off but if is not Denzil but an ugly fella that make the statement the women quick to call police to get him arrest for harassment.

Well by that same logic I feel this wining fella was ugly cause if he did good looking the woman wouldn't have stab him she would probably be backing back on him some more.

Ok doan kill muh for that last statement is joke I mekkin.

Afrocentric Schools

I spent a lot of last week debating with friends on this whole Afrocentric school issue that is so much in the news here in Toronto. So much so that I'm actually a bit tired of the issue but I figured I still needed to blog about it, if only briefly, even though I already spoke about it in November in this post.

Last Tuesday, the Toronto District school board passed a vote approving the creation of one or more black focused public schools. Tight vote but passed by a 11-9 margin.

Now maybe my logic is faulty or I'm just not black enough or something but I have completely disagreed with this idea from the get go. However in the recent weeks I've been thinking about my stance after I saw some prominent and smart black folk in the community get behind this project. Had to analyze the stance cause well if folks like former Ontario MP Mary Ann Chambers can get behind this then maybe just maybe I'm wrong.

However, I've come to the conclusion that my stance shall remain unchanged for the short and most likely long term. Who knows maybe I am wrong but I still think this separate Afrocentric school thing is an absolutely terrible idea.

Now once again let me say that I think its great that someone has acknowledged that our black children are having problems in the present school system but I don't think this is the way to go about solving them. Apparently neither did the lone black trustee who voted again the proposal on Tuesday and was booed by the pro faction in the audience.

I'll give you a few of my reasons for being against this project.

For one, I think the entire school system needs to be fixed and I find this stance to be a small boutique like solution that wont help change the status quo as effectively as if we put some money into really fixing the entire system. Yes some kids may be helped but two, three schools can serve maybe 1000 - 1200 kids max when you have like 30,000 black kids in the system (saw that figure somewhere cant remember where though). This is really like throwing a pebble into the ocean isnt it? Cause don't try to fool me with this whole this system will be extended to all the schools in Toronto idea. Ya not going be able to do it!

Also just dealing with this from a curriculum perspective aren't we just basically saying black kids can't learn unless they have this specialized stuff? Well what happens when they go on to higher education? Do we expect the Universities and other places of higher learning to institute Afrocentric classes too? Actually how will universities judge the grades from an Afrocentric school when it comes to accepting its students? Will an 80% at Afrocentric school be translated as a 50% in a regular school? Who knows? Or maybe I'm getting ahead of myself, lets get them to pass high school first right.

Regardless I think we got to look at two things here well maybe three. One is the attitudes of teachers to black students. I think this needs to be changed and black students need more encouragement and to not be stereotyped and swayed down certain general paths to athletics and other pursuits which I'm sure those teachers probably think are the only things we have an affinity for. No recognize that black kids can do anything. Dont limit their options. Taking them out of the system and putting them in a specialized school may help some but all can't be put into segregated schools so I say change the schools and teachers mindsets that we already have.

Two, the attitudes and attention of the parents need to change. Get on your kids. Schools are there to assist in educating but you can't expect the schools to do everything. Instill in your child the respect for school and the urgency to learn and stay on their cases with what they need to achieve at school. Don't expect the teachers to do it all. Motivate man motivate. This is one of the reasons I really fear the failure of these black schools cause ya can change anything and everything but if the parents don't parent their kids properly all is lost.

Three. These kids have to realize for themselves that they need to respect school. Its not a game and you are not a little gangster. This goes for all kids regardless of color by the way cause I see your lil lawless asses on the bus every day acting a fool and pretending that you're cool. Yea cool has always been a teenage thing but y'all take it too far. Sorry to sound old here but this generation of school kids need to really assess whats going on.

Oh and for all those authority figures at the schools stop being afraid of these kids. I think a lot of the way some of these kids behave and are treated has to do with this fear that others have of black kids. We can't have the inmates running the institution I say. Treat them with respect but that doesn't mean fear them. Have them respect you too. But maybe thats just the general fear of a black planet that I see in this society.

Leads to another point. Ok, so I lied, there was one other thing, point 4, that I wanted to mention. We can't examine the performance of these kids in a vacuum as if this society doesn't exist. The drop-out rate is high amongst black youth but the entire blame cannot be put on the school system can it? If you are in an area with gangs even in the schools well its going to be tougher to be a success than if you're not int it? If you're not getting the support at home, as I mentioned before, its going to be harder to achieve. If ya hungry well brains need food too ya kno! If society is treating you as a failure a castoff before you even get out into the world saying you can only do this this and this but not that then it stifles creativity and productivity and motivation and why would you bother at school?

So lets not just look at curriculum. A lot more to getting these pass rates up than that.

To be honest some of the ideas I mentioned above are mentioned in some of the thoughts of what can go on in an Afrocentric school but I'm asking can't we demand more disciplined students, and teachers who wont fear them or stereotype them in the regular public school setting? Why must we segregate the students to institute these ideas?

Anyway for all the debate I had said from the get go that Premier McGuinty wasnt going to support Afrocentric schools and true to his word he hasnt. Which means although the school board has approved the project it may not even get off the ground cause they need $350,000 from the province to get this going.

And oh what happens if these schools do get implemented and they fail? Again for the umpteenth time I think the broader school system should be targeted. We're letting the Toronto school board off by demanding this small scale solution as changes need to be made globally to the system. And with our current demand for implementation of these schools to be honest I'm afraid that if they don't work the school board will be loath to listen to us again and try some other idea. Maybe it'll just harden society's minds even more into thinking that black kids are somehow dumber than the rest. This Afrocentric school thing better work.

Like De La said Stakes is high.

Canadian!

Sigh where to start?

Ok well I had wanted to do a post on the whole Golf-gate controversy surrounding Kelly Tilghman's comments in reference to Tiger Woods and Golfweek's follow up. In essence although I think Tilghman was an idiot for using the word lynching I didn't get too riled up because I just figured she was clueless or made a mistake. It wasn't deliberate or at least I don't believe it was premeditated. It was dumb, it was improper but it wasn't deliberate. Golfweek's subsequent action in putting a noose on their cover was however just blatantly wrong and inexcusable though. Mind you I believe that the firing of the editor who approved the image has less to do with the impropriety of the image and more to do with the market's reaction. When subscribers and advertisers speak heads roll, remember Imus? So don't think that Golfweek was just doing the right thing from a moral standpoint. Like the Lox this was all about the Benjamins baby.

And through all this mini-hoopla Tiger sweeps it under the rug. Non-issue for him he says. Of course it is cause well after all he's not black, he's cablasian. Whatever dude!

Canada and Toronto are alot like Tiger Woods. They just sweep the racist ish under the rug. Maybe if we pretend it didn't happen then it'll go away seems to be the thinking.

I was a little disturbed by the report of anti-black graffiti at one of our places of higher learning last week. When places we consider our centres of liberal thinking can be subjected to this type of stuff then one really wonders about our society.

What is to be noted here here was the faculty's slow response to the concerns of the students. Yet another example of sweep it under the rug. Canada and Canadians just tend to take a very cavalier, whatever man attitude towards racially charged incidents. (Oh and also tell me why City tv had to flash the graffiti on its news cast even though it contained a racial slur?)

There have been other incidents here; the racial threats to the prison guards at the Don Jail, the whole Nippertipping thing happening with Asian fishermen north of Toronto. Yet Canadians seem to either ignore these incidents or deny that there is any racial aspect to them. Its an ostrich, head in the sand mentality. Denial is more than a river in Egypt.

Ever thought about Canada and its melting pot of inclusiveness to immigrants and minorities though? Where are the minority leaders in this country challenging for a place at the tables of power? The US has Obama and before that Jesse and that was the 80s. How come we don't have any minorities running for leader of one of the federal parties? Actually come to think of it how many federal MP are visible minorities? How many Provincial MPs are visible minorities? Mayors? City Councilors even?

I'll leave you to draw your conclusions but don't for one second think that his place is any better than the US in terms of minorities breaking the glass ceilings to success.

Oh and now the word Canadian is slang for black in the US apparently. If only they knew the reality of Canada.

I can see clearly now

Dear Neighbor on the corner,

Look is not that I don't appreciate your willingness to share your bounty of wealth with us your fellow neighbors. No is nothing so at all. I am all for your community minded spirit of giving. More power to ya and I wish that more neighbors shared your spirit!

And is not that I jealous of your bounty of riches or anything so. No far from that, I am quite delighted in your windfall and aspire to be just like you one of these days.

But my friend, let me give you some advice. Invest in some curtains nuh man, some beaded blinds, some bamboo shutters, drapes even hang up a lil sheet or something so cause fa me personally I really don't need to see what you watching on your tv.

I mean cheese on bread yes ya got a 72 inch LCD HD with DVD or whatever size big behemoth tv that even Stevie Wonder could see in his sleep but that don't mean that ya got to share the tv wid everybody in the neighborhood so.

I mean every evening I coming home and from 'bout two blocks up the road I can see what it is you watching. Today it was Dora de Explorer and even though I marveled at the HD like pretty pretty colors of Dora and her cousin Diego that were jumping out at me from the tv screen coming through your window, I, a man in the street, and not only a man in the street but a man in the street two blocks down the road aint have no right seeing your tv clearer than the Cinema screens at Scarborough Town Center.

This is serious ya know. I mean yes the neighborhood fairly safe and all that but my man that don't mean you need to advertise that you got a television screen so big that people can turn the school parking lot three blocks away into a drive in. Ya just asking fa trouble with that.

Yes the living room is all glass and ya gots nice furnitures and knickknacks and whatchamaycallits and ya got a nice view that ya can recline an watch the tv and look outside and see the lawn and the birds and the squirrels and all sorta nature in the comfort of ya own home but would it kill ya put up some curtains?

I just telling you this for your benefit ya kno.

Still who am I to look a gift horse in the mouth. Next time I pass by I bringing long my lawn chair an pull up wid a drink an sit down and start watching the tv. And doan feel that you gine change the channel to get me to move ya kno or doan play ya getting vex cause I outside peeping in ya house cause clearly you trying to run some sort of cinema and I feel that I wouldnt be doing my neighborly duty if I didnt sit down and give you some company outside. A mean ya might feel that we ignoring ya or not supporting ya or someting so i I dont do that.

And while ya at it looka try an watch something more entertaining man. Some football or basketball or something wid some shooting or some car chases or some sorta action would be better. Dora is nice but big man aint gine sit down outside an watch that forever.

Yours sincerly
Jdid

ps: Wait ya kno I feel my universal remote will work wid dat big tv so doan feel the tv possessed with evil spirits if all a sudden the channel change to Sarah Connors and you see two big red ugly Terminator eyes staring at ya or um change sudden, sudden so to Top Model cause I want to see Tyra in HD LCD, blue ray DVD life size vision.

Oh and tell that big head chile of yours to stop walking up an down in front the tv every two minutes before I come inside an pop two slaps cross he head. He aint kno big people outside trying to watch tv. Like he trying to offset my concentration. chupse!

Brand New Day (maybe)

Yesterday was election day in Barbados and the incumbent BLP government got turfed, (ps somebody try and edit that BLP wikipedia entry) the boot, throw way, kicked out of power. So long, siyonara, arevaderchi, au revoir, it was nice while it lasted.

In Barbados, we usually don't have close elections and this one followed form with the former opposition DLP giving the incumbents a 20-10 lashing! A so it a go sometimes I guess. Good for the Dems (DLP) considering about 8 years ago they only had 2 seats in the Parliament, tonnes of infighting and word was they might be on their way to becoming irrelevant to the masses.

Anyway after 12 years of BLP rule its a brand new day (hopefully), brand new bag, brand new funk, brand new DLP government, brand new poli-trick-sions.

Congrats to new PM David Thompson (somebody do a wikepedia entry fa the man nuh) and his party and umm I meant that term poli-trick-sions in the nicest possible way sir.

But me still cant believe we elected a PM who went to Caw'mere. Soon all a we will be singing under an um-ba-rella ella ella eh eh eh. Lawd ave mercy!

Ya know what I like about Bajan elections though? Nuh big lot of drawn out preamble like in the US. Election call just before Christmas, a few weeks later election done. Compare that to the US with all sort of primaries, secondaries and tertiaries , two years of campaigning and nuff long drawn out speech-ifying where after the first debate the candidate really doesn't say anything new at all. No wonder the electorate duz get tired and fall sleep and become despondent and don't carish and eventually don't vote. Plus all this long lotta campaigning mek it so is only millionaire can compete for the Presidency and the House and Senate cause you need nuff, nuff, nuff money to carry staff and have election supplies for that long a campaign. Ya cant run no lil corn beef n biscuits campaign or as my friends in Jamaica would say Curry Goat campaign for that long at least not given the high price of eclipse biscuits or goat these days. I lie?

Contrast the US with their millionaire candidates with Barbados where we have certain politicians (both who I think won) who don't even own a car let alone have millionaire status. That is democracy star! Respect that!

Anyway regarding the Barbados elections now its all over all the experts and pundits and know-it-alls will come out the woodwork and pontificate on the results saying they predicted this outcome and trying to make it seem like they really have a clue. Hindsight really is 20-20 isn't it?

Last night listening to CBC Barbados from the time results start coming in I hear all sort of man chat about how they predict the undeclared people from the surveys done prior to the polls
would vote Dems (DLP) and how they knew winds of change were blowing since most of the region who have held elections in the past year, TnT being the exception, have voted out the incumbents and yada yada yada. Yea fa true? Well all ya wasn't saying that prior to the election so hush up!

Anyways well that is just the start as the talking heads will continue ad nauseum for days and months to dissect this election result looking for trends and nuance and extrapolations and answers to the whys and what not of the outcome. Cant hate on the analysis. But being a budding pundit myself I feel that all the so-called experts overlooking the real reason former PM Owen Arthur lose. Its so simple and yet they can't see it.

I wont waste time with more preamble but get to the point. Look for all the talk about insular Bajans who don't like people from the rest of the region and feel they better than them Bajans like their leaders to have non-Bajan wives. That is the truth people!

To prove my point consider the history of the former Bajan Prime Ministers why don't we. (this theory is limited to post-1966 independence analysis by the way).

The father of Independence; the Skipper Errol Barrow was married to an American. Following him Tom's wife wasn't Bajan either (at least as far as I know), Sandiford's wife is from yard, Owen's former wife was from yard, new PM David Thompson's wife is from St Lucia. You see the trend? Coincidence ?? I say not!

And some of you that know Barbados will say but Jdid what about Bree St John who was prime minister for a year from '85 to '86 after Tom Adams died? His wife was Bajan wasn't she? That don't fit your hypothesis.

Very perceptive I'd say in response. The answer to that is yes she was/is Bajan and if you don't examine carefully that would seem to spoil my hypothesis but in fact if you do really know the history this case really proves my theory about Bajans not wanting Bajan first ladies.

Examining Bree's tenure lets make it clear that Bree never won an election, never ever got a clear mandate from the people, only Bajan PM you can say that about, and in fact presided over the worse defeat by a ruling party in Barbados history when his Bees (BLP) were routed 24-3 by the Skipper's Dems back in 1986. Coincidence that he had a Bajan wife and loss so bad at the polls? I think not! See my point? Alright then.

And is it coincidence that Owen Arthur won three elections when he was married to a Jamaican but now that he divorced recently and married a Najan lady he lost so badly? Hmmm. Wunnah can decide for wunnah selves but I think the facts are clear. Owen loss this election from the time he divorce the Jamaican lady and marry a Bajan. I feel he should have gone Guyanese but that is juss me.

See for all the talk about insular Bajans we doing our part for regional integration. No Bajan first ladies allowed. The record speaks for it self and the proof is in the pudding people.

So see de I, I think if I want to get into the poli-tricks business I must look for a new non-Bajan wife so I can compete on an even footing. :-)

ps: I hope no one takes this post serious cause I know sum a wunnah would start cussing me now but like I always say refer to the title of the blog.

This n That

(1) Its bad enough they're sending Marion to jail but now they trying to mess with my girl Mary.

A new report claims that certain entertainment stars are linked to the steroid scandal. They named 50 Cents, Mary J Blige, Wycleff Jean, Timbaland and Tyler Perry.

Anything to get Roger Clements out of the spotlight I guess. Chupse!

Look who really cares if these stars used steroids? Do steroids or HGH help you to sing better? Is it like those Ghost Weed skits from De La Soul's Art Official Intelligence album where the Ghost weed helped you to drop rhymes like certain rappers? Was Tyler Perry on an HGH binge when he came up with his Madea character?

Look these Hollywood types have been going under the knife, botoxing, enhancing, siliconing, bleaching, tanning and the like for donkey years in order to enhance appearance. If they are using HGH and steroids now its not the same as an athlete who is using this stuff to compete against another athlete and break sporting records. So big deal!

I can just see congressional hearings into Entertainers and steroids?
Congressman: Mr Perry, And is it true that Madea's tirades are fueled by your rampant steroid abuse?
Perry: What? You do know Madea is a fictional character right?
Congressman: Just answer the question Mr Perry, stop trying to throw us off track here.

(2) BET founder Bob Johnson criticizes Obama? What? Seriously? You mean Bob 'I sold out the black community with my shucking and jiving channel' Johnson can criticize anyone? Ok maybe Obama did some drugs or did some questionable stuff in his teen years but ummm isn't that like 99% of the folk you promote on your channel? You've made money off promoting and giving voice to dudes who have claimed to slang rock, peddled yayo, carried weight, moved fishscale and God knows what else (While giving some credible real artists the shaft I might add) and you're going to get on a high horse here?

Look I'm not saying you need to support Obama cause he's black or anything I'm just questioning what gives you the moral high ground to attack Obama given your record of exploiting and demeaning black culture.


(3) Random and completely innocent dude accidentally gets shot and killed on Yonge street Friday night by some cats who were trying to shoot a strip club bouncer. The victim just happened to be walking up the street to the subway to go home to his family when the incident occurred.

Tell me where's the outrage? Where's the we're being slack on crime and innocents are suffering outcry that followed Jane Crebe's death two years ago? I mean there are similarities right? Random innocent bystander gets shot downtown, in the heart of the city, on Yonge street right? Where's the outrage man? A child is left without a father and a wife without a husband. I'm just saying.

Detergent Math

Any of you guys know about Detergent Math?

I'm serious so don't look at me like I loss my head. This is serious analytical mathematical business we dealing with. So either you familiar with the concept or you're not but don't start laughing at me til you hear me out.

Let me explain. Allya familiar with laundry detergent? Either the powdery kind or the liquid kind that does come in a container with a cup or the cap having markings to explain how to derive a cup or two cups full of the said detergent? Allya familiar with that? Allya really really familiar with that? Ya ever take a look at the markings on the cup or the cap that shows you what the detergent measurements are?

Well that is the foundation of detergent mathematics right there. Cause ya see if you take a close look at those cup markings you will realize that they don't make any sort of rational sense at all. Compare them and you will notice some serious discrepancies if you try to use regular mathematical logic. Is like the detergent makers just arbitrarily put some lines on the cup.

Follow me now: If the mark showing one cup full is 10 cm from the bottom of the cup how the mark for 2 cups going to be only 3 cms above that first mark unless the cup is a conical shape? Otherwise the first cup full is about three times bigger than the second cup full. That don't make no sense! In no sorta world duz 13 times x equal 2 times 10 times x! ....... except de world of detergent math

And all the detergent cups I've checked have similar types of concepts. In detergent math 2 cups of detergent is 1.25 x 1 cup of detergent or 1.3 x 1 cup of detergent. Check the cups in the detergent box good and tell me if I lie?

Is like dem fellas must have some sort of advanced carry the one, integrate x to the derivative of the cosign arc tangent viscosity variable raised to the power of one over pi x times the free flow cubed, ice cubed, rubix cubed formula to work out them markings man.

Is Detergent math. Take a look at the detergent fa true. Wha allya know bout dat?

Ethnic Hair

Got soul like that Afro pick with the black fist!
My mellow, my man - The Roots

So yesterday I went into Shoppers Drug Mart to do some shopping; grab some cold meds, some cheap nobody loved me enough to purchase me so now I'm on discount chocolate etc etc.

I didn't really have no list with me but since I go there so infrequently by the time I hit the door
I had like ten things I needed to stock up on. One was some hair grease and by grease I mean well lets just say that I using that term loosely cause my family duz refer to almost any product ya duz put in ya head as grease even if it aint suh greasy. We doan moisturize, condition, nor gel we duz grease! Ya understand?

'Looka try an grease ya scalp boy!'

Anyway so I walk into Shoppers, see the sign for the hair products and walk downed the aisle, which I should probably refer to from now on as the "regular hair products" aisle, but didn't see anything at all that looked familiar to me. Seeing all sorts of mousse, conditioner, holding gel and shampoos, VO5s, Garniers, Pantenes, Herbal Essences and other generic products that may be grease-like but don't really correspond to my needs in term of hair grease.

Where the TCB at son? Where my Jeri juice, the curl activator? What no Lusters Pink? no Sta-sof-fro. Doan even think bout open ing wunnah mout to tell me wunnah aint got nuh Sporting Waves or I gone den!

Wait wha kinda stupid store wunnah could be doah? Chupse! Wunnah mekkin sport den! Wunnah gine mek me have to go an check someplace like Novellette shop down on Eglington West (anybody see that Kink in My hair sitcom yet? Trust me is nice.)

So I was thinking to myself maybe these guys dont carry any black hair products although this is Scarborough and I know some of the other Shoppers Drugs I've been in do carry them.

It was then as I walked down another aisle searching for the cough medicine that I butt up on the sign saying "Ethnic hair products" and the corresponding products which in my opinion turn out to be mostly black hair products with a few items made in Greece and Australia thrown in. (Grease made in Greece aint that ironic somehow?)

Now before I say anything else let me mek it clear I not making any big issue out of this I just find it funny so I commenting. I got some questions for these ethnic hair people.

Why were those hair products separate from the other hair products? Ok I can see putting all of the black hair products together or all the hair product produced a foreign together but did they really need a separate aisle? Couldn't they keep them together but within the same aisle as the "regular hair products"? It wasn't a space issue cause the store could have rearranged things to do that.

I mean it was a little confusing. Confusing as hell actually cause if I walk in and just see the sign for Hair Products where logically all hair products should be and not see what I looking for in that aisle then odds are I would take my business elsewhere cause I normally wouldn't be looking for a sign saying ethnic hair products.

I mean logically one would think you would keep all hair products together and not scatter them around. Wha happen dem frighten de ethnic hair products taint de regular hair products so dem segregating the hair products. Cuhdear!

(And for the person who will say but in the supermarket they separate out the foods and have aisles with imported foods etc is not the same thing.)

Secondly what really is with the ethnic hair products designation? What exactly is an ethnic hair product? Y'all got some Russian hair grease in deyso? New Delhi mousse? Scottish gel? Or is that short form code for products imported from outside North America or products for people whose hair is not naturally straight or products that regular people who duz shop in the "regular hair product" aisle don't use?

I feel to solve all this wunnah need to put all the hair products together and just put up one big sign saying hair grease.

Anyways that is all I got to say I gine an mek myself useful an grease my head.

Bhutto dead

Why does it seem like something tragic is always happening just before or after Christmas every year?

The murder/assassination of Benazir Bhutto today in Pakistan is tragic but hardly surprising in my mind. From the time she returned to Pakistan a few months ago she has been in danger. It started just after she landed in Pakistan when militants tried to blow up her car in a procession. An attempt that killed over 160 persons but failed to harm Bhutto.

This time they got her though. Shot through the neck and then a bomb. I guess they weren't taking any chances.

This comes at a time when the country prepares for general elections on January 8th with Bhutto having been one of the main opposition leaders trying to wrest control from current leader and some might say dictator Musharraf. Her death is sure to throw the whole country into an uproar.

Last week Bhutto spoke out on the religious schools in her country which she claimed were making killers out of children. I'm sure this probably didn't go down well with some of the radical elements in her country. Bad enough that a politician is making those statements, bad enough that the politician is seen as pro-US and pro-western but even worse that its a female politician probably.

Got to wonder why Bhutto who previously held the presidency only to be forced into exile returned to her homeland in the hopes of regaining power. She was literally marked for death from the get go so was it bravery, stupidity, idealism or hunger for power that made her put her life in jeopardy for a chance to lead a country with such a fragile stability?

Whatever it was it cost her her life. RIP.

Merry Christmas

Wishing all of my readers and fellow bloggers a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. In case you want something more to read check out my Ol Time Christmas post from two years ago. Blessings!

More than Culture

I kno mi roots n culture (murderer!)
Shabba Ranks - Roots n Culture

The facts are this: A Mississauga father strangled his 16 year old daughter Aqsa Parvez to death last week. The media pounced on the story because the two had apparently been arguing over whether the Muslim girl should wear her hijab or not.

It became a story not about domestic violence or child abuse but rather a story about how
cultures clash or how some immigrants can't integrate into western society or basically those evil Muslims.

I tend to disagree somewhat with the media's coverage.

To me, assuming that the hijab was part of the issue since I've read other stories that say it was just a fraction of what the arguing was about, its more a story of a child who challenged her parent's rules and a parent whose reaction to that challenge got out of hand. There was a cultural aspect because of what they were allegedly fighting about but this story could have played out exactly the same way in other cultures or religious families.

So to me I just see the media's reporting as sensationalizing the story to get us to fall for that "evil Muslim" or that look how different these immigrants are from us angle that they would like us to always believe.

Yes the killing was unique because a Western raised non-Muslim would probably not be killed by a parent over a hijab but he/she might have been killed or attacked over dating someone from what was perceived as the wrong ethnicity or race, over wearing something that the parent considered improper or even not wanting to follow the parents religious beliefs. It has happened before, it will happen again. Its the same thing just no hijab involved.

The problem is that our society likes to categorize incidents involving minorities. One drug dealer of black or Caribbean descent becomes all black men sell weed and carry guns and are in general dangerous. One Muslim father who went way too far in disciplining his child becomes look at these Islamic folk. See how they behave and why cant they just assimilate to the dominant culture. Its a reinforcement of the fear of the unknown and the different. Different means scary in these parts and these stories reinforce this.

Somehow the positives never get distributed that evenly do they?

To be honest when I first heard the story my thoughts were look how teenage rebellion can go wrong. Look how she play she disobeying the old man and the man get ig'rant and kill she just so.

Teenagers can get on your last damn nerve regardless of their culture and some parents do see red when they think that their child is disobeying some fundamental tenet of their law. As a West Indian I've heard plenty of stories of parents who would throw at or lash their kids with whatever was handy including shoes, clothes irons etc if the kid disobeyed them or as we would say in Barbados "feel dat duh big" or "get too big for he/she boots".

I'm not saying that's right I'm just saying that is/was how it was. I've head similar stories from other cultures.

The facts are parents need to discipline kids. They don't need to throw stuff at them or choke them to death or indeed get violent to do it but they need to exert strong discipline. Everyone does this differently and sometimes stuff gets out of hand as it apparently did with Asqa and her dad. Don't get me wrong its a dreadful story and her father deserves full punishment because parents should protect their children not kill them.

But its a story that's not unique to any culture or religion as some media outlets would have you believe. No need for cultural or religious labels this is simply a tragedy.

Rest in Peace Aqsa. What a sad way to go.

Church Shooting

I guess one isn't safe anywhere these days.

I'm referring to the folk who were killed in a church in Colorado yesterday.

What I find interesting though is that the gunman was shot by a security guard at the church. (OK disclaimer I really haven't followed all the info on this incident particularly closely so forgive me if I'm wrong but the reports said the gunman was shot by church security.)

Whoa! Hold up! Did I miss something? Since when Church had security guards? I neva been to church with security guards have you? I mean I know earlier this year I mek joke about fete church but security at church? Armed security at church! Fa real?

Blouse n skirt!

Church must really turn into bashment. Wha kinda rowdiness a gwan at church that dem need security guard. OK so it did come in handy this one time but church shootings are not a norm are they? I reminded of that Shaggy's recent Church Heathen song. Maybe next we will see dress code at church. Actually hmmm that might not be such a bad idea. Make it so number one.

I'll leave it there though and not make any comments about these watered down mega churches and their self-help Tony Robbins style sermons.

All I have to say is things ruff when church have armed security. Wow!